vallo

Has anyone here ever been walking down the street and remembered that time they were in the fake good place and they missed flying day because their soul mate decided they should volunteer to pick up trash and become a better person?

I have. And then I wished I could fly because that's all I ever wanted to do instead of picking up garbage because that sucked.

And that's when I discovered I can fly now. What?!?!

I know today sucks for some of you and I'm sorry if you lost anyone, but...I wanted to request something?

So because it's summer and classes are over, I'm trying out some new projects, so if anyone has any plastics or anything they want to recycle, I can come pick them up, just let me know. There's some cool recycled plastic lanterns I want to try to make.

Also if anyone needs some of my glitter or googly eyes to make their day less sad, let me know. I can donate to a good cause.

Additionally, I saw resin skateboards and you can put things in it and that is also very cool. I can't stop thinking about them.

WHO: Alexis & Cullen
WHAT: Introducing Cullen to the idea of summer vacation! And sunscreen~
WHERE: A nice beach
WHEN: This past weekend sometime
WARNINGS: Just FLUFF, marshmallow-ey fluff
STATUS: Complete

( You're *certain* this isn't magic? )

Alexis and Ambrose.
You're the best bosses in the world. Thank you for getting my shifts covered last minute. I'll owe you both.

Zeke.
Hey, I'm gonna be gone for a week? Make sure Jason doesn't end up in jail again?

Jason.
Hey, I'm going away for a week for a spa trip. Don't end up in jail again?

Marina.
Margo's taking me to a spa week. Try not to miss me too much.

WHO: Alexis & Katherine
WHAT: Interviewing the lovely vampiress for a management position! Or it's not really an interview, it's just them planning the next speed dating event
WHERE: Rose Apothecary
WHEN: Idk today?
WARNINGS: FABULOUSNESS
STATUS: Complete

( PR seems like overtime work in itself here anyway. )

Y'ALL! It has been a minute, hasn't it? First of all, thank you to everyone who handled taking down that awful person who was terrorizing Vallo! Y'all are major heroes in my book, so make sure you come claim your free mini-pie for a job well done! ♥ Kratos, you get whatever you want for the next week! Even if I heard what you did and I think that might have been just a little bit of an overkill

On that note, the pie menu this month is full of all my summer favorites, but y'all are going to have to put in pre-orders and do pick-up and delivery while we get the final details ready on Bitty's Bakes! (Oh goodness, that's me, y'all! My own pie shop, which I cannot have done without my wonderfully perfect husband who looks just absolutely fantastic swinging around a sledgehammer and wearing a hardhat 😏 and not without the help of all my friends at the Haus who have worked non-stop, even when I was recovering in April! :( )

We're doing a soft opening this month, with the grand opening corresponding to a very friendly bake-off with the Muffin Man bakery in July. I had to promise it was friendly because I would do whatever it takes to crush him in Keep your eyes open, your baking chops ready, and your stomachs prepared to eat a ridiculous amount of pie! :)

Speaking of baking, I noticed a lot of you were struggling to cook when we were in the past! I understand it was not an ideal situation, and even I had to improvise, but if y'all need some assistance learning in the present, you know I'm always happy to help you learn from pies, to brownies, to even souffles! We can break in my new kitchen at the shop and use the megaoven Brigitte built for it! 😘

SUMMER MENU!

I guess a week is better than nothing?

Hello, yes, hi. So what's the plan regarding the crazy weirdo in the castle hoarding I guess Avon products and also literal, actual people? I ask because I do PR and damage control and I have to tell you that a shunned fairytale villain suddenly appearing and taking locals hostage isn't a good look. I've issued a few 'we're handling it' statements but I don't actually know how we're handling so can I be filled in?

I mean, I'm totally familiar with this story and I get it - when my boyfriend at the time refused to send a jet for me so I could attend Diddy's dance-all-night fundraiser I was big mad too but the reaction always seemed to be a little extreme to me.

Right. Well. This is different. Not what I was expecting, I have got to say.

When does the torture start? Because honestly, if you think me being here on my own, without the others, is torture, you are sadly mistaken. I have been alone for most of my life and I’m used to it, so you’re going to have to try a bit harder than this new fake neighbourhood if you want to torture me.

I would like to know what happened to Eleanor, Jason and Tehani though, if anyone is able to tell me. Where did the judge send them?

A water dragon, then a sky dragon. All right, so the water dragon was more like a dinosaur, but still. I am clearly not meant to deal with big shit in the past and thanks for the heals. I think I'm just going to drink away the rest of the time we're here. Come get me if you need something.

Tuesday Afternoon

Alexis & Eleanor
"I guess this part of the time traveling experience is okay? I still feel like I’m in a weird Doc Brown movie though."

Civitas | Besties reuniting with strong wine & warm food (But they'd still rather be back in normal Vallo)

( Read more... )

I really wish I was back in the future. Also, can Vallo stop sending me into the past without protections? Cause I've had to run into too many questionable spaces because I've been splashed with water and don't need everyone to see me turn into a mermaid in public. I wish Rikki was here

WHO: Lois Lane-Kent & Alexis Rose
WHAT: Stealing from Karen's ancient ancestor hocking fake healing crystals
WHERE: Civitas
WHEN: Today, the 3rd
WARNINGS: Of course not, and this totally doesn't even count as stealing <.<
STATUS: Complete

( Alexis straightened her shoulders, recalling how the klepto game was played when she was looking over Gucci bags or in Goop’s of Sag Harbor. )

I'm going to the beach if anyone wants to come. The Aquarium is also doing a half-priced Friday thing if you'd prefer to be inside in the AC. I know they've got it on today. Also there's probably plenty of pools to go to as well.

Alexis

But I especially think we should test out your mermaid tail present because why not?

A week ago, I reached my thirty-fifth year. I've found myself thinking about this birthday more than most of my others, largely because it's one that for such a long time I did not expect to see.

Templars don't tend to last long. They die in battle, or lyrium takes their mind, or they're ejected from the order and withdrawal from lyrium takes their mind and body both. A Templar who reaches forty is considered one of the old officers, and I never saw myself becoming one of those.

And yet, here I am. Not only alive, but not staring down a tunnel at inevitable madness or physical deterioration. Doing work that doesn't promise to turn bad or hurt anyone. I have dogs and a girlfriend. This life is so good that I occasionally have to go out and run until I'm soaked through with sweat and on the edge of collapse just to convince myself that it's all real.

Hopefully by thirty-six the strangeness of continuing to live will have worn off a bit.

[Filtered to Max and Dorian]
Thank you both. If not for your friendship and support, I doubt I would have made it this far.
[/filter]

[Filtered to Alexis]
I love you.
[/filter]

I know people are raging out and turning into puppets right now which is so on brand for this place I'm actually having a moment about it, but! We have stuff to help at the Apothecary. Room sprays which make your place smell good and calm your Hulk moments - lavender, sandalwood, and chamomile to name a few and it's legit because scent relaxation and mood lifting is real. Your nose can do some wild stuff for your body and you don't even need magic for it! Everything comes in candle form too, FYI.

Also I don't mean to sound like Brenda with the essential oils pyramid scheme; I'm not saying this will cure the common cold, I'm just saying it all helps your pillowcases not smell like sweat.

Oh! And if you're friends with my merm bestie, Cleo, please know that her birthday is April 19th so I'll be throwing her a pizza party at Dough Bros that night. It's really tiny so we'll probably just end up taking over the place and having fun. Come by around 7 if you want to celebrate Cleo!

ETA:

If cute animal gifs and pictures (spontaneous joy??) help you not be a puppet, ( click here! )

WHO: Cullen & Alexis
WHAT: Alexis gets a canon update via dreams!
WHERE: Skyhold, their room
WHEN: Tonight (pretty late)
WARNINGS: Nah, just schmoop
STATUS: Complete

( Garbage fish. )

Saturday Afternoon

Alexis & Eleanor
"Honestly, I could totally come up with some killer flavor names too - like Blind Dating Leonardo DiCaprio or First Kiss with Jared Leto."

Yogurt Yoghurt Yogurté | Ridiculous Frozen Yogurt

( Read more... )

private to skyhold residents + employees + people who crash there regularly, cimerfella's thieves game-playing group, and any of cullen's friends who may be on this filter idk:

So! Cullen's birthday is next weekend. I'm planning to do a little something-something for him at Skyhold on Sunday. Just like, a cute party at the Herald's Rest - some drinks and food and maybe some games. We could play card games or Cimerfella's game again? He also wants a cake with strawberries so can someone help me make a strawberry shortcake or something? Confession time: I'm hopeless in the kitchen so you'd have your work cut out for you. I'd hit up a bakery but I really want to do it myself for that special love touch - only if I don't set the kitchen on fire. If I do we can just buy a cake and pretend like I made it, thanks.

And let me know if you're in for party times. It's the last day of the Wicked show, so we can always do it afterward later in the evening.

Okay I know it's April Fool's and everything but I promise I'm not kidding. Yogurt, Yoghurt, Yogurté is here from the good place!! Well, the fake good place. It doesn't matter! And it has all the flavors?? I don't know, man, the menu is crazy. I totally got Full Cellphone Battery and even though my phone's only at like 12% I'm not even worried about it.

So you should check it out and if you want recommendations, I can go with you because no, I'm totally not going to eat way too much fro-yo now.