vallo

You know, one of the great things about being married is learning new things about your partner, even after we've been together for years.

Like today I found out that Teddy uses a giant magical sword (a sword that that a prophecy proclaimed that whoever could pull this sword from a stone [I know, I know] would become the ruler of space) as a table that he puts his cereal bowl on.

It's things like this that keep the spark alive.

TEXTS TO BILLY

-- Babe.
-- [image attached]

I just finished inventorying the entire store so if you're looking for a certain type of game, I have so much useless information in my head and would love to word vomit all of my opinions. And now, in the interest of sparking debate, I present the following questions:

Red vines vs. Twizzlers, which red licorice adjacent candy reigns supreme? (there is a right choice, don't listen to Teddy about this one thing, everything else you can listen to him)

If Halloween centered around a meal, like Thanksgiving or Christmas, what would that 'traditional' meal look like?

What type of movies are more inherent to Halloween: scary, horror movies, or corny spooky movies?

If you had to eliminate one candy forever from Halloween, what would it be and why? (and why is the answer the crappy black and orange wrapped candy that no one really knows the name of?)

Finally, and this is a pretty specific one: do we think that the Elder Beasts that hang out around my mom's our spooky cabin will allow me to decorate them, and if so, what should they wear? Do I lean into spooky? Do I do something ironic? They're sentient, but really only come to life when someone comes to the cabin and I think they'd basically do what I ask? Hard to say, really.

UUUUGGGHHHHH.

Is Vallo just saying I don’t get to have any best friends my age or something? Why are you like this, Vallo??

T

--Morning <3
--Can you pull over for a sec?

I need someone else to confirm the gang of penguins that graffitied the alley next to the angry pixies coffee shop. Because, what.

I'll take Sentences I thought I'd never type for 400.

Teddy

I have a proposition.

Hello. I may have found something. I have been attempting to follow a trail ever since Eliphas was attacked by these anxiety-inducing beasts. Not even my best tracking forms were helping much until today, when I got wind in the swampier section of the forest. There are caves here, a whole system of them, and they are extensive enough that it would not be wise to go in alone.

Fair warning, I do not know how many may be inside or if there is a master creature to contend with once we are there. That said, I am certain others will not mind the risk if it means finding the creatures responsible for hurting our people and personally see to it that it does not happen again.

[the cave's coordinates]

Text to: <3 Space King First/Eighth of His Name Bear Teds Teddy Hulkling YA Hot Guy With Abs

--Extra long run today?
--Not complaining, take your time, I don't care, do what you need.
--Or did you get caught up walking an entire nursing home across the street?
--But also
--I'm freezing
--Yes in August
--I don't make the rules

Just to make sure I have this straight: I'm in a place that has drawn people in from all across the multiverse, as well as having a native population. And then on top of that some people who were brought here are now in a horror series on tv, playing characters in roles that they didn't necessarily choose? And there's no way for me to connect with them?

Where's Wanda? Is she alright?

Are the people in this television show alright? Even if... they die?

TEXT TO BILLY

» Hey
» Where are you?

Please for the love of whatever fucking god actually listens tell me that I'm not the only one seeing a FACE on the FUCKING MOON because frankly I've had enough MOON BULLSHIT to last several lifetimes

and also would prefer my loss of mind to take this kind of shape because FUCK me.

FRIENDS/FAMILY OF BILLY & TEDDY

Good morning!

Billy and I wanted to invite you all to the courthouse on July 27 at 4PM for a wedding. Our wedding, obviously. It's not our first by my memory, but it will be his, so we're making a bit of an event of it. And if you'd like to join for dinner on us afterward, we'll be doing so at Five Sails.

Billy has decreed we'll also be doing a Smash Bros tournament after the dinner at our place, if you want to join that, too. There will probably be after-dinner pizza.

Anyway, this isn't the most traditional of wedding invitations, but we're not the most traditional of guys. We hope to see you all there to celebrate with us!

[FILTERED TO DEFENSE TEAMS/RESERVES/TECH/RESEARCH]

It's that time again. Don't make any plans for the 15th. This one is going to take some pre-planning and it involves everyone in Defense.

( Tandem Bicycle Games )

You know, I had just about forgotten how nice summer vacation actually felt until this past month since the semester ended. I was looking forward to it, but apparently was a bit surprised to find that it's just as nice in college as it is in high school. I'm looking forward to more classes in a way, but I'm also really enjoying this extra time to play video games.

Unrelated, but if Billy and I hosted board game nights, maybe once or twice a month, would people be interested in that? Something regular with an assortment of people, everyone bringing snacks to share, that kind of thing. You should say yes, because we have so many games and are delightful to hang out with.

Oh, and obviously: happy Pride, folks. I know the month is almost out, but I'm looking forward to being even more gay than usual this weekend.

Thank you, loyal Cleric of Me, for the book of names. I'm going to say one more time that THEY WERE PLACEHOLDERS...but I guess you guys are right, I can't just be naming people Miffany.

[Filtered to El]
Feeling ready for exam week?
[/filter]

[Filtered to Mr. Laurence]
Hey Mr. Laurence, just wanted to let you know I've got exams next week, but after that I'll be available for more sheep work for the summer if you need it. I'll still have my Thursday and Friday afternoon and all day Saturday/Sunday shifts at Wicked, but Monday through Wednesday are wide open and Thursday and Friday I'll be available all morning.
[/filter]

Okay, so I have a small problem. Literally.

El and I made this map we’ve been calling Vallo Village, right? And we got Billy to do some magic to make it look a little more realistic, which worked, but maybe worked a little too well. Or not exactly. Ms. Maximoff says it seems like sympathetic magic from Vallo got involved because I based some of the map on an old part of the city.

Anyway the point is I just got a prayer? from the village? for help from mighty adventurers?.

It looks like my campaign is happening whether it’s finished or not, so basically I really need some people to come down and save a tiny village from [...] okay I can’t type it, wtf. Call it certain peril. I need people to go into the map and save the village from certain peril. I can’t tell you what the peril is for some reason, probably the magic again, but the peril is bad and it’s going to ruin the lives of all these people who were supposed to just be fictional and now are real.

So, uh…who wants to be an adventurer? Ms. Maximoff says she can work with the magic that’s affecting the map using my extra miniatures, if we can get people to volunteer to be bound to them for a little bit. You’ll just have to kind of be a character while you’re in there - you’ll have whatever powers the miniature’s class comes with, and you should probably come up with a name.

Anyone? Please, I know this sounds stupid, but that little town is a real little town now, and they need our help.

In case anyone's wondering, the cute little bone-eating creatures are still around. I might know this from personal experience, so maybe just keep on keeping an eye out? They really have no right to be so adorable.





Oh but I still have all my bones! Stop panicking, Billy.

I figured I should make some kind of... announcement about it, I suppose, but I am planning from retiring from the Looking Glass Tea. Most of you know it was inherited by my ex? late? former spouse and then it was passed down to me. I'm happy to hand the title over to any Outlander who is interested in owning it (it did belong to an Outlander originally to begin with), but if no one has any interest then I will seek out a Vallo commercial realtor to help me sell it.

My focus is going to mostly be on the DOA magic department and family. I don't need the extra responsibilities.

WILD FOLKS ONLY

So, what do you all think?