vallo

Wow, look, I once again just found some random stuff in my stuff this morning when I woke up, how very strange and coincidental:

- a set of dice, I think? One of them looks like a dice, but the rest are interestingly shaped *
- a marker that says COPIC on it *
- an eyepatch *
- just a fuck ton of daggers that I'm pretty sure are your make, Fen *
- a little friendship looking bracelet *
- a book that I think might be in Zemnian, Caleb *
- several sets of keys that can probably be identified by keychain *
- two different chapsticks, both vanilla latte flavored
- a black bucket hat that says "Raccoon Whisperer" on it
- a nearly empty pot of what I assume is body glitter (this is becoming tradition and makes me think younger me should have had more access back home)
- one black fingerless glove
- jar of crunchy peanut butter that might just be from our kitchen, now that I think about it
- a sewing kit with all the black thread missing, apologies
- a rainbow scrunchie
- two empty flasks this year, oh ho
- a belt that isn't one of my many belts

There also are a number of items here that I recognize from a certain shop. I will return them to you, my glorious fiance, when I bring you lunch.

Anyway, I do apologize--my fingers were incredibly sticky as a teenager due to a slew of father-based issues that we don't have to get into right now. If any of the above sounds like it belongs to you, let me know and I'll get it to you, alongside my deepest apologies and an offer for a round somewhere, because wow.

[ooc note - if an item is marked by * then it has been volunteered by someone, otherwise feel free to claim any of the other items! also poke me if you'd like to add anything to the list.]

These new teenagers we have are terrible at crime. I had another attempted pickpocketing in New Asgard this morning, and it was the sloppiest damned lift I've seen in years. What are the thiefmakers teaching them these days? Go home, practice on the dummy with the bells until you can do it without a jingle and try again.

Alright I've wandered about and remembered a bit more. I have missed the food. And the lack of horse shit on the street. And I suppose all the layabouts living on my train.

Or at least I would've missed those things if I remembered this place yesterday. Anyway, let's not talk about the eye patch, alright? I've felt sorry for myself enough for one day. Come by the club for a drink on me. Or a punch if that's more your style. I doubt I'll be here long enough for the matches to roll around.

I awakened this morning to discover that my husband is thirteen years older and has no recollection of Vallo. Is anyone experiencing similar difficulties?

I am not from a world with things like high school and pep rallies (this is something I just learned about, in fact, and am certain I would have absolutely hated every second of it as a teen), so I didn't know what prom was until it was explained to me and hey, guess what. We're having a prom for so-called grown ups.

So: as long as we aren't displaced in time or space or fighting monsters, anyone 18+ is invited to adult prom on June 10, the theme being Under the Sea, which I was told is one of a handful of popular themes for these kinds of events. All proceeds from ticket costs will be going to the youth center, as well as any added donations and such at the event itself. The usual suspects will be there: good food, open bar, music, and other surprises.

There will be a contest for best Proprom ProposalPr Promsal Promposal to go along with this. This is another thing I had never heard of, but here we are, learning things together. If you make a bit of a fun fuss asking your date to prom with you, record it, send it to vvessar@vcyc.org, and there will be votes during the event on the best promposal. The couple/pair/duo that wins will get bragging rights and a weekend package for two at Galdin Quay.

All right, questions? I'll try to answer them or make something up. Otherwise, hope you'll be there.

So. let’s say you were taken in by the woman who had your birth parents killed and then she raised you to be the very best time traveling assassin/fixer there is, and now you’ve got a tiny tot and you're trying to leave wet work in the past. What the hell do you put on your resume? I’ve never looked for a proper job before. It’s a ridiculous farce, isn’t it? Most of my references are either family now or very very dead.

Actually. Anyone have a band in need of a drummer? One getting paying gigs, not just sitting around in someone’s garage sweating bullets over their equipment, that is. If you have a drummer but they’re mediocre, consider punting them to the curb in favour of yours truly? I look really good in thigh high fishnets and tiny shorts, if that helps my cause any.

I went to the cellar with a few adequate enough bottles from local Vallo vineyards to attempt the beginning of restocking what I had absconded with from myself and ( cut for image! )

Thank you, Vallo. Several bottles include good years of Solvia Groves Diamond Plum Wine as well as some rice wine from Rosohna that I have not had since dropping here three years ago, and so I am pleased. I am also changing the physical locks and the wards. Perhaps it is time for heightened spellwork, to protect against myself. Caleb, I need all of our oil and any unenchanted rod we have hidden away. And Gilmore, fair warning, I am coming to buy all of your incense and string.

Jacob and Serefin

Fuckingfuckfuckedfuckstick

They said we can talk to you.

And I wouldn't be able to forgive myself if I didn't

Don't go and get the me you know, that fucks things up if we talk to each other--something something I don't fucking know time travel bullshit.

Anyway. Hey.

[OOC - Please note that in any visuals, Essek has longer hair and an eyepatch over his left eye with visible scarring on that side of his face/ear/head k ty bye.]

This is so awkwa Figured out time travel, but did not plan how to

Hello. It feels odd to introduce myself as many of you already know me, but I am Essek Widogast and I'm here with Caleb (also) Widogast. If my husband's perfect recall can be relied upon, which I am willing to stake most everything on it, the versions of us that you know normally should still be deep within the Aeor that was brought to Vallo, being very much themselves while surrounded by ancient Exandrian magic and technology.

Which is to say, and I'm doing a poor job of getting to the point, we are from a different timeline and time. A few hours ago, we were in 2033 within a branch of the future that is hopefully not your own. The Temporal Concurrence and the aligning of the leylines does, it seem, allow for some otherwise so-called impossible magic when one(s) puts many months of work into entirely too many sleepless nights their wizard mind(s) to it.

I cannot promise to keep a long story short as there are many moving parts and I tend to be accidentally verbose in the best of times, but I think many of you may remember the attack from Interitus that happened in August of 2021. He was not as gone as we had all hoped and is now wreaking havoc upon my and Caleb's timeline. Thanks to the concurrence and the influx of magic, our intel is advising that he is planning on ascending beyond his current form into something akin to godhood. Should he do so, his powers will be made more or less limitless and there will be no stopping him from traveling freely within timelines to destroy every version of Vallo, as has been his will all along. Our version has just been practice for him.

As for why we have broken through literal time and space to visit the past, we are seeking aid. This has already been discussed with the DOA, but there are a few things that we are here for specifically.

First, Interitus is using a simulacrum of sorts as a power focus, which has allowed him to bide his time in our world and eventually build up enough power in secret to take over. We believe that this simulacrum had already arrived in March of 2023--in February, specifically. We do not know where, but our hope is that you fine people will be able to locate and destroy it, specifically at the height of the concurrence to not give away our plans.

Second, Caleb and I are in search of a very specific tome from the Great Library. We unfortunately do not have access to the Library in our time as you do now, but we believe that the tome we are looking for has information regarding locating the object needed to pierce through Interitus's magical defenses. If any librarian friends are willing to volunteer to help with that, as we do need this before we return to our time tomorrow, it would be greatly appreciated.

Finally, and I realize that this is the largest ask of them all, a vision from one of the Prigany psychics has shown us that there are specific people in the future that aid in the efforts. Our understanding is that these people come to us from your timeline and travel to our own. We have a list of those people, who I will be filtering separately with more information. Please know there is no expectation. We are not here to force anyone to help, regardless of psychic visions.

This is long and a great deal of information for a Monday, I understand. Caleb and I are here to answer any questions that we can--at least those questions that do not pose more harm to the timelines than our being here already might.

FILTER TO AURORA MORNINGSTAR, BILLY KAPLAN, BO DENNIS, COBB VANTH, DANIEL ARLINGTON, GALADRIEL HIGGINS, GANSEY, GLADIO AMICITIA, IRIS AMICITIA, KATOU YUE, KELLACH DONNALLEN, KRATOS, LAN XICHEN, LILA PITTS, LYDIA MARTIN, ORYM, OSTYIA RABALSKA, REMUS LUPIN, ROGIER, SAM WILSON, SARA LANCE, STEVE HARRINGTON, TALLY CRAVEN, TENNAL HALKANA, THOM SUMMER, TYLER LOCKWOOD, VEX'AHLIA + CALEB WIDOGAST

( OOC cut because I know this is getting long I AM SORRY. )

Darlings, if you'll indulge me in a poll. Say one had a blood pool--which is exactly what it sounds like a pool of blood, and one had to submerge oneself in said blood pool, would it be preferable for the blood to be warm or cold? Alternative answers regarding temperature are accepted, of course, this doesn't have to be an either or, but the existence of the blood pool is mandatory.

And I ask this because by the "what's mine is yours" property, as Vax is the owner of a blood pool, I now own a blood pool and the question has been the source of riotous debate between us, second only to the great "onyx, panther, obsidian, and midnight are all the same color" debacle, the likes of which we still cannot discuss to this day.

All questions regarding the function of the blood pool may be directed to my beloved, as I would have preferred a sauna or a salt cave, however please do go relatively easy on him because he did come to the store this morning with a lavender latte and also, look at him.

Also, your skincare tip of the day is to apply moisturizer in circular motions, upwards and and away from the center of your face. Skincare products are applied lightest to heaviest! Your magic tip is that when crafting potions, follow the recipe as written--diced goldenseal operates very differently from chopped or minced goldenseal and the line between simmer and boiling is fine.

[GROUP TEXT MESSAGE TO DIEGO, EVIE, SEREFIN, JACOB, CATRA, & VAX]

» 999wñn
» This is what I get for going to prenatal yoga!!
» Why is childbirth so gross someone tell me

» and also maybe come give me a ride to the hospital
» Cheers

Alright, so here's the thing. I've been here a fucking second now and I've got my people, but there's a lot of you people out there that I'm damn curious about. And, you know what, no matter how long you've been squatting here, be it fucking forever or you got here yesterday, you are damn curious about some people, too. So it's time for a drinking game, just without the drinking unless you are drinking on this weird exchange of a Da'leysen afternoon, in which case, fucking great, you're my kind of people.

Anyway, the game is simple. Point out something that you're curious about the person, then follow it up with a hearty what the fuck is up with that. (Don't actually have to say that, but it's highly encouraged and you're open to judgement if you don't.)

For example, someone could look at me and go: You're green, asshole. What the fuck is up with that? And then I'd answer.

And that's the game. Real fucking simple.

Also, I don't fucking know everyone around, so feel free to chime in so other folks can reply to you and get nosy. It's a gods damn free for all, okay. You reply, people ask questions, you ask questions, just fucking ask questions alright, go.

FRIENDS

I wasn't sure if this was a thing that I was going to bring up, but it feels almost weirder to not say something so I'm just going to say it and we (I) can feel better and move on.

( Cut for spoilers for CRC1/LOVM in case people are worried about that! )

Anyway, that's all. It just felt weird keeping that quiet, so now you all know.

That taken care of, I know it's Sunday, but I'm feeling like I could use some getting out time so drink and food tab is on me if you join me at the Quills tonight. Aiming for a No Hangover Potion Monday, but the company is welcome.

Thank you, Vallo, for four months of exile.

Anyone want to give me the Spark Notes version of what I've missed since the end of September?

Hell of a time, yes? You are all welcome to the wine in the cellar for the foreseeable future, though it will need to be during the operating hours of the Underground.

But if you don't drink, like certain knife-throwing fathers-to-be that I know, you can go wish Vax a happy birthday before he forgets it's his birthday.

JACOB AND EVIE.

We can talk about it. Or we can continue to brush it under the rug and move on. I do think you know what my preference would be.

[FILTERED TO EVIE, SEREFIN, DIEGO, VAX, OSTYIA, LILA, ELLA, SARA, VI]

Right so, now that I'm not nursing a busted head and my shoulder survived fight club, I think it's safe to extend you all an invitation to an epic night of laser tag. I won that charity auction thing a while back and then immediately got beat up by mushrooms so I had to wait on this. Anyway, it's only for 10 people so consider yourselves very special. Thinking I'll set it up for Wednesday night if no one has any complaints. Could wait for the weekend but I'm an impatient prat. Let me know if you can or can't go so I can harass you one way or the other. Cheers.

I'm going to have to just go ahead and purchase one of those fancy espresso machines for anyone who has assisted me with my return to Vallo, because at this rate I'm never going to be able to afford coffees for everyone who has gotten me back into my various locked accounts.

I'm very sorry. We didn't have computers where I'm from. We had guards, and you could usually just kill those when you wanted past them. We're all learning together.

I hope everyone had a holiday filled with cheer and plenty of time spent with loved ones, and even tolerated ones, and that no one fell afoot of mushroom mischief. Now! Let's talk the undead. Has anyone here got a specialty?