vallo

HELLO THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT PIECE OF INFORMATION YOU WILL EVER READ IN YOUR SHORT TINY LIVES

LASZLO CRAVENSWORTH AKA JACKIE DAYTONA AKA JACK THE RIPPER HAS BEEN TAKEN FROM ME BY WINGED DEVILS

(not the sexy scrumptious kind of Mr. Lucifer)
(unless this is Mr. Lucifer playing a very fun game in which case you cheeky horny little fox)

THIS IS VERY SAD FOR ME AND I WILL ACCEPT ANY AND ALL SUPPORT AS I WAIL AND MY BOSOM HEAVES

also Nandor and Gizmo are COMPLETELY IGNORING MY WAILS FUCKING USELESS I TELL YOU

FILTERED TO TEENS + CHETNEY (MINUS WEDNESDAY):

Hi friends! I have A TOTALLY HYPOTHETICAL situation and I would LOVE to hear your advice. 💗 SO LIKE say you go out with a friend to a musical! And ahead of time you don't specify it's a "date", you're just out with your friend having a good time!

AND THEN at the end, they call it a "date". And you internally have a little spasm and freak out but don't say anything because maybe they just mean "date" like, friend-date, right? 🤔

But then like, you still continue to do regular things together! Occasionally go shopping! Mani/pedis! Hang out all the time! Go out for dinner! And the occasional handholding!👩🏻‍🤝‍👩🏼But no kissing. No other moves! VERy mixed signals.

WHAT DOES IT MEAN? Should I the person on the confused end make a move?? Hypothetically?? Should they just ask? But what if they ask and then the person was like "Relationships and feelings are meaningless." and then they get utterly heartbroken and have no one to talk to after that?? Does this feel like FRIENDS or something MORE?

FILTERED TO WEDNESDAY:

Hi did you know there are like TWO death covens in Vallo? 💀💀 I scored us an invite to the Ankou celebrations this Saturday to kick off the magical thing or whatnot and I wanted to know if you wanted to come with me?

I found my violin on my kitchen counter the other day. I'm pretty sure I didn't have it with me when I got here, but I'm glad that it's here anyway. A little reminder of home, I guess?

Anyway, playing is fun and all, but I'm used to playin' with a group -- or at least a couple of other people. Any other musicians or singers out here looking to play...and probably drink?

[Sanctuary Group*]

I have a bear cub. I cannot make a confirmation, but her markings do look correct.

Atreus, perhaps you should visit.

[* | if you live or volunteer at the Sanctuary, this means you]

Friendly reminder to come on down to the Ice Dragon for all your boba and/or ice cream related cravings. It'll be well worth your time, I promise!

I kind of realized that I arrived in a bit of a whirlwind, both in just dropping in here and then with the whole hell incident that went on right on the heels of it. (Thank you to everyone who worked on getting that sorted out, for the record. I'm sure that was a stressful time.) But, since that all is done and over with, I wanted to just give a reintro to those I haven't had the chance to meet. Seems only polite, I guess.

So, anyway. Hey, I'm Teddy Kaplan-Altman, also known as Hulkling back home, among other things. Billy is my husb boyfr uh partner, so apologies in advance because if you know him, you're going to have to get to know me. Package deal, I don't make the rules. Uh, let's see. I love Lord of the Rings, literally all pizza, and am unfortunately a morning person. I'm green sometimes, so don't be surprised by that.

That's all I've got. Either way, nice to meet you all.

BILLY

On a scale of yes to very yes, what are the chances you'll let me take you out on a date for the 14th?

Beware, there are sweets falling from the sky with instructions. A roof does not seem to matter. If anyone would like several bags full of "sing in the street" sweets, I appear to be collecting more every few hours.

Real weird day, but thanks to the folks who found me and got me taken care of. I wasn't expecting to universe hop today, but can anyone really expect universe hopping? Please say no, so I'm not left out or wondering if I missed the wrong classes in school that focused on real specific life lessons.

ANYway. Nice to be here, I'm Teddy. Anyone able to tell me where Billy Kaplan is?

[FILTERED TO THE GAANG]

I was up in the air with Appa when I got the notification and I dropped my phone in the ocean. They gave me a new one at the DOA but I think I lost all my pictures of Sokka?? I don't know I have to figure it out. I NEED those. What if he never comes BACK?


Sorry Katara, I shouldn't say that. You came back! I'm sure
I mean he'll probably

He could come back..Maybe?

Okay yeah we don't have a jolly old man who comes down chimneys and delivers presents, and no, there isn't a bunch of catchy music that starts three weeks before Thanksgiving, and sure, there may be a whopping one cheesy movie about it, but you know what Hanukkah does have? Eight nights of commemorating victory of the Maccabees over the Seleucidian Greek occupiers. It's eight because that's how many days a menorah was able to stay lit with one day of oil--so, yes, the menorah precedes the holiday itself, I went to Jewish camp for like, five summers in a row, my Hebrew is...not fantastic but I'm a nerd so I remember details.

Anyway. Eight nights of Hanukkah, eight nights of gifting (in my family it starts out lame with like, socks, one time my Bubbe gave me and Tommy monogrammed ones--for the other twin) and eight nights of spinning the dreidel. Just don't play against Tommy, he absolutely cheats.

Momda, Robodad The/A Vision, TimToms

If I magic up some latkes and magic-clean the apartment would maybe you guys come over? It doesn't have to be tonight, just sometime this week.

Tommy has no choice obviously.

Hey guys. So uh, first thing on the docket is that the Sanctuary Fundraiser Event will be next weekend! All day on the 10th we'll have a Solstice-themed fundraiser festival here, come on by! Pet the animals! Donate to a good cause! Get.. spanked?

Speaking of! We're currently looking for um, a designated spanker for the spanking booth Oh my gods why did we. It pays $500, no creepers allowed, and includes a lunch and breaks. So! That's a thing! That came up with when we were drinking and apparently, it raised a lot of money for Silniara Coven at their festival a few years ago, so now we have to do it, I guess! If you're looking to make a little money and get to spank willing people, inquire within.

( Unfiltered but cut for potential Ragnarok spoilers, and there probably will be spoilers in comments! )

I have to say, I'm enjoying seeing all the decorations that have started to come out in the last few days.

[ AANG ]

Hi. I just wanted to check in and see how you're doing now that everything has settled back down again.

[ SOKKA ]

I want to ask you something, but you CAN'T be annoying about it.

So the cold wasn't enough we gotta throw in followed around by your own personal raincloud too, Vallo? Rude. That's what it is. Just plain rude.

What's something that's happened lately that makes you happy?

GAANG

I went to the store this morning and loaded us up on supplies just in case the storm turns out to be really bad. We may want to make some extra accommodations for all the animals too.

PROS FOR MONDAY: Got my entire wardrobe from home, finally.

CONS FOR MONDAY: My room is overrun. This closet space is only big enough to hold a fart.


Throwing it out there, but if dinosaurs are your thing you should subscribe to my channel where I pose hotly in an inflatable t-rex costume and dance around the pole. There's no nudity. Think it's ridiculous? You're absolutely right, it is, but I promise you I've been making a killing off people being into weird things so judge me all you want. I'm flush with $$$$$. Best job I've ever had.

Okay, so like, back when there were less of you, I meant to post this and now its 9 days before the day, and I have become frantic but I need to figure this out before I drag Carol with me to go shopping.

And also, since there's more of you, maybe I'll get some ideas! Maybe some future people can also help by conveniently remembering something for your past about it!

I need Halloween costume ideas. For me, they're usually a great way to cosplay at school, and my go-tos are usually Captain Marvel and Black Widow, of course. One time I also did a female genderbent version of Iron Man and was all psyched to wear it until Zoe Zimmer did one too and it looked way cuter on her so in a fit of rage, I didn't wear it. (Disclaimer: Zoe and I are cool now, she helped me out a whole lot recently.)

Now I know characters are sometimes the way to go but we also live in a world where those same characters you thought were fictional are actually here or you just met your real life hero. So, what's something else you'd go for without making it awkward for anyone?

Filter: Peter Parker

If you became a baby or an old guy, I'm going to be mad and send noor light right through your window.

I've spent the last like twenty four hours or whatever drowning in jalapeno poppers, pizza, and my weight in tacos. This is probably super surprising to everyone but it literally only made me feel worse. So I'm going to try something else. Suki really enjoyed making hats for Unagi, so maybe it would be cool if everyone just dropped pictures of their pets dressed up? I don't know. I just think maybe something to make us smile might be good.

TEAM AVATAR
I think I'm going to go throw Boomerang around for a bit. But I'll be back later if you still want to pile on?

CONGRATULATIONS ZUKO! YOU ARE THE BEST! YOU DESERVE THAT BIG STACK OF MONEY!!!



And I'm only a LITTLE sad you didn't go UNDER the mountain but at least you got to see all of Toph's hard work! Anyway, let's party! Or at least stuff our faces with lots of jalapeno poppers and roll in all your mountains of cash? (Did they give you cash?? I don't even know.)

Reports of the hole in my chest have been greatly exaggerated. Maybe. I don't know what father and Lance told everyone. Just know it's going to be a really nice scar and I'm going to tattoo Jörmungandr around the jagged edges. Or get Ronan to do it because it's in an inconvenient location.

Thank you to everybody that helped out at the Sanctuary while I was uh, unconscious. I had a little something sent to you guys this morning! I'm on bed rest??? light duty for the next-- Freya, how long am I on light duty? Until the hole uh, fully heals, I guess. Which shouldn't take too long! Score one upside to my godly physique.

[OOC: Sanctuary volunteers that helped out with the animals and stuff during all of the Darkness & whatnot are getting a baked goods basket! Full of pastries and muffins and breads and a few cronuts. It was delivered by a very pleasant gnome woman who may try to become your new grandma.]

Listen up losers. With the race coming up it's occurred to me some of you are PAINFULLY BAD at trash talk. None of this "your car is a muted color of blue that does not suit you". NO. You gotta go for the JUGULAR. You gotta stab them in the GUT with WORDS. You gotta make them feel it, it's personal. It's raw. It's an art.

Learn your opponent. Pick on your friends. Don't just grab some random guy who just learned to drive and hasn't said shit to you and make fun of him, you're just being a dick. Focus on the race and the car and your opponents clear lack of skills. Or their face, if you get desperate. Oh also don't pull out the "your mom" trash talk, you know how much trauma all you idiots have? So much. You're gonna make somebody get all "but my mom is terrible and disowned me when I was twelve" and then you'll feel like the world's biggest prick. DO talk about how great you are in comparison to the other guy, but like, in a cool way.

Need practice? Hit me with it, I've got iron skin.