DEAREST FRIENDS, THE INHABITANTS OF POTTS TOWER:
I needn't provide you with a history lesson regarding the true facts of Thanksgiving; how the sugar was not bountiful, how the pheasant was not fat and the corn, if there was any, was like to be riddled with worms. No. I realize you celebrate, looking back to that time with all the wonder and all the resources the world has to offer you and I cannot fault you in the slightest.
Though I would very much like to fault you for Black Friday. As would, I am sure, your prudish Puritan forebears. If you only knew ...
well, I suppose the point of this missive is to state that you do not know. And in not knowing, you are free to interpret your holiday at will. I have much respect for this, and all the more for you. I am glad to be here. I am glad indeed.
I promise to learn more of you in the coming days and perhaps, by Christmas, we may yet come to an understanding of our place as refugees and the purpose of our presence in this most contemporary of realms. Best wishes on this day. And if you own a car, please do be wary of your surroundings.
There is a man - I assume a man, for his face was covered in a mask - attempting to steal vehicles. As I do not own a vehicle (though I do long to drive one some find day), I do not fully understand the customs of travel via them but breaking windows seems quite harsh.
All in all, I wish you the best. I have my pie and now, I must away.
EVER YOURS,
I.B. Crane