The Doorway: a panfandom game

I can't say aquariums are the first things that pop into my head when I think about decorating my bedroom. It all looks really similar to expensive though. I'm not sure I even know how to take care of fish, so any tips on what I'm dealing with now would be helpful.

[MARIA HILL (MCU)]

Any word on the enhanced we encountered?

[PEGGY CARTER]

Well, most of us made it back in one piece. Barton was hit, but it sounds like he'll make a full recovery. We got the sceptre back, and Strucker's in custody. [...] Whatever HYDRA was doing, it meant experimenting on humans -- we came across two enhanced people over there. I don't think it had anything to do with Erskine's formula, but I could be wrong.

TEXT TO BETTY ROSS:

-- Sorry I've been aw
-- Hey, next time I run away to the middle of nowhere, maybe the Faro
-- Remember that Save the Whales, Ban the Males T-shirt you made me w
-- I'm a little tempted to go on a working vacation.

[Steve Rogers (MCU)]

So you know. I read this study about drinking coffee. Apparently it's really good for your skin. As seeing as that's so important to you, I thought maybe we could drink some, sometime.

Ah, travel stories. I remember this one time, when we were at Harvard, Bruce and I decided to take the bus to New York City for a weekend. It's not a far trip, it's pretty scenery -- and it beats trying to drive into the city.

So everything was fine -- until this person gets on the bus with half a dozen balloons, including a motion-activated foil balloon that played "Happy Birthday" whenever it was tapped.

Which was always. Because we were on a fucking bus.

Eventually the driver made the person lock the balloons in the bathroom, but every time the door open, it was more 8-bit birthday wishes.

Not ideal.

So! Does anyone else have a crazy-annoying travel story? I want to know who can beat my balloons!

[Bruce Banner]

I'd ask you if you remembered that story, but I can't imagine you could forget it. Unless you've like, repressed it.

How does this Tesseract work, exactly? Do we know much about it?

To any female scientists and engineers on the network.

I've been working with Stark Industries for their upcoming Stark Expo. MIND has taken over part of the pavilion and will be promoting the work and contributions of women in our field. If you have an interest in developing something for the Expo, please contact myself or Bennett Halverson. While it might seem like a long way off there is quite a bit that needs to be done beforehand.

[Bucky (MCU)]

You know it will become a little difficult to have a standing opening on Wednesdays. Despite the rumors I can't actually eat an entire pizza by myself.

I'm wondering if I should put odd weather to the list or if that's normal here. And if I should be more, or less, at ease with how very little surprises me anymore.

Saw this little guy outside DavidsTea this morning. I feel like we should probably just make this day some kind of international holiday.

TEXT TO BETTY ROSS:

-- Hey.
-- Are you hungry?

Ah, mornings. Dragging yourself out of bed splashing yourself with water and coffee. But for me the worst park is sinking in to an hour of crowded subway platforms and pushy people to bring you from where you want to be to where you have to be.

But the next time you're stuck on a subway seat between two jerkbags who are saving room for cats just remember: You could be a Female Western Gray Whale. Their commute is something like 14,000 miles and takes 172 days. So maybe having to wait a few extra minutes for the next C train isn't all that bad after all.

This is incredibly cool.

(If a depressing reminder that I live in a tree desert, and two of the only examples for blocks around are the insipid, ubiquitous, sometimes-fetid-always-disappointing Pyrus calleryana. Not that I do now or ever will advocate for anything that might appropriately be labeled eco-terrorism, but if anyone wanted to implement a wide-scale extermination of that species, I think they would find it an uncomplicated operation, and also that everything they might need is conveniently located in my supply closet. They should also be willing to discuss my proposal for the wholesale elimination of the female specimens of Ginkgo biloba.)

It's a beautiful day to get outside. First one to bring me photographic proof of a misidentification gets a muffin.

If I didn't already have a robust appreciation for the Do Not Disturb feature on my phone, I certainly would now.

Serious question: when you tweet at someone whom you believe to be trundling through the city at several times his usual size and several times his normal baseline of irritability, do you expect an answer? Do you think you're being helpful? Do you think perhaps he hasn't noticed? Do you think you're going to be the one who finally comes up with the pun he hasn't heard before? I'm curious: what's the end game?

Because - here's a tip - even if he wasn't about to spend his afternoon submitting YouTube takedown notices, the odds that he would appreciate any of that are vanishingly slim.

[Bruce Banner (MCU)]

My flight gets in tonight around 8:00pm. Think you can meet me at the airport?

To: Betty Ross
From: banner@protonmail.ch
Subject: RE: Flu?

( you have 1 new message )

To: banner@protonmail.ch
From: Betty Ross
Subject: Flu?
Attachment: H3N2H7N9.doc CDC.doc

( you have 1 new message )

FILTERED TO THOR:

People have started to fall into comas from this flu. So far, I feel fine. What about you?

FILTERED TO SCIENCE LADIES:

Any of you ladies feeling down and out?

To: Betty Ross
From: banner@protonmail.ch
Subject: [no subject]
Date: 02:47 03-05-2015

( you have 1 new message )

There are important news events happening in the world, and all the Bugle can report on is a Spider-Man conspiracy?

Don't they know Orlando Bloom punched Justin Bieber?

[Johnny Storm]

Hi. Um. I don't think we've met.

But hi. I have a question for you.

Does anyone know where Bruce Banner is?