vallo

Alright, not that I've got any room to talk since there's actually a wasteland in Thedas called the Fallow Mire and then let's not even discuss the Exalted Plains - too many Orlesians, too many demons, hard to tell which is worse. But for whomever owns the island that's a literal, actual rubbish heap? It's here off the coast of Vallo, nestled in amongst the other islands.

Was sailing about on a Booze Cruise this morning when me and my stalwart crew spotted the new discovery. I just wanted to check if it and the smell belong to anyone before I headed back to see what I could scavenge from it. I'm a pirate, we're always looking for treasure.

WHO: Diego & Isabela
WHAT: COUPLE BEHEADING TIME
WHERE: Out in the woods
WHEN: Tuesday, sometime, as shit is hitting the fan
WARNINGS: Nah, just gore and like, blood from all parties involved
STATUS: Complete

( It was simultaneously the coolest thing and the grossest thing ever. Huh. )

[ Sword Lady Enthusiasts + Baby Lesbians/Bisexual/Questioning Women ]

I got a couple of comments from you lot about wanting to see my sword, but I got distracted by showing Vanya a koala gif and things all went to hell. Not literally - hope none of you are having a bad day from that... creepy... forest... thing. ANYWAY, well, there's nothing I love more than showing my two-hander off - she's a claymore, massive, rude - and I'd be happy to take her out on a playdate if you're willing.

Meet me at the training grounds Wednesday and we'll find a nice little place. This filter's ladies only; I figure we get enough of men making "hur hur my sword is a dick" jokes in our day to day (which, to be honest, I appreciate) so if you bring a guest make sure she identifies as a woman.

And if you wanna talk ladies kissing ladies, who am I to stop you? Forsooth, I could not.

WHO DOESN'T KNOW WHO WOLVERINE IS? What? I mean, I guess if you're super old and never read things, I guess. Or maybe you're from a weird world without Wolverine, WHICH IS STUPID. Worlds need to get it together. WOLVERINE!

Diego, Isabella? What is an MMF video? Is that like fighting? I thought it was MMA?

It's now March, which means only TWO MONTHS (not counting this one, duh) until my birthday!! Well, I mean, it's late May, but whatever! I am just gonna tell you that my interests are pokemon cards, tsum tsums, cool animal-themed hats, cake, and anything Dazzler. I guess that last one's not likely because she's not even here. LAME. But you know. You're welcome in advance for not having to think too hard about future presents. :)

BUT SPEAKING OF POKEMON CARDS! Hey! Henry! Wanna come on a raid with me later? I just got a Raichu!

WHO: Isabela & Ava
WHAT: Meeting in a dive bar!
WHERE: The city (...a dive bar)
WHEN: Tonight?
WARNINGS: TBD but probs not
STATUS: In progress (continued in comments)

( there's whiskey in the jar )

I've done some research about the Day of Valentine's so I know what it bloody well is now, thanks to the Google and also asking you lot - that being said, what better way to spend the day then romantically cruising between the islands? Molly just loaded quite a bit of rum onto the Siren's Call II, enough to last for awhile so booze cruises are open. The booze is admittedly optional, I don't force anyone to imbibe alcohol against their will. The goal is simply fun and fresh air and maybe some fishing! Impress your loved ones by catching a big floppy thing.

Interestingly, I also had a gift show up from home. It was once given to me by Hawke, and it's a Rivaini talisman - Rivain is where I'm from, you see. But it's meant to bring about love and boost fertility, so Maker only knows I don't need to keep it in my flat. If anyone would like to purchase it as a gift I'll be bringing to Glorious Purveyors so see what price they ask for it. I figure someone who wants an occupied womb will call upon its magic eventually.

ETA: Molly also reminded me about the hot chocolate cruise! That's exactly what it says on the tin, hot chocolate instead of booze. For the younger Vallo denizens.

For those of you that attend Fight Club, is there anything you'd like to see? 2v2 fights? Adding in blindfolds or obstacles in the ring? Would it be something you would be interested in occasionally? Or keep Fight Club the same as it always is on its normal evening, but add in an extra for various other events?

We're always looking to keep it interesting and improve, so please feel welcome to voice any suggestions.

To those of you that are newer arrivals, my brother Jacob and I run The Underground, a training club in the warehouse district. During the day, we offer classes and one-on-one training in several forms of hand-to-hand combat, and (usually) the third Saturday of every month is an evening fight club event. Sign up ahead of time, put your name in a hat, and be paired with someone random in the ring. It has a cash prize, there's a full bar and you can gamble away at your heart's greatest desire.

[CHAOS CREW (Jacob, Serefin, Diego, Gideon, Isabela, Ostyia)]

And to add onto that, I had an idea for next month? Valentine's Day is approaching and people might like to do something with significant others or friends and maybe even like our normal pairings? But the idea I had was to do a Pillow Fight Club for that evening, pair people off or let them sign up together, supply the pillows and decorate the ring.

If that's too ridiculous, I expect you all to tell me so I can bin the idea before I purchase two dozen pillows.

I'm pretty fucking sure I found everyone, and let me tell you that before I say where they are, I KNOW it sounds fucking ridiculous, I don't need anyone to tell me how fucking ridiculous it is, I GOT IT.

After Jacob and I murdered like, a billion monsters or some shit, we were literally walking and there was some weird ass store fucking Hansel and Gretel cottage bullshit thing. So we go in because what, we're not going to go in, come on now. There's some weird ass lady at the counter, what the fuck were we even doing there, I'm walking around, Jacob's doing some song and dance thing to her after I maybe drew ten knives and threatened the shit out of her and not even a goddamn blink scariest shit because, the fuck, everything is weird as shit but we're like, DAMN CONVINCED there's a reason we're in there to find something.



Anyway, too many words, our people are in a snowglobe. I don't know how I know this, but I know it. and then we got the fuck out of dodge and tripped over each other getting out



Also you magic types have like, 12 hours to figure this out before I just fucking smash the thing like I know will work but I don't want to hear everyone going BUT DIEGO YOU'RE SO RECKLESS yeah well too fucking bad.

WHO: Isabela & Molly
WHEN: December 29th
WHERE: The docks & the Siren’s Call II
WHAT: Loading barrels of rum and coming up with a clearly genius future endeavor.
WARNINGS: A lot of cuteness and general past trauma for Molly.

( Bandanas and pirate hats are not required )

Jesus Christ on a cracker WHY

Right, who lost an actual fucking talking head? It talks a lot, so come claim it in the Underground. It's on a ring post.

Oh wait, he says he's a he and his name is Mimir like in the Poetic Edda, Prose Edda and Heimskringla screw you, Dad, I remembered that AND knew how to spell it

Okay, great, someone come claim your head.

Oh, something brilliant happened. My wall from home got here! I've got all these clippings and that, Annie used to say it was like a vision board, but it's all the stuff I like to look at and think about. And now it's here on my wall in my apartment.

I am missing a few pieces so if anyone sees magazine clippings popping up anywhere, let me know, yeah?

Makes it feel like home to look up at it from my bed, think about the kind of life I want to have.

What sorts of things make you feel like this is home now?

Shit, probably going to have to cut my 3:15 run. Fucking snow.

Could go again right now.

Probably shouldn't.

Eh.

WHO: Isabela & Vanya
WHAT: Prepping side dishes and bonding!
WHERE: Morningside
WHEN: Backdated to Thanksgiving Day
WARNINGS: Not really!
STATUS: Complete

( Hopefully Diego hadn’t rigged the door somehow to go off just from someone knocking on it, though part of her wondered if he had knives rigged up to go flying if he needed them to. )

So I know I ain't the first person to ask but there isn't a way to get any message back to where we came from? Been calling the number to the house and bothering the pants off whoever has that line here in this world.

"How many times do I have to tell you, there isn't any Hal here!" the lady yelled at me last time.

But maybe next time I try it'll slip through like we did, yeah? If whole people can go through worlds then why not a phone call?

Dunno. Thought I'd try it today. Lonesome, like. Ought to get a job, quit being a layabout. It's been a few days, plenty long enough.

Jesus tap dancing Christ on a cracker

Okay, who lost a donkey? And I'm not being funny either, when I'm funny, I'm fucking hilarious.

I mean an actual goddamn donkey.

( It looks like this )

It's by the apartments.

Do not consider this an invitation for small talk

Yesterday was my very first 'Thanksgiving' and we have tons of leftovers, which I'm gathering is par the course. It was fun, however. I'm pleased that there are many holidays here that match the Thedosian tradition of stuffing one's face.

Alright, so rather than mope about Hawke being gone, I've decided to pursue new opportunities. Or actually, it was more like I went to the Crossed Quills to drink heavily and met some would-be sailors, the rough and rugged type (one was a satyr) who feel the same call to the sea as me. I mentioned I had a ship and our woes were over. We'll be looking for more to join the crew, but as of now - Siren's Call II will be in business, ferrying passengers to and from the islands. Galdin Quay is a particular hotspot, if you feel like deep sea diving or snorkeling. Contact me, Isabela, to take a journey on Isabela's Booze Cruise.

Though I realize we're all busy stabbing eyeballs right now, but you know. When that's done! Stay mostly safe out there, loves.

ISABELA + DIEGO

Don’t go telling other people I said that though, then they’ll all bother me to say it to them.

WHAT: Having an Important Talk
WHERE: Morningside
WHEN: After the ghosties have disappeared
WARNINGS: Lots of feelings
STATUS: Complete!
( Read more... )

Okay, sure, but where are my super cool reunions with invisible people? Like hopefully my friends, though. But also my pare No one Uggggggggghhhhhhhhhh OR OLD LACE! :) DOOMBOT! I think Doombot would be the coolest invisible friend. Gib would be all right, too. Hopefully he doesn't need like souls to feast on in his invisible state. Always hungry. It's too bad Doombot can't bring his greenbean casserole or his potatoes. Lol. Imagine all of them at once. "I AM DOOM! DO NOT INTERRUPT ME AGAIN!" Man. I miss Doombot even more now. We don't even get any weird complaints about Reed Richards.

CROWLEY

Um. Okay. So I got your Tsum tsums. Where should I bring them?s

ISABELA

Is it weird to miss your parents when they murdered people and probably would have murdered all your friends? I just don't want them to be like...that gross Hotel version of my parents, though. Feelings are dumb.

Yessssssssss! MY HATS ARE HERE! This has been THE BEST! Hopefully my Tsum-Tsums will be next OR MY POKEMON CARDS!