The Doorway: a panfandom game

Well that was an experience. Let's go ahead and add 'Watching show I apparently come from' on a list of things I'd never thought I'd say.

Filter: Kol

How are you feeling?

Filter: Marcel

Hi.

Filter: Caroline & Damon

So what's the word on Elena?

Everything about today sucks. Your coffee's overpriced, and it's not even that good. People are assholes. Does no one say hello here? Your snow is slush and makes everyone drive even worse, which I didn't think was possible at all. I've got this pounding headache, and your chemists charge an arm and a leg for something like aspirin. Somebody just stake me already.

FILTERED TO SIMON TAM, TONY GATES:

Probably useless, but do you guys need anyone who cleans up the shit you don't want to? I can do paperwork and other things. I'm just used to working in that environment, and I thought it would be better to be around people who aren't weirded out by the thought of a vampire wheeling their granny around.

I don't have a CV here, but I've a show, and you can see that I actually had the job I'm asking for in it.

[Peter Quill]

Do you often find yourself at the aid of people in distress? I'm told I have a habit of falling right into the Gundark's nest. Actually You do have a way with people.

I'm afraid my Force senses seem to be off. No matter where I go, everything seems to be dimmer. That can't be right. We're not facing an apocalyptic takeover, right? Will someone come and check this lamp for me? I never thought I'd miss droids.

[CHILDREN OF THE ESD + bbBarnes]

Someone needs to explain to me this

"Mmmmmm Whatcha say" bullshit.

TEXT TO JANET VAN DYNE:

-- Hey, you feeling any better?

Super important life question.

If your husband who is only your husband because you did something stupid in Atlantic City just vanishes before you decide if you really want to stay married, are you still married?

Or is that like an auto annulment? Or are you pretty much just married forever now?

This really sucks I can't believe he's

Well that game Sunday sure were something, wasn't it? No Jets vs Colts, but folk'd be hard pressed to outdo Namath and Unitas.

[Filtered to SHIELD: Asset Retrieval]

Alright you lot, if we have got all our ducks lined up, what say we head on up north where it's even colder and pay old mom a visit?

FILTERED TO SPN PEOPLE + VERONICA:

I'm feeling better.

Hawke has been using some of his magic to heal the damage. It isn't permanent, but it's maintenance until we find the right solution.



More importantly: Dean. I heard you this morning. Are you all right?

I never quite know what to say on this network. Googling it, suggests I make an observation about pajamas.

They're clothes.

Hey this is easy. Either I'm pretty good at this or there's a lesson in crowdsourcing the internet for ideas. Maybe next I'll get one of those twitter things.

[Filtered to Mona Vanderwaal, Light Yagami (separately)]

What makes you think you've got what it takes to work for SHIELD?

[Filtered to Natasha Romanova]

So I've been chasing a HYDRA money trail for a few months now and seem to hit a stonewall around Chișinău. Wouldn't happen to know anyone interested in putting some leather to pavement and scoping it out, would you?

[Filtered to Cassie Sandsmark, Daisy Johnson]

We've been dancing round it for a while now, but you wanna help, there's more that can be done than hand out blankets after the fact.

[Filtered to SHIELD: Counter-Intel + Sharon Carter (MCU)]

Alright, we've go an in at the Voice who will publish an article on our mark when I give her the tip.

Sullivan, I'll forward you Jess' cover if you want to get it written up.

[Filter: Nick (MCU)]

Шляпы и колпаки являются проблематичными.



As is the fact that the photo we're working from is... how many years old?

I had a dream last night that myself and two friends -- Pepper Potts, I think, and I’m pretty sure the second friend was just Henry Winter from The Secret History. Anyway for whatever reason we were both submitting portfolios to get into this elite art school in New York City. Pepper and I both made it in but Winter -- the most annoying, self assured and pretentious of all -- did not.

Anyway, while Pepper and I were waiting to meet with the board for a portfolio review, we sat in the hallway with one of the other accepted applicants: Channing Tatum. Yes, just Channing Tatum. I was looking through pictures of his painting with him, and I came across one of tigers and cigarettes. I asked him what the significance of the painting was -- why tigers and cigarettes -- what did it mean, what was it about.

And he said: “Bears and cigarettes. I just didn’t feel like drawing bears.”

Pretentious friend was furious at this, and the fact Channing Tatum had been accepted over him.

And then I woke up.

( Delivery for the Eleventh Doctor )

I always thought I'd enjoy the city that never sleeps. But, man this place sucks.

Because, yeah, who doesn't like to watch themselves get kidnapped by crazy witches, and know that there's nothing you can do to change it. Or save your guys. This whole place is a damned nightmare.

filtered to Han

So Valentine's Day? Any ideas?

GARRETT HAWKE

Hey, my name's Sam. You helped out my friend Cas, and I just wanted to say thank you. I really appreciate it.

VERONICA

I'm sorry about Logan.

( Delivery for Basil Hallward )

Okay, all that football shit finally is over, we can all stop talking about it and maybe skip it forever.

Now when does House of Cards come back?

To the 18 people who sent this to me because you thought it "seemed like [my] sense of humor," you're all assholes.

But you're not wrong.

WHO: Rose Hathaway + Dimitri Belikov
WHERE: Streets of New York
WHEN: Late evening Wednesday February 4th
WHAT: Rose bumps into Dimitri and they finally talk about stuff
WARNINGS: Fighting and a whole lot of the f word.
STATUS: Complete.



( Rose had avoiding Dimitri down to a science. )

( Text Message to Lissa )

» Hey
» Don't wait up
» I'm going to be out all night

Who: Thorin Oakenshield, Kíli & Tauriel
When: Monday, February 2
Where: Sam’s
What: Most awkward conversation ever.
Rating: G?

( 'Your mother looked at your father like that.' )

Private to James Potter

So, you say we knew each other before, right?

Ah. Yes.

I will admit, this is the most accommodation I've been afforded without some service asked for on my part. I am grateful, but wary.

I can't tell what's worse: realizing that my entire life being a television show actually makes perfect sense and explains a lot, or finding out that it is literally all about Rachel Berry being better than everyone else. I'm a secondary character in my own life!

I guess that explains why everyone sings more than I do. Or why everyone bursts into song in public in the first place.

» So I kind of got an unexpected invitation with a +1.
» And I think it's something you might enjoy going to.
» Or at least find something about it to make fun of, so that's another kind of enjoyment.

My mom would have been 64 today.That's so hard for me to wrap my mind around. I still miss her.

( Filtered to Sam Winchester )

( Filtered to Richard Castle )