vallo

Claire has been asking about a slumber party with Nadia but we all had a pretty rough night yesterday so I'm not sure if we're up for hosting at the mortuary. Would you be alright with her coming to your place? Maybe tomorrow, since it's a Friday and they're off school the next day?

We'll pack everything she needs and make sure she has a sleeping bag.

Well, as it's been nearly three weeks since we've arrived and I've seen no sign that you lot are planning on either sacrificing us or indoctrinating us into what amounts to a fanged MLM cult, I can only assume that you're playing the long game. I can respect that. I was once kidnapped for three months and nothing happened, literally nothing, so I suppose my patience has been honed.

A few updates - I'm looking for employment. I considered returning to school, but all enquiries seem to indicate that it won't transfer to home and I refuse to take "Macroeconomic Variables and Markets" more than once because I love myself. I may be interested in taking a music course or two - hobby - but my primarily concern presently is clothing. All I have to call my own is this hideous Target ensemble I picked up back home and some panic boxers I purchased when I first arrived here. I've seen your shops on the Main Street, and some of them are... acceptable, but I'd like to know where you lot enjoy shopping. If you suspect you're probably unqualified to answer this question, you are.

[ Filtered to Chastity's Nook ]

Hello, my name's Tyrannus Basilton Grimm-Pitch, and with any luck you'll never have need to use it again: Baz is fine. I've left behind my CV when I was in your store yesterday afternoon. If you have an opening for a job I'd be very interested in taking it, as we're down to peanut butter and crackers in the pantry, and my standards for cuisine are higher than that. Back home, I'm working on my degree (economics) at university and in school I was top of my graduating class. Reading's a hobby of mine, and magic a way of life. I enjoy organization to the point where it drives my boyfriend insane, and I have a bright, filthy mind. I survived a truly stupefying amount of garbage and if I encountered a murder turkey in the hallowed halls of your store, I wouldn't hesitate.

Thank you for your consideration.

WHO: Katherine & Eleanor
WHAT: Discussing how they died over margaritas
WHERE: A reputable bar in Vallo City, Katherine has some class okay
WHEN: Let's just go with recently
WARNINGS: Talks of dying, that kind of thing
STATUS: Complete

( So this isn't one of those Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde type stories, is it? )

Greetings! Dr. Hank McCoy here, with good news (well, I think it's good) and a request of sorts. Recently I received the plans and parts to build a machine called Cerebro, something that I'm familiar with as I happened to design and build it once upon a time as well, in another world a few times, actually, since it kept getting destroye--. In a nutshell, it is a machine that amplifies brainwaves - an ESP device, if you will, allowing the user to locate essentially anyone in the world (our former Headmaster of the Xavier Institute used it to track mutants across the globe), depending on their own unique mental signature.

Here, I aim to have Cerebro used as not only a locator device but also a way to understand and gain new information about technology - our current host world is filled with all sorts of tech (waypoints, for example), and this function would also be useful for anything that may appear here, or be left behind in the unfortunate instance the original owner of the tech disappeared and we have questions about the functionality.

I would appreciate some volunteers to help me test it? The only caveat, of course, is that you must have telepathic abilities - otherwise Cerebro can be a bit of an overload, and that does not seem pleasant. I'd be happy to pay you for your time - cash or chocodile Twinkies, either way, we can come to an arrangement.

If anyone at Morningside finds it has suddenly started raining in their apartment, don't panic. There was something glowing in the toilet and I fished it out. It appears to be one of the totems mentioned. I have some affinity for water so I'll get it under control. Eventually It just might take a minute.

If there is any permanent damage, submit your complaint to the DOA office and I'll handle that too.

High Scorer is now my favorite arcade here because I found the most amazing shit in the claw machine. It's like this shiny rock necklace and it glows bright red. I feel so blinged out when I wear it and I don't even know what it's made of. Satan's tears, maybe?

I mean I put it on and then it was like SURPRISE FLAMES and I hadn't ever really farted fire since that Burrito Box adventure in college but it wasn't even that. No, like, I literally threw fire. From my fists, not my ass.

This place is wild.

Today's even worse than the girl singing off key Ariana Grande with the wrong lyrics. I was trying to watch the games I missed cause I was dead and they were showing them and the Jags don't even have Bortles anymore. Then I found out that they had Foles and then he went to a different team and now we have a guy who's stupid good at outfits but stupid bad at football.

This is the worst day ever.

I appreciate the video. Clearly, people had a lot of fun with it. And it's actually helpful, too, so - thanks.

Anyway, hi Vallo. I heard there might be people here from my world. Anyone from Earth-Prime? Kara? Kelly? Lena? ugh

[filtered to hargreeves people and their associates, any interested friends, parents of other smol people, idk]

Not complaining about the sudden bonus appearing in my bank account - maybe that was a reward for working overtime and then some during the turkey mess. But it's good timing since a lot of that will be used to throw Claire a birthday tea party this Sunday afternoon, at Looking Glass Teas. In the backyard, so it will be a legitimate whimsical experience.

Let us know if you can attend, and feel free to bring any other youngins - I know she has some friends at school she'd love to see there. I'm also going to order a cake from someplace otherwise if I baked it, it would be carrot.

Is anyone else experiencing the whole weird everyone and everything singing at you phenomenon? I don't know if this is more or less annoying than that time everyone played hot potato with the depression key when we were in Texas. Who even cares about finding the perfect pebble?

And no, strange man pretending to be a statue, I do not take this fucking pebble now and forever. Does anyone else feel like they're stuck in that Buffy episode with the demon that makes everyone sing and dance? Only it's just everyone else and it's only singing. I'm about 50% sure a pebble was singing.

WHO: Katherine & Dr. Strange
WHAT: Getting the vampire on a blood bag schedule
WHERE: Chakrabarti Clinic
WHEN: Friday (yesterday)
WARNINGS: Talk of blood?
STATUS: Complete

( Hope it’s that fae blood - if anything else that sounds like a potentially crazy acid trip. )

Okay, so it's super gross outside. Is everyone fine? If you're not fine, do you need someone to make sure you're fine and/or not being stubborn about it? Because I'm really good at doing that. I'm a helper. It's not everyone who has the mental and physical fortitude to handle Vin Diesel naked and crying, so, I come with a highly established pedigree.

Speaking of being naked and crying (or just crying, because y i k e s), I have in my perfectly manicured PR guru hands (and email) a list of farms who need l'assistance with cleanup and replenishing what was lost after the Turkey Trot - things are still kind of hairy out there but if you have a minute and want to help out those in the forest, let me know and I'll do a matchy-match with you and a farm.

Aaaaand if you don't want to do that but still need to pick up Valentine's Day gifts - Rose Apothecary has you covered. I also just hired this sweet old vampire lady who works overnight to restock and do inventory and knows everything about caring for smooth alabaster skin and getting bloodstains out of clothing. Total genius.

Yeah, I'd like to lodge a complaint about the murder turkey's lack of respect to breakfast happy hour. They owe me the rest of my $19.99 bottomless mimosa.

And a new pair of shoes.

>> Motherhood is sacrificing your only (currently) pair of Jimmy Choos to turkey carnage if it means getting your daughter a decaf frappe
>> There was even an explosion
>> O V E R I T

Hi, I'm Ava.

Uh [...] has anyone seen a group of nuns? Young-ish nuns? Like, early twenties or so?

WHO: Hank & Katherine (plus Nadia)
WHAT: Hank shows up a little bit after Katherine, they're reunited
WHERE: Morningside
WHEN: After this
WARNINGS: Nooooot really, dude
STATUS: Complete

( All I dream about are Disney musicals now. )

Sure, why not.

That's the short summary - but the longer summary is, we're brought here by an inexplicable 'blip' (which is actually the technical term I've heard used to describe a similar phenomenon and, well, I guess there really isn't a better word than blip) of arcane energy that won't pop us back out until the balance is offset once more, but in the meantime we're supposed to 'build lives' and 'drink much alcohol.'

Free drink at Galahd for the newcomers, I got that too.

Oh, and occasionally monsters crawl from the woodwork and/or forest to come kill us, and there's also another dark dimension mirroring this one currently contained in a snowglobe trinket. What am I missing? Anyone want to chime in?

I've done some research about the Day of Valentine's so I know what it bloody well is now, thanks to the Google and also asking you lot - that being said, what better way to spend the day then romantically cruising between the islands? Molly just loaded quite a bit of rum onto the Siren's Call II, enough to last for awhile so booze cruises are open. The booze is admittedly optional, I don't force anyone to imbibe alcohol against their will. The goal is simply fun and fresh air and maybe some fishing! Impress your loved ones by catching a big floppy thing.

Interestingly, I also had a gift show up from home. It was once given to me by Hawke, and it's a Rivaini talisman - Rivain is where I'm from, you see. But it's meant to bring about love and boost fertility, so Maker only knows I don't need to keep it in my flat. If anyone would like to purchase it as a gift I'll be bringing to Glorious Purveyors so see what price they ask for it. I figure someone who wants an occupied womb will call upon its magic eventually.

ETA: Molly also reminded me about the hot chocolate cruise! That's exactly what it says on the tin, hot chocolate instead of booze. For the younger Vallo denizens.

Fascinating! Truly, this is fascinating. Have you considered the sheer amount of possible particle configurations in multiple universes? Because I have, and we're looking at about 10^10^122 distinct possibilities. An infinite number of particle arrangements, thus repeating for an infinity! And to think, I've somehow ended up in this particular arrangement of particles. I would have thought that, given the notion of wormhole passages and white hole escape routes, and what lurks beyond the event horizon of a black hole, I'd have a greater chance of being sucked into a black hole even though technically black holes don't do much 'sucking' but instead merely 'sit' and thus other objects tend to crash into them - but no, here I am!

Dr. Hank McCoy, at your service. I have spoken with the kind welcoming committee at the Dead-on-Arrival (are we?? My pulse is still ticking) building and have been caught up to the best of their ability. Now I ask, where might one find the best cup of turbo-charged coffee?

Also, Katherine, I heard you and Nadia arrived just before me! Scrolling back on this device proved to be a mostly worthwhile endeavor for that purpose - otherwise, I fell into a different kind of black hole indeed.

Really wishing there was some consent contract to sign that keeps you from getting plucked from your own world and then thrown into this freak show. Not like I had any plans.

I'm Katherine, and I've got two inquiries:

1. Is Disney + a thing here? Asking for my six year old whose taking this with more patience and grace than I am.
2. Looking for someone by the name of Hank McCoy - loves science, also turns into a big blue beast if you're being rude.

Thanks. I hate it here already.