[Posted sometime later this evening after the battle with the Vegetation Vermin]

Hello? Huh. It really does type everything I say. That's fucking handy.

Wait. Can I say fucking?

Huh. Guess so.

I was told yesterday that I should come on here and make some kind of introduction and since I woke up this today still here, I guess I probably should. Hi. I'm Rowen and I have questions

Or, after today I guess one huge question: Are you all sure that there isn't some kind of evil force at work here? 'Cause those plant things seemed pretty freaking evil to me.

House of Danvers-Vance-Khan officially has a new addition thanks to Vallo deciding we all needed alien kitties in this world.

I even got the chance to name her which I'm sure Carol regretted the second she asked but OH WELL!

Everyone, say hello to Galadriel. :3

( Cut for pic )

The last of the Flerkens we'd managed to gather up and bring to the Castle disappeared around midnight last night. I got to witness that wide awake - one second they were climbing all over me, the next they were gone. Almost like Minus the d It looks like they were just temporary visitors after all. They had a great time while they were here, and I know they soaked up every bit of affection they got from everyone who came by to hang out; thanks to those who brought them in and came by to play with them.

The kitten Goose brought back to the house was still there when I got home, though, so I'm guessing any home invaders you brave and/or crazy people took in are sticking around. If anyone can't handle full-time Flerken ownership, let me know. And don't mind Goose prowling around to check on her spawn sometimes. She's her own boss, what can I say. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Soooo... if anyone wants to come help round up some of these tentacle cats at Boyd's that'd be great. I counted at least eight, possibly more. Five for sure have run off somewhere in the shop with various tools which I'd love to get back to, you know, do work. Menaces. Completely adorable, but menaces still the same.

ATTENTION ALL THOSE WHO HAVE COME ACROSS KITTENS WITH MOUTH TENTACLES!

Some of you might remember when I introduced my cat (Goose) about two years ago. Goose is an alien in the shape of a cat known as Flerken. All of the info on Thor's post is true of her species back home. Here in Vallo, Goose's more toxic elements - both the claws and more extreme uses of tentacles - have been dulled, presumably by whatever kind of magic Vallo likes to use to keep us here. I'm pretty confident the same will hold true for any of the kittens' toxic elements, too, and they should be ultimately harmless.

After rounding up the 39 begging for attention from Thor, I've picked out enough familiar patterns to say these ARE Goose's kittens. I don't know how many are here, but at last count, I'm seeing mention of 48 - that includes 39 from Thor, 4 from Atreus, 1 from Orym, 1 from Wanda, 1 from Darlington, and 2 from Ty. There could be up to 69 more running around Vallo.

If you've found one (or one has found you) and you feel comfortable holding onto them for the time being, great, but please drop a line here to let me know where you have them, just in case. If you don't feel comfortable, that's fine, too. Again, drop a line here, and I'll come by to pick them up. We have a safe space to keep them until we figure out what's going on.

Please don't attempt to kill them.

Carol, have you checked on Goose lately? If so, did they seem...pregnant?

Because there's a gaggle of flerken at the base of this tree I'm at and I'm only counting around 39 of them. I suspect there's more elsewhere since they're capable of laying up to 117 eggs, but I'm hesitant to leave this tree until this group is contained because at least their focus is on me at the moment.

Team B, I'm sending you my coordinates. I will need assistance containing this group. They have a mess of tendrils that protrude from their mouths that they use to eliminate their opponents by eating them and their scratches are toxic to humanoids. We're going to try not to harm them, but we need to herd them away from the public.

Anyone that comes across a seemingly innocent, unclaimed kitten may not want to startle them.

Ever since New Year's Eve people have had ideas about what new "fun" toppings they can request on pizza like they did at the charity event. Too much warm fruit. And finally today someone said they wanted strawberries, peaches, and pickled radishes with scrambled eggs and I just

I no longer work at Nino's. I quit. It was that or jail. Find a new place to knife fight out back.

FRIENDS OF GANSEY (BUT GANSEY CAN ALSO SEE.)

A certain someone's birthday is next Wednesday. Now that I have oodles of free time, you're cordially invited to clear the evening. We're doing whatever Gansey wants.

Would anyone care to see a family cat picture before the kittens started sprouting their wings? Now they are learning to fly and every picture of them is a blur.

( I assume everyone will answer ja. )

[FILTERED TO ESSEK]

Are you feeling a little better now that you have stuck your hands in moist soil?

Finn got to hang out with Molly, our tortoise, this morning. The giggles when we helped them hand her some lettuce to snack on was easily one of the cutest sounds I've ever heard in my life. She's pretty cute for a reptile, too. Look at her.



Oh, and - Happy (late) New Year to everyone!

I don't know about you guys, but I'm kind of pissed about missing Fall entirely. And other things, like a wedding.

Are you fucking kidding me, Vallo? Do you just take anyone I get close to here? Am I supposed to just 'stick to my world?' Because that's what it feels like. Fucking place, fucking disappearances, fucking everything.

If anyone feels the need to respond to this, I won't guarantee fast answers. Me and pizza and alcohol are going to go rage on the beach.

[Friends/Family Minus Talcott]

Tomorrow's our little baby boy's birthday. Do you have any idea how difficult it is to set up a cactuar-themed birthday at a bowling alley? (More than I expected, that's the answer.)

So noon to four tomorrow, don't miss it!

Okay, now that I'm no longer 'fuck it all and let the world burn' mode. Which, sorry Keith.

1. If you know anyone who wants to manage a club or two lmk. Dorian's is mine again and so is Lux now but
I already have two full time jobs and am not looking for another. Also the Speakeasy, but thankfully Rory's business partner is heading up that.

2. Lucifer had a crap load of clothes and furniture and alcohol (but Roz and I took that). So open house, come for what you'd like. I'll probably donate all his books and scrolls and stuff to the Library. And I'm keeping the piano and some of the armory stuff from Maze, but well, anyone want some really cool weapons? IDK. Its a treasure trove of stuff from the beginning of well, existence, to now.

3. Also, who's up for drinks later tonight? Maybe some karaoke. Eli and I got parts in Jagged Little Pill and there will be ridiculous celebrating.

You know, Vallo, you're doing a great job of pushing me into having a damn villain era.

I guess these skeletons have a very specific idea of what a king should be like and sprinkled in cheeto dust before noon is not it. Anybody heard of a King Ashurbanipal?

you guys, art class critique is the worst.

it's basically what it sounds like: your whole class gets together and critiques each other's work. half of what people say is artsy bullshit that they think sounds smart, a quarter of it is mean just for the sake of being mean, another twenty percent is completely insane, and then the final five percent is actually useful commentary on the work.

someone told me "i hate that you used paint." IN PAINTING CLASS. another guy commented on the raw sexuality of my painting OF A CAVE. and i didn't even get the worst of it! they made this one girl cry, and like, no, her painting wasn't that good, but it wasn't that bad either.

i need a nap. or maybe half a chocolate cake.

( Read more... )

WHO: Iris Amicitia and Abi Blyg
WHAT: A beach walk turns into a meeting with a mischievous water elemental
WHEN: August 16-ish
WHERE: The Vallo shoreline
WARNINGS: N/A

( The Daemon Slayer was promptly splashed with seawater, an act of war followed by a giggle.  )

[ooc: This is a voice recording with a lot of chaos in the background. Noct sounds strained but determined. All replies will also be voice recordings.]

Uh so I need back up at 45th and Grand. Spotted a bunch of elementals making the flooding worse and terrorizing a group of trapped people. I backed them off and I'm holding the line but I can't get these people out of here and stop these jerks from doing more damage at the same time.

[There's a crash and Noct makes a pained noise but keeps talking like it didn't happen.]

Some of the people here are injured. I tried to give them the healing potions I had on me but most of them got destroyed. So yeah.

Hurry? Thanks.

So, those of you with more experience with this, what's the usual reaction when Vallo takes away your spiky-haired best friend who is also your only employee? Is it stress eating? Because I'm stress eating.