The Doorway: a panfandom game

Japan is overwhelming, but also very beautiful, in its own way. However, it's far too crowded, for my tastes.

Mr Howard Stark's speech at the University of Tokyo on Tuesday was well received. Now, I've been fortunate to accompany Mr Stark and Miss Juspeczyk while they visit the sights and go shopping. I should like to attend a Japanese tea ceremony before we leave.

We return on Sunday to Mr Starks' new East End Avenue penthouse, thanks to Master Tony's generosity.

( Private to Miss Angie Martinelli )

( Private to Miss Donna Noble )

Once again, Joan has proven that her instincts are correct. We were right when we selected Clyde to be the pet that we submitted to the contest, and I would like to congratulate our turtle in winning. It was a tight competition, but I thought we had a chance once the parrot started swearing.

I would like to go on record saying I still believe we could have won if we'd gone with my first choice:

Deadpool

Thanks, SWORD, for providing brains. But this experience is so surreal (also, anyone want a scarf; it may be June, but this person knits). That likely comes from not eating a murder victim. She lived a long full life, donated her body to science, and has almost no unfinished business. You know what she does have? The urge to make sure her cats are okay. So that's what I've been doing this afternoon, calling cat shelters. But looking at animals up for adoption online... it's hard not to turn into a cat lady.

So when Giles was going on about opening between opening gates between dimensions, he was all hellbeasts, end of world, terrible demons, and he kinda sorta forgot to mention Captain America and Luke Skywalker.

So hey, I'm Buffy.

There's really nothing like staring down the creepers on the train who think it's cool to try and sneak peeks up a girls' skirt. Yeah... see how much you like it when I eyeball your crotch for three stops straight, perv.

So I've got a job now. That's exciting, really, because not many people get to work with SherLOCK BLOODY HOLMES and WATSON and she's a woman it's so brilliant such interesting people. New York's not nearly as much like the movies make it out to be, but that's to be expected. Now it's just a matter of getting used to knowing that as insignificant as I felt before among all the stars and all the galaxies and all the dimensions in this entropic universe, there's nothing quite like being a fictional character on a television programme. Really puts things in perspective, you know.

Is anyone else having an existential crisis or is it just me? Right. Just me.

Anyway, I'm looking forward to getting to know the city a bit better, so I'd like suggestions. Mostly for food's sake, but I'm open to anything else.

[STEVE UNIVERSE]

Hey, there. I've got a little bit of money, and I'd like to take you shopping for some proper food. Would that be all right with you?

It was kind of nice having people my age around.

Am I the youngest person here? I wonder if I'll age like the Gems do... which is not at all. Am I going to be 13 forever??

For those who know her, I'm sorry to tell you, but Rose Tyler was sent home.

So, I've been here a bit. Long enough to not be so shocked by everything, anyway -- superheroes, though, that's brilliant (and if any of you are single, please, give me a call.) That said, I'm starting to wonder if anyone might be hiring? Before I came here, I was a teacher at Cole Hill Secondary School. Though...looking that up brings up a bit of info about the series I'm apparently [...] from. I mean, it's all accurate, right? Just not real. For anyone but me, at least. Right.

Anyway, point is, I'm a teacher and I like teaching. But I'm good at other things too, so, if anyone happens to like hiring people who are good at stuff, Clara Oswald's the one for you.

With all these republicans hinting at candidacy, can primaries be decided with this sort of democracy?

Hey, is there like somewhere we can go to report people who we are pretty sure are (or are about to become) super villains? Like, I'm not even talking about a cross universe thing. This isn't about the ethics of watching people who are bad news at other points in the multiverse. I don't buy into that crap.

I am talking about Cédric Villani. Like, have you seen this guy?

I'm also willing to accept the fact he might be a Time Lord.

Apparently if you wear horns while you're walking through Times Square today, little children in Iron Man costumes think it's perfectly acceptable to bite, punch and/or headbutt you.

Haven't we moved past the idea that someone can be asking for something based on what they're wearing?

Joke's on him, though. I weigh 2000 pounds. It definitely hurt him more than it hurt me.

So far the tesseract has turned me into Spock (which, all right, admittedly ten year old me thought was the coolest ever and 30+ me pretty much did too), made me about 14, and made me a woman. Meanwhile it seems to have looked me over completely while it handed out Force sensitivity. I have a lightsaber, tesseract. I am ready, why do you hate me?

Director Brand, Danvers, I'm going to be having words with the tesseract on my break - just so you're aware.

Right. I'm perfectly calm, not even a little bit angry, and there's no need to threaten to use a taser on me again. You lot have been saying this isn't a trap and now's your chance to prove it. So, now I just want to know one thing: I'm looking for a big blue police box, so if you've seen it, let me know.

An entire hospital if people just disappears? Well that sounds like the beginnings of a fairly terrible ghost story. I wonder what happened to them. To just disappear overnight...

Filter to Cora

I'm on this evening's train to London; Rogers asked myself and Dugan to take care of a thing for him. I daresay we shan't be more than a day or two, but I'll keep you informed, darling.

Filter to Walter Blythe

How's New York treating you, friend?

Filter to Clara

Hullo. Fancy a cup of tea? Of course, it would have to be in London.

The kind fellows with the organization known as SWORD brought me here. Never really been to New York City, and I must say that it's impressive. Impressively noisy and dirty, impressively full of life. Oh, I say, I should introduce myself. I'm Aziraphale. Pleasure to meet all of you faceless names that I'm yet to see on this curious contraption.

Does anyone know where I might find a good cup of tea?

Alas, I received notification a few days ago that I've a package from the Tesseract. I'm fairly eaten up with curiosity as to what it is, but it will of course have to wait until I am stateside again.

Unless I am able to persuade some lovely soul to mail it to Falsworth Manor, at which point I'll pick it up at my earliest convenience.

Filter to the Paris Crew

Comrades, plans are falling into place. It is looking more and more as if Friday will be the day which we've been waiting so patiently for. There will be a meeting tomorrow afternoon, at the rooms which I am renting during our stay here.

Perhaps this isn't my place, as to this point in my life I was never a SHIELD agent (despite holding some positions of authority within the organization during my older years), but I must say how proud I am to be fighting alongside you all. The work we are doing is quite important, and ensures the safety of millions of people. Do not forget that those who we have set free are looking to us for our guidance and our leadership in the days that come, and we must not fail them, or ourselves.

ETA: Filter to SWORD

I've received notification that a package arrived for me a few days ago, via the Tesseract. I would greatly appreciate it if you would put it into the keeping of Miss Clara Oswald, who will then ensure that I receive it. Thank you.

Oh, I should not have watched that. I should not have watched even an episode of that.

I am completely traumatized, and now I need massive amounts of distraction, or my day is only going to get worse.

Who's willing to distract a very shaky woman who just got a face full of flashbacks labeled as quality entertainment?

FILTERED TO PTYC:

It's with a heavy heart that I have to announce that Mako Mori, our beloved Business Manager, will be leaving us soon. I want to take this moment to wish her a very fond farewell and so much luck in the future. She was with me in the early days after I took over the Youth Centre, and she was such a tremendous help that we would not be where we are without her. I have appreciated her dedication, hard work, and friendship so much that this was a difficult memo to write.

Let's make her last few weeks the best we possibly can!

FILTERED TO MONTY:

There's a bunch of hearings going on. They're on the telly. I'm not sure they're all that interesting. No one seems to be telling anything that isn't already out there on the web.

FILTERED TO 11:

I miss scarf weather. Can we go somewhere a little chilly this weekend?