vallo

Okay, now that I'm no longer 'fuck it all and let the world burn' mode. Which, sorry Keith.

1. If you know anyone who wants to manage a club or two lmk. Dorian's is mine again and so is Lux now but
I already have two full time jobs and am not looking for another. Also the Speakeasy, but thankfully Rory's business partner is heading up that.

2. Lucifer had a crap load of clothes and furniture and alcohol (but Roz and I took that). So open house, come for what you'd like. I'll probably donate all his books and scrolls and stuff to the Library. And I'm keeping the piano and some of the armory stuff from Maze, but well, anyone want some really cool weapons? IDK. Its a treasure trove of stuff from the beginning of well, existence, to now.

3. Also, who's up for drinks later tonight? Maybe some karaoke. Eli and I got parts in Jagged Little Pill and there will be ridiculous celebrating.

So you all were serious when you mentioned my getting a... job? Well. Such is the price of freedom, I suppose. Not to sell myself short, but I am uniquely qualified to be decorative and hilarious and little else that can be repeated in polite society. Unless you need someone stabbed? Do you need someone stabbed? Or perhaps something unlocked?

But only at night, of course. I'm a vampire spawn (worst kept secret, isn't it), and so can only maim, murder and preen during the evening hours. I assume is explains my hanging around your little government office the other day. It certainly wasn't out of ardor for your company so much as a requirement of survival.

I'm getting ahead of myself; I haven't introduced myself. My name is Astarion.

It's probably rather... pedestrian of me, but I'm actually looking forward to having a profession again. It's been a very long time. I've got to show up on time? Take lunch breaks? Sit at a table with other coworkers and talk about processes?

Precious.

Have you ever suddenly wondered about someone you grew up with that you haven’t seen or spoken to in years?

Earlier today I randomly thought about this girl I grew up with in foster care. She was kind of shy, but she had one of the most infectious laughs I’ve ever heard in my life. It was really loud too. Like you could hear it all the way across the house. And she would laugh at almost anything. The other kids and I used to play a game to see who could get her to laugh first or the loudest.

I haven’t seen her in about ten years, but I thought of her today and I don’t know why. I wonder if she’s doing alright and if she still laughs at everything.

This is important, hello, defense people, unless the Great Library appears to have gone all out with Halloween decorations early and violently, there is what appears to be an army of very mobile and animated skeletons amassing out front.

I intended to comment about the soup place being out of those grilled cheese tomato croutons and it makes for a much less enjoyable tomato soup experience, but that seems less important now.

I know its frowned on to drink at work but I will give pretty much anything you can think of if someone will bring me a bottle of something. Because it is way too early in the week for this much chatting.

[Defense]

Patrol report - I've got a number of what I'd call earth elementals here near the edge of the forest. I've managed to communicate with them enough to encourage them not to play 'toss' with the fully grown bear they were passing around and use a boulder instead. They seem harmless, if a little lacking in common sense.

I don't think it's anything to be too heavily worried about but heads up if there are still any elemental concerns.

[Sent via voice transmission]

Is anyone in the vicinity of [LOCATION]? I found Henry Townshend and a really shitty raft full of people. There are more people then I can get into my raft and could use a some help.

...wait what? [muffled voices as Leon talks to someone else on the raft]

[transmission resumes]

Also, if there are any medics in the area: we got at least one injury, possibly more.

Well, the Wilson house got hit pretty hard. If there's anyone who's in a safe location and doesn't mind taking in a friendly Rottie for a bit? I don't feel comfortable trying to leave Lola in the house even if it's on the upper floors, while I'm flying around the town.

And speaking of, anyone else out on patrol notice what looks like a massive metal head sticking out of the water near New Asgard? Not entirely sure what it is but this is a heads up for anyone who (1) does know what it is, and (2) also knows if we need to be cautious or anything.

[ooc: This is a voice recording with a lot of chaos in the background. Noct sounds strained but determined. All replies will also be voice recordings.]

Uh so I need back up at 45th and Grand. Spotted a bunch of elementals making the flooding worse and terrorizing a group of trapped people. I backed them off and I'm holding the line but I can't get these people out of here and stop these jerks from doing more damage at the same time.

[There's a crash and Noct makes a pained noise but keeps talking like it didn't happen.]

Some of the people here are injured. I tried to give them the healing potions I had on me but most of them got destroyed. So yeah.

Hurry? Thanks.

( Read more... )

Since the talk about them has sort of died down, just wondering if the shapeshifting doppelganger thing sorted itself all out? Did anyone get any info on what they were or where they came from?

I've been here long enough to know sometimes things just come and go and are mysterious because that's just Vallo, but I'm just curious. You know, no reason.

Eggs marinated in mountain dew for 6 hours before boiled, yolks made with nacho cheese Doritos and cayenne pepper.


I've got 24 of them. Who isn't chicken shit enough to try one?

( On a deserted beach outside the city... )

[Private Message to Leon Kennedy earlier this morning]

Good Morning, sir.

I remember that you said you were part of the Defense Force here in Vallo. I am looking to procure a few things for my own defense and preparations. Gunpowder, saltpeter, charcoal, and the like are at the top of my list, but I am open to substitutions. Would you know of where I could find such items?

Anyone want a castle?

No, seriously. There's a castle up in the north area of Vallo that was overrun by those hands and I guess the owner was so damn generous for the save he wants me to have it. But it comes with a condition.

You gotta marry his statue daughter.

And listen, Annabeth may not be here right now, but I love her and straight up not interested. BUT, I figured someone out there might if they really want a castle.

I really am sorry about the hands. Not that they're my fault - they are emphatically not my fault, in fact! But they are from home. You'll want to watch out for the ones that do magic the most. It's a real bugger to get out of their paralysis spell in time to avoid getting whomped.

Speaking from experience, I'm afraid.

Weaknesses include fire and beating the tar out of them. Good luck!!!

Defense teams should be aware that a giant hand (taller than a man) attacked at Cloud Recesses today. Gladiolus, Katou Yue, and I were able to eliminate the threat without serious injury to anyone here, but it is seldom that a trouble in Vallo is strictly isolated.

This particular hand appeared on a rooftop and attempted to crush me under its palm. It also fired a dart equipped with a paralytic poison which thankfully is not deadly. We were able to dispatch it quickly enough that I do not know what else it might be capable of.

So I just saw a guy walking down the street with a fully functional metal arm. Is that like, something anyone can get, or do you have to be some sort of super badass? Because I've been rocking this hook hand for a couple of weeks now and like, it's nice, I'm all about the pirate aesthetic, but there's something to be said about being able to tie my own shoelaces.

[Filtered away from the Hacketteers]

So hey, did anyone else show up here with a bunch of people from the same universe as you, where you guys remember more or less the exact same things except with a couple of little differences?

And by a couple of little differences, I mean some pretty major differences.

ok fine I'll post on your dumb little baby network. hey losers how's the reality hopping going? anybody NOT sitting at a desk asking me what my SPECIES is figure out which big bad jerk is behind all this? I got things to do and a team to watch out for otherwise they'll get dead and then I gotta find a whole new team and who has the time for THAT?


speaking of

anybody seen a doofy looking tree wandering around?

[OOC: Please pretend this was posted yesterday]

I've gone through most of my life without any allergies, then I wind up here and suddenly I can't stop sneezing. To add insult to injury, for the last hour I've been sneezing out daisies. I think hope they're daisies.

Do they...is there like a pill for this?