Network

I went by the library today to return a book that I thought might be overdue, so I took it in to the counter and found out that apparently they'd never actually checked it out to me. I'm not sure whether this means I need to pay more attention at the library, whether the librarian does, or both of us do. I do know that she seemed not at all amused by my joke about if I'd known that I'd have kept it. Because clearly I'm the type of person who's going to steal a library book after making a point of going in to return it just in case there was a fine. I don't understand some people. I just honestly don't understand them.

Well, we're back in California. Unpacked, jet lagged, and mildly depressed. Paris is such a lovely city and I miss it already.

Anyone else ever wake up from one of those dreams with a pounding headache just because of everything that happened in them? Pretty sure aspirin isn't going to do anything to this one either.

I was right about who would figure out that I was a ghost first though - it was Claire. She came downstairs at sunrise one day and saw me "die" again - after I begged her not to tell Shane and Eve about me. And if that wasn't enough - this crazy vampire named Brandon followed Eve and Claire home so now he knows where they live, and that Shane's there too since Brandon grabbed him to use as leverage or some shit like that when Shane came out.

Guess ghost me is a match for him. Either that or I surprised him by reaching out to grab Shane and pull him back in the house. And I'm apparently not all that sane myself since I thought threatening Brandon was a brilliant plan.

I did do one smart thing though - I told Claire how I ended up as a ghost and what Brandon is so she could at least try to protect herself from him. And made her promise to stop me if I started wanting to drink blood.

Japan is amazing. There is so much to do and see, and the city is brilliant at night. I don't think they ever sleep.

I can't wait to get to Tahiti. We need a week of R and R.

I don't want to dream anymore.

I swear, these dreams are either comical or life threatening.... Sometimes, even a mix of both.

I've spent the last couple of weeks trying to come to terms with the most recent change the dreams have bestowed on me and it's a slow process. My illness appears to have been put on hold as I've become, what is known in my dreams world as, a Silent Brother. They are former Shadowhunters who serve as archivists and medics of the Nephilim. Because of my illness though, I'm not a full Silent Brother. Either way, it's not something that is easy to adjust to and I want to feel horrible for putting Will and Tessa through this, but it's as if my feelings have been muted from the transformation. I can't even talk to my parents, because they would know something is wrong.