vallo

Nick?

Nicholas?

Nicholas Miller?

They said you were here.

Has anyone seen Nick Miller? Dark hair, dark soulful eyes you could drown in. Perpetual five o'clock shadow. Five foot nine. Five foot nine and a half when he stands proud which is a sight to behold.

He may or may not be hiding in a tree.

You know what's great about showing up a second time here? I've already reached the acceptance part of the process and my brain isn't on fire like last time. Vast improvement. I can enjoy the free money in peace this time. Red? Raccoon eyes? Drinks on me this time.

What up, y'all? Nick Miller in the house. Where's my favorite Canadian and baker? Did I miss the wedding?

Floaty arm man, you'll be proud, I broke almost nothing this time! Just my nose and, let's be honest, that might be an improvement.

BROS every time is hockey time but especially tomorrow because our very own Outlander Raptors are playing the Vallo Vipers! We got it all, a D-line that I think could defend literally anything (especially if there were knives involved) and IF on the OFF chance something gets by them, we got the best damn goalie ever, literally, a goddamn brick wall of a goalie. But hey, that's not all, our offensive players are magic on ice (and I'm not just talking about Shitty's flow and 'stache or Lena's lipstick) and make plays happen where there by all reason and logic be none.

(Pst, I heard this game will feature the return of Canada's Sweetheart Jack Bittle-Zimmermann)

And in case that doesn't sell you, our mascot is named fucking T-Wrecks and is a dinosaur I mean, COME ON.

So come and bring signs and the one that makes me laugh the most will get a prize.

It's not a month in Vallo if I don't fear for my life at least once, is it??

Is anybody else being stalked by their college mascot or is this some kind of shapeshifter feeding on my worst nightmares?

( wellie the well is stalking you under the cut )

Uh Hey. It's Jack. So uh- we're doing a fundraiser next month for the Youth Hockey teams of Vallo - it's a big joint thing with all the teams, Outlanders and Vallo natives both. It's Outdoors, at a big open skate at the winter rink they set up in the main city park, so bring yourselves and your kids. There's going to be games and food and Bitty's pie, and everything raised goes towards equipment and upkeep and funds that keep costs low for the kids and their families.

Anyway, yeah. Oh! December 11th. It's an all-day thing, I think? And if you want to volunteer to run a booth or set up a table of things to sell, uhhh let me know and I'll get you in touch with our coordinator? Which is clearly not me, haha.

[FILTERED TO BITTY]

Hey. Can we talk?

With Hannah and Neville gone, the Leaky Cauldron is missing a proprietor. One of you magic folk should probably come claim it before it turns me into a frog or a womp rat or something.

Just let me know a day or so in advance when I need to be out so I can get my stuff together before class.

I'll miss Alexis. I hope that she's happy back where she was before.

I have a lot of excess projects and things I was working on for the Apothecary, so if anyone is looking for lanterns, both papier-mâché moon and suns or the ones with recycled plastic, let me know.

What's everyone doing on Sunday? The only right answer is coming to the hockey game.

haus filter.
It's Wednesday. Wednesday is usually Charlie kicks everyone butt at board games night and I don't see why I can't continue to do that here. 7pm in the living room, if you dare.

Greetings! My name is BFF 3000, now known as Anastasia Barack Obama Yu-Bot, progeny of Murderbot and Morgan Yu. I would appreciate it if you referred to me as Stacey. I chose not to reveal my presence until now, mostly because I have just arrived and also because you all are more 'hot mess' than 'hot catch.'

For the sake of ease, for me, I have indexed and catalogued all of the posts on this network into any of the following categories:

1. Dick-In-Hole (or simply 'Sex')
2. Coffee? Or Tea?
3. Stuffing Food Into My Gaping Maw
4. Drink Drank Drunk
5. HELP
6. Basic Bitches/Generic - per Jack Bittle-Zimmermann

Now, if you would answer some questions for me I would truly appreciate that as well.

1. What would you add to your Babysitter Kit out of all of these: a 'cute' movie, a friendship bracelet, board games, a book?

2. Which club would you most like to join: Debate, Book Club, Theater, Dance, or Model UN?

3. Is Cher Horowitz your Personal Hero, yes or no?

Thank you for your time! Let's be friends!

Grab a coffee or something stronger. I got a text from Care Caroline about what we can only call Vallo being Vallo. She's got her hands f Some of you are likely already aware, so to head off questions and chaos, the DOA can confirm there seems to be some kind of timeslip event happening. Don't freak out if you suddenly have a kid or someone you know isn't the right age. The latter might be easier to adjust to since it's happened at least once before in the time I've been here - but the kid thing may be a bit shocking.

If you need a hand, the DOA has services to help out. That said, though, in an effort to coordinate and assist, we're asking you to chime in here with any reports you want to share so that we can manage resources and get a handle on expectations.



[ooc | this here's the catch-all post, I offered to get one up early for Meghan]

Hey y'all! Exciting news! I know, you're thinking I already shared the fall pie menu—I did!— and it's still available through November! But even better is that hockey season starts in just three weeks! Our home game opener is Sunday, October 24th at Faber, and I'd love to see y'all there cheering us on against the Elvish Eagles, our mortal enemies.

Our team has been working so hard, and it would mean the world for y'all to come out and support them. Of course, if you want to join in on the ice, experience is not necessary! There is still time! You can sign up here! And I'll ask Jack to make your conditioning practice easy so we don't scare y'all off! ♥



[ooc: this is also the reminder that if any of your future kids want to play/be on the team for this game, please sign them up on this too!]

Cool thing about life, how there is always more to learn, yeah? I am not in school for many years, but still I learn new things every day! Like today I learn important lesson:

IF YOU FIND SURPRISE BOX IN WOODS, DO NOT COME NEAR BOX WITHOUT WEAPON.

Because maybe box is not box, but is actually bitey asshole and will try to chew your arm off! This is not good start to morning.

Thanks Tas for not letting me get eaten, thanks Wen Qing for fixing bite! Now I go bury pain in pancakes.

BROS. Bitty gave a shoutout not all that long ago, but this is a reminder that you haven't signed up for hockey and are interested in playing, to let him know. It's wicked fun, no one gives a shit if you haven't played before, just show up ready to work and have a boss ass time.

(But if you're fast as hell, all the better, because ISTG the Elvish Eagles are actual blurs on skates)

As Manager all of the organizational 'stuff' concerning the team falls to me. It's fun because hockey bros are seriously the best bros, and armed with a label maker and a clipboard, I can run the world. Recently, Eric Bittle-Zimmermann, in all of his genius, suggested that the team may need an Assistant Equipment Manager.

(Please note: one can replace our Assistant Manager/Murderer Murderbot, officially the Assistant Manager/Murderer of the team and of our hearts)

After a long brainstorming session over chocolate chip cookies that I think sent me back to the magic of my first Christmas they were that good, we came up with a series of competitions that seem pointless but serve a much deeper meaning and also have an elaborate scoring system.

( Lardo and Bitty Proudly Present: Game of Games )

The person with the highest score ultimately gets the position and the glory that comes with being Assistant Equipment Manager (including your own personal hockey nickname and a one time beer pong tournament bye to the second round) but we all win because Bitty promised baked goods to all competitors.

Questions, comments, concerns, and compliments may be directed to me.

Okay so I got two months left on this cast and finally ran out of this monopoly money that I was given.

Who wants to hire a broken bartender? I'm telling you now that I'm absolutely not going to move around easily for the next few weeks, but my upper body strength is out of this world and I'm great with the books and inventory.

Also, my bartending comes with life advice that you should, frankly, never take and I'm not that great to look at so you never have to worry about me flirting successfully with the customers.

I'm a catch, y'all.

Well, the weather's a bit zesty today, is it not? It's a good thing I look best slightly disheveled, but my saint's talisman got waterlogged so no healing for me or others today until it's less damp.

Anyone else caught out in this nonsense?

Hey y'all! I'm going to make this a quick little update because I know everyone's getting ready in your fancy dress for the charity event tonight (make sure you bid!) But I know it's September and fall is on the horizon, so that means our fall menu is back and ready for orders! (And yes, Thurvishar, the PSL pie is back! ♥)

We'll be switching out a couple more classic staples and savory pies throughout the upcoming months but just know I have y'all covered!

Also, don't forget that hockey season starts back up in October! For those of you who loved it and want to keep yourself on the team, we'll start practices at the end of September and Jack will run y'all through conditioning! If you ever wanted to learn how to play, we take everyone and anyone of any skill set! No judgment! You can sign up here!

See y'all tonight! ♥

[Filtered away from Nursey]

So, uh. What's the best really good date location in Vallo for somebody who doesn't have a ton of money for expensive restaurants? Asking for a friend who possibly looks the same as me, if you happen to see him checking out said places.

I know there's a few, but every time I try to look something seems to happen so I figured I'd ask the masses and hopefully I'm not just cursed?

I woke up this morning and went to go get a bagel from the furry that runs that bagel cart and y'know what happened?

The power of music.

I still don't know what the hell's going on here, but hey, we're living in the Matrix, baby! Anything's possible.

[ooc; Anyone that was near A-Maze-in Bagels around 10 AM this morning, saw Nick pulling off this flashmob. You're free to say you were apart of it! After it was over, he promptly ran into the forest. He is currently in a tree somewhere.]

I made the mistake of thinking I could do Work in full this morning finally because the seed of reversal didn't make my throat bleed which is basic military work. So when I went to get coffee, I came across these little kids playing dodgeball and hey, perfect to test the seed of shielding right?

How do little kids throw so hard and so accurately?