vallo

[delivered to Caleb around noon, wherever he may be]

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Should you be in the mood for a sweet treat today, an item per person is on my tab at the Slayer's Cake until close. I considered working with the soups restaurant instead, but I miss Jester I have accepted that sweets walk hand in hand with birthdays and who am I to say otherwise.

This is also year three I have done this, so. Tradition, I suppose.

Though you should go and get soup, also. Support local businesses that I frequent, so they might remain open until I am at least 524.



Oh and on the topic of local businesses: buy books from my husband, please. Thank you.

My birthday and my wedding anniversary are coming within the next two weeks and I have three requests in regards to these events:

1. I would like to not be turned into a younger version of myself, an older version of myself, or a version of myself that was an Echo Knight and Taskhand.

2. I would like for Aeor to not do something silly and bring with it snow, wild magic, and Aeorian hunters.

3. I know that it is early for the holidays and the culprit is rather contained, but I would also like to suggest that I would like to not be pulled into a Christmas town.

These things can happen at another time, but not within the next two weeks, thank you very much. I would like to enjoy getting older in peace and also be myself to give my husband his anniversary gift on the correct day. That is all, thank you.



Oh, another:

4. I would like for those of you with an interest to listen to my most recent podcast. It is, as the children might say, a banger.

With the holiday coming up, do we need to make a list of costumes that people are planning on donning themselves in should we have a repeat of previous years and we have some oddities occurring and running around the streets and forest?

It feels responsible, but I also understand should we be embracing chaos.

Alright, well, this very legitimate and perfectly reasonable memory wiping business has gotten out of control. Our contacts assure us they are working most diligently on it, however...I am the sort that would rather take issues in my own hands.

(Harrow, this is one of those 'other duties as assigned' in case you were curious)

If you are interested in working out a solution, please come to the DOA. If you have no ability to do so but would like to support, I enjoy a full bodied red and spicy food. If you are being impacted by this memory issue--or if someone has told you that you are, I suppose, give us about an hour to start and then please come by. I make no immediate promises, but we will get to the root of this.

If you had to name actual angels, what would their names be?

( The angels in question )

They are perfect and I will not hear otherwise. People I live with, they are coming home with me please?. There was an influx of cats at the animal shelter and so if you intend to adopt, now would be the time because I am likely to take all of them if given even half a chance. Cats deserve the world and are better than ~85% of people.

Also, as of this week I am employed by the local school as the secretary executive administrator. As of now it appears that the job is primarily marking down when students will not be in attendance because of illness which...I didn't know was a thing as I was never allowed to be sick. It turns out that getting a job is very easy when you have blackmail on the principal when you have a sparkling personality.

[FILTERED TO 18+]

( 18+ - Mentions of incubus/succubus vibes but nothing SA triggering I promise. )

Excuse me ghost pirates but this is not the welcome I was expecting, at the very least you could bring me some sort of tropical drink.

The water elemental cheerleaders are doing their best but they were previously used to flirt with stupid people so if they try with you then--no, Aelwyn so if you see one and they're a bit distracted, just point them towards the dirty ghost pirates and try not to take too many pompoms to the face.

Do I receive another bagel? I mostly know what it is now Adaine, you are on the clock, I'm waiting.

An entity that I can only describe as a ghost pirate just attempted to abscond me of all of the various earrings and jewelry on my person, which is a great deal regarding the former thanks to, you know, long ears.

That is a sentence that I both wrote and is 100% factual and truthful.

I was once a high-ranking government official at court and the eldest son of the matriarch of respected noble family. I am now being interrupted while grocery shopping in order to prove to ghost pirates that my wedding ring is my own. What is this life, sometimes?

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IT HAS BEEN ONE WHOLE YEAR SINCE GANSEY AND I HAVE BEEN MARRIED.


Never thought I'd be that person, but I like the way Gansey's face gets all soft when I say it.

The Enchanted Arborium opens this weekend! Specials on herbs & tinctures and a discount for the first five custom tree orders. Custom trees can be shaped to almost any purpose, including attraction or repulsion of people or creatures (magical or otherwise), protection, clean air, boosted mood, etc. We also have some rare Amaranth-Dragon blossoms and a range of jewellery made from magical glass dragon vomit Chime's offshoots.

I've been working on this for a while and I figured I better cut the ribbon now before I get pulled into another dimension or kidnapped by a goose, or something. See you there!

HELLO EVERYONE

I am sorry to say that CRIMES have occurred.

The crimes are kidnapping.

The perpetrators are the geese (again).

I will remind everyone to conduct proper surveillance and to secure the perimeter before attempting anything.

THEY CANNOT BE NEGOTIATED WITH (again) (I do not think, I tried, bird-to-bird).

We are at the lake (again) (this is embarrassing for me but DADS I did not MEAN to get kidnapped)

Thank you.

CALEB

Husband, look.

( Cut for image! )

I was so delighted by being around my brother (Vax'ildan, it's alright if you didn't notice, I am the far more attractive twin and now I have several years on him) that I never made a proper introduction. I am Lady Vex'ahlia de Rolo, but Vex will do! We're all friends here, I think? At the very least we should share embarrassing stories of Vax - I will tell you of him as a child if you all tell me idiotic things he's done here.

My youngest daughter is with me, so if anyone has any suggestions for schooling and clothing for a young girl, age 8, I would appreciate it. In that same vein, I will be looking for a job - I have been on the Tal'Dorei Council as the Master of Commerce (I prefer Coinmistress, it has a nicer ring to it) for over a decade now, finances are my bread and butter.

Hey make sure you assholes come to the market so Declan can see what a goddamn SUCCESS I am it is. It was way fucking better with Syd around but I can't do anything about that part. If it's only the Donaldson twins arguing with me about the price of ice cream (which has not fucking changed in three years!) I'm going to be pissed tho.



Also uh. Our surrogate's pregnant so. Nora's on the way. Wish us luck and shit.

This has surely been an experience of a day.

Where might one go to find spell components and is there potential for metal rods attuned to other planes?

Anyone else do anything weird last night?

These plants are starting to attempt to invade my greenhouse and it's becoming a nuisance. I know that this is likely a case of "there are bigger problems in the world, Essek" and "you should reevaluate your priorities, Essek", but I will be difficult to live with if they impede my orchids yet again.

More difficult than normal. I am self aware.

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