[Filtered away from the Mikaelsons & Marcel]
More dreams of the past. It is truly unusual to see myself in such curious outfits. And now I am in New Orleans. I am apparently well known for my suits even in the dreams. I believe it was, "Original vampire, always wears suits. Of course I know who you are". Some things are rather the same.
Some things seem rather different
My brother seems to have gotten a girl pregnant, which is impossible for a vampire, but something to do with his being a hybrid seems to have made it possible. I showed the girl Hayley our entire history. Once that was over, I was informed that I was there to make Niklaus do what the witches wanted of him. Naturally Niklaus does not believe that he is having a child, nor does he care to be told what to do. He doesn't even care that he has a child. Or rather, he refuses to care that he has one. I think I am forcing him to care in the end. Pretending that a baby can fix everything. As if a child could be our saving grace. As if we should ask a child to save us.
I am easily manipulated by the idea of family. Not that this is at all surprising given my history. Why be any different?
I am exhausted just watching myself make bad decisions all the time. I fear it will be an ongoing pattern considering it has been going on for this long already. I truly wish sometimes that I could actually drink enough for it to do anything. Alas.
Naturally, other things do not change and I was daggered again
. What a true delight. Again with the talk about how love does not bring you power and family and mercy make you weak.