vallo

Wait

Fuck

It's this shit fixed or not? WHO'S GOT EYES ON HENDERSON? This shit still isn't funny

Filter: Hawkins House

I’m coming home early. Just generally check in, and let know if anyone has eyes on Mike.

Filter: Mike Wheeler

Breaking shit helped for me so if you want to do that, let me know. Just tell me where you are and I’ll come to you.

I was just with Dorian. We'd been back from camping for maybe an hour before I stopped in the office to pick some stuff up.

He can't Everything is so wrong back home and I don't even know if he's safe or if What if he's I can't do this ag

This is fucked.

I'm not sure what Robin and I w

Is there a reason some journalist professors can be a bit assholeish? Am I supposed to be getting prepared for the "real world" of journalism or something?

Filter: Steve Harrington

Hi. I'm done being selfish and wallowing in my own pity. Is there anything I can do for you?

i'm posting my recent search history in solidarity, because I feel bad for you guys:

oil painting tips
oil paint history
how to make oil paint
how to stop crying
best coffee in vallo city
lofi beats to study to
vallo aita
is disappearing a breakup
best donuts in vallo city


we're all weird and that's okay.

[filtered to kellach]
i think you can go to college if you want, but you probably can't become the goblin king. also, have you ever seen The Labyrinth?

So I've come to a realization that this is the second time I've apparently broke something from Vallo's crazy shenanigans and it always happens around this time of the year. I'm going to have to start bubble-wrapping myself or something prior to doing anything in future fall seasons or at the very least... try to ask Vallo to give us a fucking break.

But, I appreciate my colleagues replacing my beloved old water bottle with a new one with one that says Slaughter Bottle. I'm going to get a whole lot of uses out of this one!

[...] for hydration only.

Oh ye, Vallo, you great betrayer, you fiend, you Judas. I'd grown too complacent, too trusting, but oh, now I see how that trust was mislaid.

I'm pretty sure I lost at least four hours of progress in Knightmare's Call.



Alright, now that I'm done lamenting the fact that I'm going to have to face Zeddicus Grail all over again when I barely beat him on my fifth attempt (I'm not done lamenting. I am still anguished. Still bereaved), I need some help settling an argument:

Are candlelight dinners always romantic, even when the candlelight is necessary because you have no power?

Any of you magical types have something to take that would instantly make a hangover go away? Like I mean by seconds?

Filter: Robin Buckley

Okay, I didn't get to properly ravish you in that suit by the end of the night, but I swear, I'm going to make it up to you as soon as I no longer feel like my head is going to burst!

Fuck
I don't accep
Trinket is g
She's

FRIENDS

Just humor me and tell me you're fucking here.

If anybody gets any embarrassing pictures of the bride and groom on their phone, you're required by Barns Law to share them immediately. If they're REALLY good, I'll give you a finder's fee. If they're hilariously BAD, I'll give you a finder's fee and, I don't fucking know. A wheel of cheese. There.

[FILTERED TO ADAM]

The bartender says we're out of the old man's favorite fizzy juice somehow so I'm gonna be a minute but I just want you to know that your ass looks criminal in those pants. If you love me even a LITTLE, you'll keep the jacket off and roll up your sleeves before I get back.

First day of school, and we've got a bunch of skeletons just chilling on the school lawn. And I don't mean plastic "somebody got excited about Halloween early" skeletons. I mean actual bone skeletons that were walking around like they own the place. Carrie in my literature class said one of them asked her if she had any "tomes of power and might." (Apparently her math book doesn't count.)

So, thanks for making the first day of junior year good and weird, Vallo. Now I can think about how the hell skeletons are capable of talking instead of listening to anybody drone on about the syllabus.

Added Slightly Later:
Also, say I wanted to dampen sound around my lunch table at school so it's not so loud that we have to shout our whole conversation. Are there magic items that could do that? And if they do exist, how much would it probably cost to get one? (Specifically, could someone with "part time at the gaming store" money afford a Bubble of Quiet or whatever?)

[Filtered to Vallo High]
Hey Outlanders. Are we sticking with our lunch table from last year, or are we trying for one of the ones up by the windows?

Okay, I am pretty sure there are not many people in the world as ecstatic and motivated about schoolwork than I am -- I mean I can list some people here but that's also why they're one of my closest friends -- and normally, if I'm giving extra coursework and I know it'll give me more credit than I would otherwise get, I would be all for it.

But seriously, who decides they're going to email all their students before the classes have even begun and the summer vacations have even ended to let us know about any required reading to start before the first day of class? And to strongly suggest we get started on researching term papers?? I was supposed to be looking forward to Media Law And Ethics class, damn.

So, those of you with more experience with this, what's the usual reaction when Vallo takes away your spiky-haired best friend who is also your only employee? Is it stress eating? Because I'm stress eating.

Hey saw a bunch of people getting arrested while I was in the city getting some fucking snack groceries because Chetney ate all the beef jerky AGAIN. Looked real intense and shit.

The arrests, not the jerky aisle.



Also before anyone says it: I WASN'T INVOLVED. I was at the fucking grocery store. I've got an alibi, damn it.

Well, I'm officially enrolled in three classes to audit this fall. I've also been added to a group chat called 8 AM Calsses Should B Illegal - spelled just like that. Not really sure what that says about my soon to be classmates.

This seems as good a time as any to throw this out there to the Vallo masses to see what kind of interest there may be in such an event.

Slayer's Cake would like to host a big community wide picnic of sorts in early September, assuming it doesn't get cancelled due to time travel or hand monsters or killer turkeys. We'd partner with other local businesses and food trucks to provide plenty to eat. There would also be lots of activities and games for kids (young and old). Music provided by local musicians.

Because my thoughts for the event are styled after the festivals we used to have back in mine and Vax's childhood home before, I was also thinking of having a Gem of Vallo competition--basically a talent show/evening wear competition open to all walks of life. Maybe a pie eating contest? Dessert contest?

More details would come later but, before I go too far down this tunnel, would you lot be interested?

I'm down to five boxes of sticky notes from the twenty "Ella" ordered and I'm ready to give them away. Who needs to adhere their lives to every surface around them? They'll come with bonus glitter pens!

One thing I love about this place is how we all bring a little bit of our own homes to make this neat sort of melting pot of a community, letting other people experience the things we might have really loved before being brought here. It's nice, getting to celebrate other worlds that most of us will probably never get to see, outside of through the eyes of other Outlanders.

All that to say, thanks for the races this weekend. It was a blast.

DORIAN

I've decided I want to use my winnings on something fun. Want to get fancy?

Who needs a car when you can ride a big bird? Not Big Bird, but yeah, you get it. And I didn't even fall off or crash, so that was even a surprise for me. Second place is like winning without the extra attention, so I'm more than all right with that.

Kinda feels weird having cut in the middle of Lance and Atreus, but I'm kinda used to the third wheel thing.