vallo

I was told that I did not pass a "vibe check" today as I gave my advanced students a pop quiz. As they take said quiz, I have decided to take this as the compliment that I have to assume it was not meant to be.

CALEB

Do you have a moment?

So. let’s say you were taken in by the woman who had your birth parents killed and then she raised you to be the very best time traveling assassin/fixer there is, and now you’ve got a tiny tot and you're trying to leave wet work in the past. What the hell do you put on your resume? I’ve never looked for a proper job before. It’s a ridiculous farce, isn’t it? Most of my references are either family now or very very dead.

Actually. Anyone have a band in need of a drummer? One getting paying gigs, not just sitting around in someone’s garage sweating bullets over their equipment, that is. If you have a drummer but they’re mediocre, consider punting them to the curb in favour of yours truly? I look really good in thigh high fishnets and tiny shorts, if that helps my cause any.

Darlings, if you'll indulge me in a poll. Say one had a blood pool--which is exactly what it sounds like a pool of blood, and one had to submerge oneself in said blood pool, would it be preferable for the blood to be warm or cold? Alternative answers regarding temperature are accepted, of course, this doesn't have to be an either or, but the existence of the blood pool is mandatory.

And I ask this because by the "what's mine is yours" property, as Vax is the owner of a blood pool, I now own a blood pool and the question has been the source of riotous debate between us, second only to the great "onyx, panther, obsidian, and midnight are all the same color" debacle, the likes of which we still cannot discuss to this day.

All questions regarding the function of the blood pool may be directed to my beloved, as I would have preferred a sauna or a salt cave, however please do go relatively easy on him because he did come to the store this morning with a lavender latte and also, look at him.

Also, your skincare tip of the day is to apply moisturizer in circular motions, upwards and and away from the center of your face. Skincare products are applied lightest to heaviest! Your magic tip is that when crafting potions, follow the recipe as written--diced goldenseal operates very differently from chopped or minced goldenseal and the line between simmer and boiling is fine.

Help me out. Yes or no on these boots?

I am not surprised that he left, I am surprised he left without causing a scene. But now I am missing our random conversations.

So, random question to start more conversations: Are you a cat or a dog person?

Can't sleep. Listening to music. Drinkin' and smokin'. Thinkin'. Been doing a lot of that. Sometimes I think my head might explode from all of it. Anyway, hey to any other night owls that may be up.

I'm Alex. Keep a distance. I don't trust any of you.



You're not supposed to eat in these places, right? Fuck, I need Dawes I need Dar But I could use a bagel, so. It's free, right? Where's that.

My sense of direction has been questionable at times, but I didn't think it was possible to have landed so far off from my intended destination. Fortunately, I did not have to wander too long before I was greeted by a delightful young man who informed me of the situation I find myself in and even helped me find lodgings for the foreseeable future.

This place seems as good as any for a fresh start.

tw: discussion of pregnancy in comments

Things I didn't miss:

Nearly burning down the house trying to make a Thanksgiving dinner.

Things I am missing:

Black Friday. I need new boots and do not want to pay full retail thank you very much.

((pls to ignore the tag dump on this))