vallo

For those keeping track, this odd switching of alternate selves does indeed seem to be temporary as I have been informed that my bruised face is due to having been a different version of myself for several days.

Ongoing, of course, but temporary.

BLUE

I apologize for abandoning you. How are you holding up?

When all you wanna do is take a walk to run some ERRANDS and Hi, warning: we have a lot of violent activity centered around the Crossed Quills and the village around it. We got monsters, we got portals (??? why), and everything is breaking. I think And I don't know if it's because I got thrown into a damn tree too hard, but I think these things aren't swiping at any of the locals?

It seems that I had grown very used to the extra presence and energy that Catrin brought into the house, because now it just feels very big and empty this morning. I miss her already.



I also think that I might need to start advertising for a roommate or two. This house just isn't meant for one person.

Good news, I remembered where my past snack hideouts were!

Or my younger self had so many of them that it was basically probability working in my favor?

Either way this is a solid victory for me second only to getting a massive lick from one of the cows, slimy but totally worth it.

That awkward moment when you wake up in a field with a toddler because your house hasn't been built yet. Never change, Vallo.

I'm making an observation.

Dads, I may need you both to run interference with Kiri.

A poll for the masses:

Say that you've never actually been blessed by the mysteries of Vallo and this is the first time you've been jettisoned to the past where apparently your absolute favorite food truck that has all the properly greasy comfort foods hasn't yet started operating. And say that you were blasted back to a past where your dads and uncle are still babies (objectively speaking; they're all old back home, okay?) and have no idea that you're even a possibility?

Do you:

A. Play it cool. 😎
B. Tear it off like a bandaid; surprise, it's me! Your daughter you probably are not expecting even a little bit! 🫢
C. Other, please explain. 🤔

I was just with Dorian. We'd been back from camping for maybe an hour before I stopped in the office to pick some stuff up.

He can't Everything is so wrong back home and I don't even know if he's safe or if What if he's I can't do this ag

This is fucked.

So that is what kind of Monday it is going to be like, eh? Dragon friend, do not worry, they are all very dangerous and remarkable.

[FILTERED TO ESSEK]

Is there ah- something you wanted to tell me?

Ty says you've been helpful and decent to him. So thanks. I'm Julian.



I don't really know what to say. Social media is a Mundane I've never spent much time on the internet. And my girlfriend usually does most of the talking. I don't know how to do this without her I'm still wrapping my head around the fact that Downworlders and M humans are living peacefully together in the open here. Is that really working as well as it seems? If so, could somebody tell me your secret?

Anyway. I guess I'll find an art supply store while I figure out what to do with myself.

This social network thing has a severe lack of memes being shared and I'm a little disappointed. But also it feels weird to know that anything I write is going to be read by a bunch of people I don't really know instead of like followers or something. So what's up, everyone? Are memes a cool thing in this universe? Like a great way to cope with finding out we're in an infinite universe?

What about quality-of-life questions to start discussions? Example: since like anyone can show up here, what fictional (to you) character would you be very chill to meet? I'll go first - I want to meet Megamind.

Do we think that maybe there will be something else that attacks this week and maybe it's a good reason to stay home and not go to school? For safety. Thank you!

Also, there were lots of people who were interested in riddles and that was VERY fun to learn new ones so I thought I would share a different type of riddle/puzzle! It is called a magic square and you put the numbers in the box so that the totals of each row, column, and diagonal are the same! Kiri helps me when I get stuck.

Xhorhaus

Also, there is a wolf who has been circling the house. I have been observing it since we went to school. And now that we are going home, it is sort of following us. I'm not scared though, because it seems very friendly. And big. Please advise.

And Caleb you should stay inside just in case.

ENID & WEDNESDAY

I just got home from the library and I noticed that the wards protecting the house were messed with. They weren't fully broken, but it's odd so I'm going to be asking for some help to reinforce them and get one of those cameras for the front door and other places on the lot, just to look out. I don't know that it was anything nefarious, but I'd rather be safe than sorry.

Anyway. About Fig I know that I'm not Anyw Please let me know if there's anything else I can do to make things feel more secure, all right?

CALEB

I think someone might have tampered with the wards on the house. I came home and they were clearly touched, though I don't know if someone was trying to break in or if that is just me being paranoid. Either way, will you come over when you have a chance and check my new warding work, just for another set of eyes?

Also, I just wanted to Today has been When you have a chance, that's all.

MATTHEW & TALCOTT

I don't How was the wedding? Fun?

I know it's spooky season and boy am I here for all of the spooky things (although the skeletons are getting into the mood a little early? Didn't we have Halloween decorations come to life one year??) and cooler weather and s'mores and bonfires and hayrides and all that comes along with it buuuuuuuuuuut it's also a great snack time! Or, you know, "great" depending on your interpretation.

( Here there be snacks of varying degrees of taste )

Also no notes for these friends who I have officially deemed the Baa Boys. Working on a farm is amazing because everything can change in a day or two! All of them have such different personalities too, like, I can tell you EXACTLY which cow is the best listener, which goat will literally try to rip your snack apron off to get to the good stuff, and which alpacas are going to be the goofiest (hint, it's all of them)

I'm really lucky to be a small part of keeping our family farm going. :) Come by and see us at the farmer's market! I have it on good authority all of the animals are super selfie friendly!

Talcott

Hi, school started so now you get daily reminder to stand up and stretch and get some water and a snack. I maaaaybe hid some Nerds clusters in your backpack but that doesn't count. :)

And

So Blue and Gansey's wedding is this weekend and it's going to be amazing and so fun and beautiful!are you Do you want Should we Is it dumb to ask if Were you going to go? Obvs I have to help with the wedding itself and like, walking Blue is already making me emotional thinking about it but after the actual wedding I'm free and maybe we could go? Together?

Why am I dumb

Or if you're not going, that's cool!! Disregard!!! Totally cool!!

I know that flood was hella doozy and all and some cleaning is still going BUT... I am still down for doing an end of the summer group BBQ and bonfire night if anyone is up for it.

So, right, I run a Dungeons and Dragons group that's been going on for awhile (it's a tabletop role-playing game) (which is basically storytelling while getting into conflicts) (we're always taking new players, I can teach you, go to Mike's store for dice) but sometimes I like trying new games because one sheet games are easier for everyone to learn as there's literally like, three rules to learn and it's a good way to get started or try a new genre. I tried to play Lasers & Feelings with Teddy, but it turns out that when you're the long prophesized ruler of two forever warring races (thank you Kree, thank you Skrulls) who actually has to sit through hours long meetings with diplomatic envoys, it takes the fun out of roleplaying in space.

So, Feng Shui 2 is like playing a character in the most Michael Bay John Cena Dwayne The Rock Johnson Jason Momoa Jason Statham Whoever is the New James Bond John Wick Hey We Need Other Gender Representation Up In Action Movies cinematic masterpiece of all time. Think every action star cliché you can think of, and then put all of those characters in a movie with an unlimited CGI budget. Who are you? The grizzled veteran sucked in one last time? The child of a recently deceased famous parent come to make your parent proud?

For everyone who has always wanted to put on sunglasses while slo-mo walking away from an exploding building or pulled a helicopter out of the air by sheer brute strength, or said a quippy one liner before becoming a blur of martial arts, this is the game for you. Give me your action star name, your cliche/trope, and your signature move/catchphrase, and let's go save the world.

I don't have an official day yet, I figure when I find out who's interested I'll send out a few dates and we can pick whatever works best--and if there's a big demand we can make different groups by who is available when, I don't mind. As per usual, there will be snacks because if there's not food, Tommy will riot.

Teds

So the fighting made me think

Do you miss

Or maybe you don't miss because you're doing it

You were a better superhero than me

But maybe I sort of

What if

Hi.

[Enid, Adaine, Fig]

I will be in the upper floors of the castle until this fun new event has ended.

Not to be That Nerd, but I am officially starting the Back To School Countdown. I like the sounds of most of my classes and am being cautiously optimistic on the professors based on what I've heard, so fingers crossed to a new year.

I know this is probably not the popular opinion, but please tell me there are others that are excited for September 5 and not just me.

So I just get to keep this phone? And everyone can just see what I post here all the time?

HAPPY NEW SMUT TUESDAY, VALLO.

Listen, I can't be the only one who gets to enjoy fresh new smutty romances every Tuesday, so I am here to bring you a list of new releases that you should be checking out, too. You can come by Chastity's Nook, or request Frumpkin-delivery if you'd prefer smut-on-demand. Let's see what we've got up for grabs this week:

Spellbound Hearts
In the enchanted realm of Elysium, a talented sorcer and a dashing rogue find themselves embroiled in a quest to save the kingdom from an ancient curse. As they battle through mystical challenges and unearth long-lost secrets, their hearts become entwined in a spell of love that defies all odds. Perfect for fans of people banging in forbidden places (but I can not confirm or deny who's doing the banging because spoilers).

Shadows of Passion
Amidst the darkness of an ever-encroaching evil, two warriors from rival clans must join forces to protect their land. As they journey together, their initial animosity transforms into an intense attraction that threatens to ignite the very flames of passion, ✨✨binding✨✨ them closer than ever before. (✨✨IYKYK.✨✨)

Whispers of the Moonlight Dance
In the ethereal moonlit woods, a graceful elven princess and a noble human knight meet unexpectedly during a masquerade ball. Drawn to each other's enigmatic allure, they embark on a clandestine romance, but their love must withstand the prejudices of their divergent worlds. (For fans of banging wherever as long as the LOVE is forbidden~)

Arcane Enchantment
Within the walls of the esteemed Arcanum Academy, a gifted mage and a promising alchemist are paired together for an experiment in magical synthesis. As they weave spells and mix potions, they discover an enchantment that goes beyond the arcane arts - an enchantment of the heart. It's giving Hot for Teacher, minus the teacher.

Fates' Embrace
Destined by an ancient prophecy, a fearless dragon rider and a mysterious oracle find themselves bound by a shared destiny. As they confront epic battles and formidable foes, their unyielding bond blossoms into a love that transcends time and empowers them to face their shared future. For fans of BANGING ON DRAGONS.

Thank you for coming to my presentation. You should 5000% buy a copy of all five. Trust me, they're all five extra 🌶🌶🌶🌶🌶!!