The Doorway: a panfandom game

Uhhhhh did Harry Osborne turn into the bad guy and no one told us? Someone left CNN on in the breakroom and they're saying he's been taken in for questioning.

Filter to Violet Parr

Hey, so. I guess I'm your mentor or something. I'm Johnny.

I don't even have a fucking clue what a mentor is supposed to do. Tell you not to do drugs, probably. Don't do drugs, Violet, they're bad. Bad for you, bad for everyone. Also don't have sex. Unless you want to. But only do it safely. With condoms and shit. And eat your vegetables, because although they look like shit on a plate, they're actually good for you. Unless you boil them all to hell. You do that, they don't have any nutrients and you're eating like you're in England or something.

I'm probably going to suck at this. I'm just saying.

Filter to Pete and Ben (both 616)

So. How do you go about being a mentor?

I miss Kitty.

TEXT TO KITTY PRYDE:

-- So bear with me, here.
-- You're still here, right?
-- And we're still having dinner tonight, right?
-- Because there's a lot of people missing and I want to make sure you're not one of them.







-- Kitty? Hello?









-- Come on, this isn't funny.
-- You're in a meeting, right? For the ESD. That's what it is.

Filtered: Nico Minoru

When are you returning? Gert has left again. And I was not surprised when she left in front of me.

Filtered: Young Avengers & Fantastic Avengers & Aracely

If you would like to watch 2 Fast 2 Furious movies tonight, you are welcome to come over. There is popcorn. The Rungalow is Room 408, Potts Tower, New York.

Whomever thought we could die only once was wrong.

TEXT TO PETER PARKER (MCU):

-- Hey, Pete.
-- So a couple weeks back I got my comic book collection from thd Tesseract.
-- The funny thing about my comic book collection is that when I was a kid, my favorite superhero was Spider-Man.
-- I was Spider-Man like six time for Halloween.
-- I showed 'em to Petey and Ben, wanted to know if you'd like to read 'em, too.

Filter to Fantastic Avengers

Hey, team. So I guess we should talk about what we want to accomplish. But, you know, we're Avengers and believe me that's probably one of the coolest things you can be.

In any case, you know SHIELD's gone, so it's up to all of the teams to sort of step in where we can to take care of the things while they're gone. So we'll go on patrol, see what comes up, fight some bad guys, eat pizza. If you're Starfire, drink mustard. We should also do a little bit of training, see how we do together.

My birthday was in June. Hell. You know, calling a drug "candy" never ends well.

Filter to Peter (616), Ben (616), Clint (EMH)

I tried counting the birds who landed on the building to poop, but I lost count.

Is there a way to make money off of bird shit? Because if there is, I'd be swimming in it.

I mean, we're sure about this information, right?

I'm hungry.

OOC: tw: allusions to prostitution in the comments

Hey, Tesseract, you remember that one time when I mentioned to Pete that it'd be cool if I got my comic book collection and the next day or something there it was?

It'd be fucking badass if my sister would arrive.

It'd be fucking cool as hell if my dad's Pontiac were here.

Filter: Avengers (all)

We have a problem, guys. We went to all the trouble of stopping that truck yesterday and the plutonium is missing. It's gone. And that Russian dude that was ID'd, Aleksei Systevich, he's gone too. I don't think that the fact that they've both turned up missing is a coincidence. We got anyone to listen in whereever you listen to for things like this, to see if he's been spotted?

And can someone meet me at the mansion to re-wrap my bandages? I'm fucking terrible at it. And bring me ice cream since I think Petey's not gonna do it. Unless Petey does it then nevermind. Also some advil. I think advil would be great right now.

Filter to Avengers (all)

Last night I went out on patrol, and instead of running into any Manfredis or whoever they're fighting, I had my ass handed to me by a woman who was being harassed by a gang of about 8 or 10 men. I was going to help her, get her out of there and instead she just idk. You know that movie with the girl who kicked all the ass and at the end of her big fight she's just standing there? IDK Serendipity or something. That's what it was like. Only she didn't know what she was doing, she was fucking terrified and she ran off before anyone could talk to her.

Pete was going to go and see if he could find anything, I don't know if he did or not. I was really close to Marcus Garvey Park on W 123rd. The girl is black, petite, has really short hair, and is beautiful. I mean that's a legit way of describing her, right? I mean it was dark so I didn't get a great look, just enough to know that she was scared at what she was doing, and that she's pretty.

I mean someone who has healing abilities or super strength might be able to subdue her, but for everyone else, I had an overnight at Mt. Sinai and ended up with with a few broken ribs and a concussion, along with a broken nose and a sprained wrist.

TEXT MEANT FOR PETER PARKER (616), ACCIDENTALLY SENT TO MJ WATSON SHORTLY ATER THIS:

-- Hey Petey
-- I'm in the hospital.
-- Don't worry about breaking me out, though, cause it's kinda nice to not move.

TEXT TO KITTY PRYDE SHORTLY ATER THIS:

-- So, I'm at Mount Sinai.
-- And in a lot of pain.

TEXT TO PETER PARKER (616)SHORTLY ATER THIS:

-- Hey Petey
-- I'm in the hospital.
-- Don't worry about breaking me out, though, cause it's kinda nice to not move.

Who: Johnny Storm
When: About 10 p.m., Wednesday, July 9, 2014 (and about eleven that same night)
Where: Harlem; specifically, W 123rd Street and Mt. Morris Parkway
What: Johnny had a run in… with a woman.
Rating: Eh, PG-13 for mentions of violence, injuries, and language
TRIGGER WARNING: Vague mentions of the possibility of rape. And mentions of vomit.

( Moving hurt. Hell, thinking hurt. )

[Johnny Storm]

Hi. Um. I don't think we've met.

But hi. I have a question for you.

Hey anyone wanna hire a pizza guy who used to be in SHIELD but before that he was a pizza guy? I mean, he's real cool and delivers pizzas like a pro. IDK what he did at SHIELD but he was recruited so obviously someone liked him. He probably has a wife and kids or a cat or something to take care of and I don't think that delivering pizzas has benefits and what if he has to go to the dentist?

TEXT TO KITTY PRYDE:

-- Hey so I did tell you I'm on a boat, right?
-- Sailing right across the Pacific.
-- We'll be in LA in a few days.
-- Also don't be mad at Happy, he thinks you don't like him.
-- I was being a jerk, sort of.
-- But we're good now.

Does anyone know where Bruce Banner is?

My name is Johnny Storm and I'm an idiot.

Added about an hour later...

Good job, Happy. You sucessfully almost hacked someone. He's almost a damn computer genius.

Filter to Steve Rogers (EMH)

Yeah so don't go out. Just don't do it, man. Assholes, everywhere. Had some asshat throw an entire pie at me and it's like Jesus fuck, dude that was a waste of a perfectly good apple pie. He also called me Captain Treason because that is what counts as smart now. They'd probably try to maul you because you just ooze patriotism and shit.

So are giant mongeese... mongooses... normal for this universe? Because I saw one last night. I mean, is the Tesseract fucking with us again?

Anyone want to play hangman?