The Doorway: a panfandom game

I do not know if there is any proper way of saying this without meaning to be offensive. So I am just going to place a disclaimer here and inform you that I do not mean to be offensive when I inquire about this.

Why would you want to learn about yourself through your various media? What compels you to read the books and watch the show? There have been both positive and negative reactions from doing such, so I wonder if it is worth it. I have not bothered to find myself in anything, in particular because I do not wish to know what happens to me in the future. I feel like it might not change anything. Perhaps the Tesseract would take me back and I would have no recollection of my experience here happening at all, as I have seen with someone people who have gone and returned.

Filtered to Julie:

Is there anything specific one wears to a Presidential Inauguration? Also, if there is any room after other people have signed themselves and their friends up, let me know. I want to ask someone to come along but I do not want to impose.

Filtered to Stiles:

Your friend from your world is here. I wonder if you So I have read up on your show and I remember reading This is difficult to say. Hi. I'm going to Washington D.C. on Monday.

I got a job today! I now sell insurance! Not sure what kind, but really it's all about the same though isn't it?

Pleasant people to work for! I even have my own office! Apparently this is a bit of a good thing; not sure though, it even says "The Doctor" on the door. Took some doing, at first they didn't want me there, but I was able to convince them when I sat down and started selling! I have a door that says 'The Doctor'. It's a glass door, which kind of defeats the purpose of doors I suppose; it's more of a window, that opens like a door. A woor if you will, or a dindow... dwindor! I have a window too, rather big; hard to open, apparently that's frowned upon.

That's my adventure today. Not sure I really like this whole chatting online thing, seems a bit anti-social; prefer face to face, maybe I'll sell the insurance at doorsteps instead!

I think I may now also work as a baby sitter, not quire sure though. The child was brilliant though; called himself Marcovhi: The Great Magician. Couldn't do a lick of magic though, so he's got some work to do.

OH! And you may experience slight blurriness on the telly this evening, I've managed to move my locator to the roof for better access! Nothing too badly, and if you start being forced to watch Swamp Loggers make sure you appreciate all they do!

[Filtered to Drew Tanaka]

Miss Tanaka,

It has recently come to my attention that it is becoming increasingly difficult to maintain a respectable appearance in this city while remaining solitary. I have read over your network posts and have come to the conclusion that you are nearly as disliked by Percy Jackson and his ilk as am I. Ergo, I would like to make you a business proposition.

I require a girl who is willing to behave as my girlfriend in a public setting. I expect nothing whatsoever in private. In return, I will happily provide you with all the little trinkets, the clothing, the spa days and various beautifications that you require in order to reflect well upon me. You would acompany me to various public events and act publicly as if you cared for me. As I said before, I expect nothing from you in private other than your word that you tell no one - and I mean no one - of this deception.

If this proposition is agreeable to you ( and I do not see why it wouldn't be ), we will have our first outing this Friday, when I shall take you to the theater to see a dramatization of Virgil's Aenid. No doubt you will need clothing and accessories for this outing, and I will be most generous.

Please notify me of your answer with all due haste.

Sincerely,

Octavian, Legacy of Apollo, Augur of Camp Jupiter, Business Manager of the Potts Tower Youth Center.

Filter to Cato
Can I come by and hit you? Or things? This place is wearing on my nerves the more I leave my rooms. Trying to play nice with the world is so not my nature but I feel it's safer that way.

Public
The city is almost overwhelming. The Capital was fascinating but I never got to see much of it, really - but it feels darker, grimier here. Almost gritty and lurking. I still... , I am not sure what to do with myself when I am not taking classes or training, but I think, I'd rather just train. It's a comfort thing, really I guess at this point.

( S.H.I.E.L.D. Advisory Notice to Potts Tower Network )

Anytime not spent in my SHIELD training has been spent in the gym, crafting or sleeping lately. I am enjoying my time so far - even if the lot of it has been tedious paperwork. Although I feel it will be worth it. If not, there are other career paths for me. Though I doubt I will need them.

I am working on a new bow too, which has been hard work and expensive. I cannot wait to see how it comes out at the end of it all.

[Filtered to Dr. Betty Ross-Sampson, Dr. Leonard McCoy, and Ms. Inara Serra]

Have success with studying amyotrophic sclerosis diseases. Believe can construct treatments for current affliction. Must warn for extended treatment process over process of one or two months. Input from Drs Ross-Sampson and McCoy invaluable to discovery. Likely would not have found solution otherwise. Impressive work. Will note contribution. Project from Stark Industries also good insight.

Would like to begin series of treatments. Expect full recovery six to eight weeks. Would be sooner but technology limited. Will address further requirements with Stark. Happen to know good engineers currently on planet familiar with concepts. Lucky.

[End Filter]

[Filtered to Normandy Crew]

Would like to offer dinner. Time negotiable based on crew schedules.

[End Filter]

[Private]

Guessin River found a way to get my mind off that talk with Inara. Well, til dinner tonight. Gotta figure what she's gonna tell the crew. Can't say I'm lookin forward to it. Kaylee's gonna take it hard. Mebbe I should get her somethin. Ain't much gonna help. Ain't nothin, more like.

Startin to wonder if I'm gonna get to some point where'n I don't much concern myself about folk comin or goin through that tesser thing. Ain't seemin like any of it's permanent any such way.

[Public, Filtered to 18+]

Another poker night this Friday. Same as before, ain't gonna bog you down in details. You know em or you don't.

>> What do you want me to call you?

Catholic church assaulted with petrol bombs, as loyalist riots continue. Water cannons and batons used to break up fighting between republicans and loyalists disputing the flag policy

...Rioters threw bricks and fireworks as police...

All because the fucking Union flag isn't to fly over the Belfast city council any more. This is all to do with a fucking flag and Northern Ireland loyalist not feeling as though they're being able to proudly display their fucking Britishness enough.

It's been 107 years since I went back to Dublin, it's been 97 since the Irish revolution -- Eight years since the Provisional IRA decommissioned and still, still nothing has fucking changed, has it? It's the same fight.

I can't believe this, I really can't.

[Grantaire]

In the mood to burn a flag?

FILTERED TO PETER PARKER (616) and MINDY MACREADY:

Are we going to set up ground rules?

FILTERED TO JOHN SHEPARD:

I've got a netflix queue the size of my arm and a couple sore ribs from a patrol last night that you're not supposed to know about. Doing anything tonight?

FILTERED TO CASSIE LANG:

Cassie, I wanted to apologize for snapping at you the other night. I let my temper get the best of me, and lord knows I've never been good at talking to anyone, especially not teenagers. You deserved a lot more understanding than what I gave you, and for that I apologize.

If you want to get together anytime soon, to spar or see a movie or something, you can always come to me. Likewise, if you still have questions that I have answers for.

Hello. Am I using this correctly? My name is Guinevere. I just arrived this morning.

( Delivery for Moya )

Good afternoon, Gentlemen and Ladies.

The existence of (the now defunct) AskJeeves.com was recently brought to my attention. I was rather intrigued.

Thanks to the wonders of modern convenience, my gentleman has become marginally more self-sufficient which I believe to be the greatest example of scientific and social progress imaginable, even if it comes at my own expense.

For example, now, because Mr. Wooster has taken a shine to waking up the the 'music' of Lady Gaga as emitted from his digital alarm, I am no longer needed to rouse him (most of the time). Poor quality cocktails are now pre-packaged in offensively styled bottles that only require un-capping. Letters are not transferred via electronic device, and thus my duties as mail-deliverer have been reduced (though I still need to hand deliver the vocabulary-rich notes taped to our door regarding Mr. Wooster's early morning/ late evening jazz piano practice).

Regardless, as a man who has always valued self-education and providing aid for others, I would like to reinstate, here, the AskJeeves.Com programme. If anyone has an inquiry about anything, I will research the topic and provide an answer.

There are no subjects which I consider off limits -- in a way, I would like to act as a refugee concierge. My services will go beyond the mere supply of information. For a fee I will also locate and deliver requested objects, clothing, etc. Of course, I must always work around the set schedule of my gentleman, Mr. Wooster, but otherwise I can promise timely, exceptional and unrivalled results.

Thank you Sincerely,

R. Jeeves

( Left in a silver gift bag outside the door of Snow/Charming's Apartment )

[Text to Morag Macdougal]
>> If you aren't too busy how would you feel about a little window shopping and job searching on my part this afternoon?

Nothing brings memories of the Alliance back quicker than filling out paperwork. Almost enough to make a girl feel homesick.

Who: Jason Todd Wayne & Elaine Mallory
Where: Their Brownstone Offices
What: Soulgazing, ie: co-building inhabitants pre-screening
When: Early Afternoon
Rating: TBD

( It just had to be done, not that she wanted to do it )

Can anyone point me to the library? I need to make a donation.

[Filter: Regina Mills]

Really? I didn't need proof, Regina. Or did you forget about Henry's book?

This gift? Was a waste of time.

I decided to brave the throngs of people and stampede of taxis this morning. Well, more accurately the lack of food in my cabinets drove me outside to look for a grocer's instead of my thirst for adventure. In hindsight, I should book an entire day to look for food. There were so many options! Organic this, gluten-free that, sugar-free stuff, peanut-free thingamabobs, and fun-free candies.

All I can say is God bless a good jar of Jiff's creamy peanut butter. It was my saving grace after I saw how inedible the organic whole wheat trans-fat-free pie crust looked. That is a crime against humanity.

I'm beginning to think this Cracked.Com website needs to stop giving away my secrets.

As seen here and here.

Police detectives ought to take note. This might help you make less of a mess of things before I'm called in to do your jobs for you.

It took all of seven minutes after my fall down an escalator before someone uploaded a video of it onto youtube. FML.

On a related note, there is a disturbing amount of videos of people falling down escalators.

FILTERED TO RICHARD CASTLE:

This is probably weird but Hi! I'm Kim Possible and we spoke briefly when you first arrived. I'm not sure if you remember or not, but it's not important.

The reason I'm even writing anything is because I was watching some TV just now and I glimpsed my face, but not as a cartoon. I started to watch the show and it didn't take very long for me to figure out that it was your show and the face was your daughter, which explained a lot from when we first spoke way back when.

Anyway, I'm sure that this is really weird for you, but I did watch a few episodes and it seems like your daughter is really pretty great. I hope she shows up here soon because it's obvious you care about her deeply, which makes sense since she's your daughter and all. And finally, I'm sorry if it's confusing having me around; I've always looked like this to me, so it's a bit confusing to me as well.

Um So I don't But that's all I wanted to say. Have a good day!

[Filtered to 616 Avengers]
If an alternate dimension version of yourself had a child, would you want them to come forward?

Basically, I need you to tell me not to be a chickenshit.

[Filtered to Erik Lensherr]

Hello, sir, my name is Wanda Maximoff. I know you don't know me, but I was hoping we could talk.

Yeah, okay, so maybe it wasn't an actual job offer. What they really wanted was to see my portfolio and have me audition somewhere other than on the street. So maybe...I mean, they thought I was pretty...and they want me to apply for real. So it was like...I don't know...a callback, maybe? I don't know.

I'm a little disappointed but I'm not giving up. A nice lady has offered to help me get a portfolio together. And I'm hoping it all works out like I thought it had to start with. But...that's the way things go, right.

[Filtered against Leo Valdez]

Leo got all mad at me the other night because of it, though. I mean. I think he worries. He knows how freaked out my mom always got about me gaining weight, and I think he thinks that being a model is going to bring all that back. I don't know. Maybe it will.

[Filtered against everyone but Percy Jackson and Harry Potter folks (Leo can read this)]

But...I don't know. Maybe...I don't want to be a model. I mean, my whole life, that's the only thing about me that anyone ever acted like was worth anything. I was Fleur's little sister, a Quarter Veela...and I mean, I hate that. I mean, it's nice to have people tell you that you're pretty all the time...for a while, but then it gets old. I'm...more than that, you know? Maybe I shouldn't go for this at all. Maybe this is just going to make everyone think I'm shallow and stupid. And I know I totally seem that way sometimes but that's just because it's easier. Because I'm not sure who I really am is actually very nice. Or very happy.

Let me see if I have this correct. I'm minding my own business, sleeping out in the grasslands, and something called a Tesseract decided to pull me to this city?

Or should I blame this on some twit making a wish to Prismo?

Ugh, whatever, whoever did this is lame. L-A-M-E

LAME!

This is mindblowing. Of course it had to be in America and not somewhere with any class.

I'm told my wife is here. Pansy, where are you? Everyone else, I'm Blaise Zabini.

Muggle devices are hard to navigate, as well. I can't seem to figure out the speech to text button. It keeps typing in what I assume is Spanish. Could someone point me in the right direction of getting it to display English when I talk into it?

Ladies and gentlemen,

Peter Parker has a job.

I mean, not the other Peter Parker (who also has a job), but this one. ME. I have a job. And yes, this was newsy enough to announce on the network.

And my future boss was kind enough to let me start from Tuesday, which means I'm still in for the inauguration trip, Julie.

Carry on with your day! Or evening! Or night! Well, technically, it's the latter, but --

Okay, I'll just stop talking now.

[Text to Peter Petrelli]

>> I know you're probably working but
>> I wanted to let you know that I'm living with Susan now
>> Flat 1107

SHIELD training bears certain similarities to the early years of my training on Serkonos before I was sent to Gristol to stand before the Heir, though it has the bonus of not having hours of rather stultifying lessons in court etiquette and manners. For my students, this is why your lessons in that subject aren't boring. I refuse to inflict that sort of tedium on other people. Admittedly, I was just a boy when I was learning all of that and what boy doesn't find weapons training far more exciting and interesting than sitting in a classroom?

On a more interesting note, I went to see the movie Les Miserable on the weekend. I wish I could sing half as well as my doppelganger. I've also made a note that a heavy beard and cropped hair doesn't suit me at all.

TEXT TO MAY CASTELLAN:

» It appears I am taking our son to a sporting event on Sunday.
» I have been able to procure tickets to the Patriots/Ravens football game on Sunday night.
» We will be taking the train up Sunday morning and come back very late Sunday night.
» I hope this is a good time for us, and goes some way to repairing relations between Luke and myself.

Oh, please, what is this place? Did the gods bring me here? Those strangely dressed men with their strange weapons blamed the Tess-Tesser- the glowing blue box, but I have no idea how a box could do that, unless the gods were involved.

But why would they choose me?

And what is this place, with these giant towers and the yellow metal boxes racing down the streets? It this Elysium? Am I dead? Surely only the gods are capable of such things as these.

The books were a mistake I believe I am starting to understand the posts I saw from some people wishing that they hadn't watched their program. There are some things I wish I didn't know

[Filtered to Elena Gilbert]
How much truth is there to the legends? Is there some way I can return some of the books I bought Sunday? I'm not enjoying them as much as I thought I would.

[Filtered to Merlin]
You will make yourself available to answer some questions I have for you. Tonight.

[Filtered to Lady Morgana]
My apologies for not attempting to contacting you sooner. Lancelot had told me that you were here but I was wrapped up in my own pursuits. How are you adjusting? Lancelot told me that you join

[Filtered to Lancelot]
I saw where you had registered for the tournament. Would you be interested in training together for it?

>>Honestly, I don't know why I bother.
>>Some people it isn't worth being civil to.
>>I'd rather like to turn her tea into troll bogies, but I'd be no better than she is.

>>Don't suppose you're free for a visit?

While I'm usually used to the rain (New Gotham is notorious for its awful weather, after all), it's the cold I'm not a fan of. Sometimes I feel like I can't even leave the tower because I can't get bundled up enough.

Filter to anyone from a DCU-related universe

I haven't had an opportunity to talk with all of you, so allow me to introduce myself. I'm Barbara Gordon. I'm most recently of New Gotham, apparently from a television show here called Birds of Prey. I've been here in New York since September. I'm happy to answer any questions you have.

Filtered down to anyone from a DCU-related universe who was part of the JLA, JSA, Bat-family, Teen Titans, etc. So, heroes, not civilians or villans.

If any of you are interested in discussing how to possibly resume your former lives or, rather, second lives, I'm happy to discuss. You might have previously known me as Batgirl or Oracle.

Filtered to Dick

That was a hard one to come out and admit, but I suppose it's just on the Internet, isn't it?

( Filtered to Charles Xavier )

Filtered to Sam Merlotte

Hi Sam. Could I have a couple days free? Sunday Monday Tuesday. My present day and place culture class is going to see the inauguration! I want to go. I can work double shifts beforehand or afterward. If that helps. I've never seen a leader sworn in before. It's supposed to be peaceful too. No dead bodies. Thank you, for thinking about it. It's short notice. Shorter if any of us disappear. But I'm coming back, I assume. I'm acting like it.

Filtered to Laura Roslin

Thank you! They were delicious. I enjoyed them. Are you feeling hopeful still? There's a clinic open now. The doctors are from different universes. They could help. I like talking with you.

Filtered to John Crichton & Aeryn Sun

I might be gone a couple days. Washington DC. Presidential inauguration. Have you ever been, John? Will you two be okay without me, while I'm gone? I'll miss you.

Why is human color so important? It's listed as racism, and I've read about human events in the past, but it doesn't explain why racism. Cranial size doesn't correlate to intelligence. Skin color in humans is pigment. I'd understand if humans hated gorillas or chimpanzees or orangutans for being other species, other races. But other humans, for being human? Logic doesn't follow. How are the president's daughters satanic spawn? A series of google searches explained drone strikes, which explains the charge of a murderous bastard [reference: President Barack Obama's mother unmarried at time of birth]. Who prays for more dead soldiers? What did homosexuals ever do to them?

Racism doesn't make sense.

[FILTER: JO | VERONICA]

That awkward moment when you realize you've been here for a full month.

I think I'm starting to go native.

[FILTER: ZOE WASHBURN]

Hi. I know you don't know me, but my name is Sam, and I have a few questions for you. Do you have a second?

I...I can't stop watching.

Magical Trevor.

It's so bizarre that I just can't look away. I think I know all the words now.