vallo

HELLO THIS IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN WHATEVER IS GOING ON RIGHT NOW

BLOODY FUCKING MARY WITH HER BLOODY FUCKING CURSE IS UPON US.

ONCE NANDOR RELENTLESS IN HIS STUPIDITY OPENED THE ELECTRONIC MAIL AND RELEASED HER AND NOW SHE HAS RETURNED

LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT HILLARY WHO DID NOT FORWARD THE ELETRONIC LETTER AND THEN BLOODY MARY CAME TO HER IN HER PARTY OF SLUMBER AND MURDERED HER IN HER SLEEPING BAG WITH HER EYES TORN OUT AND A MESSAGE ON THE MIRROR THAT SAID 'ALL YOU HAD TO DO WAS FORWARD THIS TO TEN PEOPLE'

CURSES ARE NOT TO BE TRIFFLED WITH EVEN FOR ME THE QUEEN OF VALLO VAMPIRES.

MOM? Do you want me to just off this person FOR you???? WHO IS IT????

So that is what kind of Monday it is going to be like, eh? Dragon friend, do not worry, they are all very dangerous and remarkable.

[FILTERED TO ESSEK]

Is there ah- something you wanted to tell me?

[OOC: Posted around 4:30PM Vallo time, an hour after the blackout.]



Hello, testing the network? We've been told that it has been restored, so please chime in if you see this.

In case it's working: from what we've been told, there was a widespread power outage across all of Vallo. Communication was key to restore first, but work is being done to fix the rest of the electricity by the experts. No ETA just yet on when it will be back up, but the word is that it may take some time as the source of the outage has yet to be pinpointed.

We are working on putting together basic supplies to help, in case this goes into the night. Feel free to stop by the DOA, as we've got some candles, flashlights, blankets, easy to prep food, and such here to hand out.

BELLS HELLS

Are you all okay? I guess this isn't that different than home, but I wanted to check in since we've gotten kind of used to modern conveniences and all.

SENDING STONE TO DORIAN

Hey, you okay? Check the network or just let me know here. I know you're probably fine, but you know that I worry. Love you.

Well, this certainly wasn't on my list of things to do today.

Granted, I've seen some pretty weird crap. This maybe breaks into the top ten. Maybe. I'm still weighing somethings before I finalize the list.

I'll work on the list after I take a shower. And maybe a nap.

Anyway, I might as well introduce myself, since I'm apparently going to be stuck here for awhile. I'm Buffy Summers.

So by now ah- most of you are aware we had a situation at the Library. We still don't have all of the details - I don't know if we ever will, but what we do know is this:

Ashurbanipal, King of Assyria, approached the library this morning, and challenged King Noctis in an attempt to rule Vallo? Unaware that Noctis is not the King of Vallo.

He threatened Nancy, and the Library wards went defensive, one of the skeletons was killed in the mess, and the King took that as a challenge.

The library went into lockdown mode, and there was a fight. I do believe they underestimated a whole group of librarians.

Nancy was able to knock the amulet off of the King's neck, and that was when the skeletons all disappeared? We have it now, but the amulet is damaged, and the king is gone. I put it in a protected vault for the moment but we'd feel more comfortable if one of the covens takes it, so we're going to reach out to them later for that.

We do have some casualties and people are being taken to the clinic now, but I don't think anything was fatal. Mike, Darlington took Nancy there just a few minutes ago and you may want to visit.

Full disclosure that I am also on my way there now, but I was told by triage that it "should be an easy heal". I didn't even realize I just had a

If anyone has any other information to share, we'd love to hear it at the library, since we'll be documenting this in its entirety.

Tags: !: network post, critical role: orym, stranger things: mike wheeler, the last binding: edwin courcey, the raven cycle: blue sargent, the raven cycle: matthew lynch, the raven cycle: richard campbell gansey, the raven cycle: ronan lynch, voltron: keith kogane, ₴ inactive: alex stern, ₴ inactive: brigitte lindholm, ₴ inactive: darlington, ₴ inactive: joshua rosfield, ₴ inactive: nikolai lantsov (2), ₴ inactive: noctis lucis caelum (2), ₴ inactive: prompto argentum (2), ₴ inactive: tex kogane

I know its frowned on to drink at work but I will give pretty much anything you can think of if someone will bring me a bottle of something. Because it is way too early in the week for this much chatting.

I still have a large piece of kraken meat taking up space in Brigitte's freezer. I don't know how long kraken meat keeps for and I think it's time to give Brigitte her space back, so tonight I'll be at [name of beach] with a bonfire to cook up this hunk of meat and find out what it tastes like.

If anyone wants to give it a try, please join me. I have a pretty good appetite, but there's no way I'm going to be able to eat it all. And if kraken isn't your thing, I'll have some weanies to roast too (that's what they're called, right? Weanies?)

Also booze and I promise it's not fish flavored.

Hi. I'm back.

I guess things are still completely fucking lunatic here.




...

Thanks for making sure Darlington didn't suffocate in his nautical-themed sweater vests or whatever while I was out.

Hey assholes don't forget that Fight Club is on Saturday at the Underground.

Yeah, it's a fight club, the title is what it is.

No, you can't use your fantastic amazing life changing magic, I don't make the rules I only enforce them.

Yeah, you will probably not win on your first attempt or even tenth attempt, whatever, get over it and shut up, we all have a good time.

If you have questions, someone will probably answer them.

God, I'm fucking amazing at PR.

Chaos Crew

Lila and I were thinking about going away for the weekend of our birthday, and we don't trust anyone but you guys to watch Gracie. It's a lot to ask, but she's also the best fucking baby ever and she's comfortable with you all.

You idiots can say no, it's fine, we'll just take her with us.

It has been just over a fortnight since I found myself here in Vallo and I must say it has been a rather interesting time. Torgal has been enjoying exploring the woods and fighting the basilisks since his own arrival, though I suspect he very much misses Clive we both do -

It is still strange to try to wrap my head around certain things here. To see people living for the sake of just that, and not constantly just trying to survive. I will admit, despite assurances that somehow we all exist both here and where we come from, I still find myself feeling quite guilty over my presence here. That it is a break from my duties back home that I perhaps do not deserve. I imagine I am not alone in this feeling and that it might be something that may come with time. Though I doubt the feeling would every entirely go away.

I have immensely been enjoying the different foods here, and I am certain I have only scratched the surface on that and would take any recommendations that anyone was inclined to offer.

Look.

I know there's ways to make this whole fucking paralyzed-by-a-basilisk-shithead thing go away, but I won't pretend I know much about magic to actually know how that shit works, so if anyone can point me in a direction, I would really like to use my arm again. It's kind of dead weight right now, which does mean it's kind of great to swing around as a club when you take down the basilisk-shithead that did it to you in the first place, but my body is enough without pretty sure this is going to get fucking old fucking quick.

Oh and thanks in advance, all that.

Also, people that have the joy of living with me, there's a dead basilisk in our backyard. You're fucking welcome.

Okay. So funny story. I found an injured? basilisk in the forest, and I was helping it and making it a friend, when it's mate came up behind me and hey it's a good thing I have really good reflexes cause I dodged at the last minute and managed to mitigate some of it! It wasn't even that bad, just on my side.


But then I started turning uh to stone? So for the last hour I've been in the forest kind of stuck here because I figured Fen would come looking for me and I didn't want to admit this to Lance but then another wolf came up? Not one of mine! He's friendly and helped me get my phone out of the not-stoned pocket with my free hand and I think he's looking for his friend? He says his name is Torgal.

Don't tell dad about this post please.

Note to self: When the little piece of paper in the geocache box tells you, "don't put the ring on, it's cursed" - don't put the ring on, it's cursed. Sure, it's the curse of a thousand hives and not something terrible (like death) but still. Make better choices, Kate of the Future.

But thanks, Adam! Geocaching was fun, let's do it again.

FILTERED TO NATASHA ROMANOFF:

I miss you. 🥺

[DECAY FILTER] [deleted]

Today was the day from all of my nightmares rolled into one and I am already day drunk how are you guys Sorry if you got stuck behind my mom getting her double espresso whatthefuckever this morning I bet she was a Karen literally her name is Karin and it's fucking fitting I promise

'Sup, Outlanders of Vallo. I'm Eli Grimsbane, born and raised in Vallo & a member of the Ankou coven. I've met some of your pretty faces and made out with a few too, but then I took a leave of absence and found some trouble along the way. Brought that trouble BACK with me and now I'm teaching them about all the shit us mere mortals get up to. Tacos, donuts, BBQ last night (thanks for the blast, sorry if you got growled at), next stop is karaoke.

Which The Spectrum's hosting tonight, so if you want to come along and see two people that know no modern music get up on stage and sing, that's the ultimate goal for the night.

Also if anybody's got any leads on cheap apartments for a starving artist native & only partially employed friends, I'll hook you up with some magic mushrooms or weed.

How far back in time does Vallo pull people from? I think I saw an ancient Assyrian (possibly Sumerian? I'm not an expert on the period) walking very purposefully through the town this morning. I thought about asking him, then recalled the elephant's 'satiable curiosity and decided I should probably not. (Kipling is problematic, but I retain my childhood fondness for the Just So Stories nonetheless).

[Filtered to the Great Library]
The east wing bathroom poltergeist is back. Gansey, do you think you could shoo him off until the exorcist can get here? I've put up the Out of Order sign in the meantime in hopes that no one else gets sprayed in the face by the bathroom sink.

I know that flood was hella doozy and all and some cleaning is still going BUT... I am still down for doing an end of the summer group BBQ and bonfire night if anyone is up for it.

Good morning, fellow Outlanders,

I have been informed it is customary to introduce oneself to the community here. It is a fascinating thing, truly. The closest comparison I could find was a Stolas, though they are not nearly as complex as this appears to be. Instant communication to others in the palm of one's hand, how much grief this could have saved on many of my journeys.

I am Joshua Rosfield. I found myself upon your shores yesterday and one of yours, Thor, was kind enough to
assist me in getting my bearings.

So far what I have learned of your Vallo, it seems quite different than Valisthea where I am from, though I imagine that must be the same for more than a few of you as well. It was mentioned that the worlds we all come from are quite varied, I would be curious to hear about some of them.

Thor has let me know that our leaving here is something out of our control, and while I admit that fills be with no small amount of trepidation, I have been told many of you have used this opportunity to carve out new lives. I commend you all for such perseverance.

I am very much looking forward to learning more of you all, and of Vallo in general.

Regards,
Johsua Rosfield.

tw: discussion of pregnancy in comments

Things I didn't miss:

Nearly burning down the house trying to make a Thanksgiving dinner.

Things I am missing:

Black Friday. I need new boots and do not want to pay full retail thank you very much.

((pls to ignore the tag dump on this))