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Hello, Valarnet. A friend recommended this place to me and I thought why not? My name's Match, and I'm a model and an aspiring writer. I've got one book out and hopefully will follow with more.

I'm starting classes at UoC: Irvine, this fall, and have lived around here most of my life. I just wanted to pop on, say hello, and see what sorts are hanging about on here.

Hullo, all. I just got invited to this network. I'm Sebastian Vael; I'm from Scotland, over in the States working for my father's company. My father is a Scottish peer, but I hope you lot will at least get to know me before writing me off as a complete posh idiot. I'm only half of one, you see. Hehe.

So. Today, I accidentally saw a stuntman's bum. For whatever reason, he has a tattoo of a pirate queen on it. And it looks exactly like me in my dreams. I'm amused, to say the least.

You know, I rather like my dreams. I could do way worse than dreaming I'm an immortal witch.

Is it wrong to ship your boyfriend and one of your best friends? I mean, obviously, boyfriend/me is my OTP, but augh the slash writes itself.

I need a fucking drink. No, fuck it, I need to get drunk. I mean really drunk. Forget-shit-going-on-in-your-life, dance on tables, wake up with a lawn gnome in a house you've never seen, in apart of L.A. you've never been, kind of drunk.

This requires some of you to come with, so start lining up and we're going.

I had one of the Dreams last night.

I was in a place called Kirkwall, drinking in a bar called the Hanged Man. You both were there. And we'd gotten to talking. You agreed to help me out with an issue, and just ... I don't know. You felt like friends.

Have you ever dreamt of a Rivaini pirate queen?

I was told I should introduce myself. You can call me Thirteen.

I hope my friends are still okay. Hawke? Bethy? Varric? Isabela? Barbara? Billy? Obi? Fenris? Oh, there are a lot of people to worry about! And I'm sure I'm forgetting some. :-/

[Not viewable by non-canon puncturable Dragon Age characters]

Why can't I flirt with Varric?! >:(

You know who deserves a holiday? Room service waiters. Thank you, room service waiters, for tolerating seeing people in various states of drunkenness, undress, or all of the above. This tip's for you.

I think I've fallen asleep twice already. I slept on the plane, I thought that would be enough! So much jetlag.

I miss my bed~

So I'm kinda sad I missed the whole Halloween Trick or Treat thing this year. Kinda passed out on the couch with the dog and that was the end of it.

Speaking of dogs, anyone wanna go to the dog park sometime soon, get a little running around done, meet people and dogs, hang out? Mom, James, you guys need to meet Sylvio anyway. Anyone else is totally welcome, too. Let me know and we can pick a date! I'll totally go multiple times too.

I'm dressing up as Captain Sally from Varric Tethras' book series. I've always wanted to be a pirate.

I need to talk to my friends!

Oh, Frodo! We forgot something.

I feel there's something to be said for those who respect the privacy of others.

I'm so sorry, Fenris. The tabloids have it right.

I am in love with the dwarf.

I was wondering when I'd finally see more disaster in my dreams.

I knew it was right not to trust Anders. Only an idiot could've thought that plan would come off without any consequences.

Varric! Did you see my ears?

I wonder, if he'd not wanted to be on the front lines, if he'd just hung back as I'm sure everyone wished, if he'd have managed to escape. Someone would have insisted he run, I'm sure of it. What would have happened then?

It's strange, dreaming of a king one served in one's dreams.

Okay so we know all about the dangers of assuming a woman is pregnant when she isn't. In fact, it's best not to ask a woman if she's pregnant unless you can actually see a baby emerging from her at that very moment.

But no one ever warned me about the equal danger of knowing a woman is pregnant and pointing said fact out to the brother-in-law of the woman in question. Apparently, it's especially bad when the woman is your boss, and the brother-in-law turns out to be the father, and the husband hasn't got a clue.

So, I lost my job today.

Everything is wonderful and nothing hurts.

I love EVERYTHING!

Except Kirkwall.

We were trying to string together a set for my segment this morning and I shot a nail through my foot. We bandaged it up, taped the segment, and now I'm sitting in the emergency room.

This is actually not my first injury. I've broken a thumb, cut my thigh open, and fallen off a wall.

I swear Mr J's Neighborhood is cursed.

As horrible as what happened to the ranch really was, this does give us a chance to reassess and make it even better. While we do have most of the funds necessary, we're probably going to need a lot of manpower, and will welcome volunteers. I'll update everyone when we're at that stage. and have the secret underground facilities already built and covered


[Locked to Wrex]

I'm headed to Scott's in the morning to look over some of what he's working on. I thought we should name one of the new buildings after Roy, since he's lost the most of all of us.

Seriously. Cannot state this enough.

Fuck Kirkwall.

I've grown accustomed to nightmares. But no amount of pain medication can mask the strain they put on fractured ribs.

Happy 4th, everyone! What a beautiful display! I hope everyone else had a great day, too!

Okay, let's see here.

Aveline, Varric, Merrill and Fenris. I need to talk to all of you.

Garrett, Bethany, Carver, you lot are off the hook for now. Lot? God, I'm even talking like her now.

Yesterday a nice man rescued me from drowning, but I forgot to ask his name.

( It's the zombie apocalypse... )

Does anybody want a souvenir from Disneyland?

This doesn't look like the spa...

Doesn't this phone have some sort of map? I should learn how to use it.

So what's this Twitter thing I keep hearing about on the news?

I think I need a hobby of some sort. Preferably of the stress-reducing kind.

Otherwise, I think I may actually end up throwing one of my students out a window next year.

Gather around, kittens. I've got a short story for one and all.

Pretty hysterical woman thinks husband is cheating on her. He's a man of means her husband is, his name being a key to unlock many gates. The pretty woman was able to keep him all to herself for a year, a grand feat if there ever was one. But now he's set to a wandering and she's suspicious and would like to know who has stolen the majority of her husband's time.

Another woman?

Another man?

No and no. He's found a new mistress all right. Not one she would ever expect - shark diving.


( Wish you were here )

I have had it. Had it, you hear me? These dreams are stupid and annoying and incredibly hot did I cover stupid already?

Because it is. Goddammit.

So then, boys and girls. It's just about time for things to get exciting.

Leaving aside the charity ball, we still have several auctions starting up, with the goal of fundraising to get our local athletes to London for the Olympics next month. They're leaving soon, so they'll have time to train at their various venues in advance, and that means that we need to step up our game in order to get them there.

I have six jackets, each of them very individualistic and one-of-a-kind, in sizes XS, S, M, L, XL, and 2X, all of which are dedicated to the dream of health and athleticism at every size, with a subtly Olympian motif. If you have questions, feel free to ask them, but the actual auction for them will end on Saturday night at the charity ball. If you absolutely must have one, please send me a private message with your maximum bid. I'll let you know if the ball's maximum bid at the silent auction is higher, so you'll have a chance to outmatch it, unless an assortment of people are all desperate for the same size, in which case... well, we'll see.

And, because I know well the power of the Internet to awe and amaze, I'm going to turn to you, boys and girls: Olympian athletes are not a corporation, and therefore sponsoring them to get to the Olympics can, and perhaps should, be crowdsourced. Nothing at all says that you can't donate $5 to help your favorite local athlete get a chance to shine. If a thousand people all donate whatever they have lying around in their PayPal accounts, I'm completely certain at least four teams would have their total expenses covered instantaneously.

[ooc: artificial PayPal DONATE! button]

[Locked to Varric]

I thought, perhaps, I could make you dinner. A thank you, of sorts.

The Ugly Cup is closing!

That's the little coffee shop I tend to do my notes at after hours. There isn't even a Starbucks or anything nearby. Shame so many little businesses can't make ends meet right now.

I take it you're probably going to be away for the holiday, which is too bad. I'll be sure to drink extra just for you. Is everything okay, though?

And I thought living here was going to be boring. In the month or so since I've gotten settled in here it's mostly been things like shooing bored kids away from the woods with their spray paint cans, beer bottles, and lighters. I havn't even gotten to shoot a tranq dart at wildlife yet. I'm pretty annoyed about that.

Then this week happens and it's like every exciting thing that could have happened over the last month just got packed into a few days.

I met a guy named Gandalf who posts on 'this crazy net thing', so you can blame him for my presence here, by the way.

Anyway, can someone tell me where I can go to get extremely drunk in the presence of people so I don't have to drink alone?

[Locked to Varric]

I've thought about your offer. I'd like to accept.

So, any other random members of my family planning to spontaneously move to California? The San Andres fault is already unstable, you're just going to make things worse.

"Love isn't finding a perfect person. It's seeing an imperfect person perfectly." - Sam Keen

This has to be one of the better places you've dragged me, sister.

...The Hawke name is already infamous beyond all reason, isn't it?

Rose, you and your text flirting is just too adorable. Well, too adorable for me to not tease you about publicly.

I'm also proud to announce that Hangman is now once again doing the ever popular $2 Tequila Thursdays. Shooters for all!

So, I called the mole lady Nurse Hatchet, and she's surprisingly upset with me. Since my girlfriend's downstairs working (my girlfriend is awesome by the way, seriously, yours isn't as good, just accept it) I've got to come up with a way to pass the time, since now Hatchet is glaring at me and won't talk to me.

SO. Uncle Tony is going to help you fuckers out. Sounds great, right?

Treat this like an advice column. Ask me a question, and I'll try to help you through your life's problems and bullshit like that.

And I swear to God, if someone sends me strippers again I'm going to return the favor. With a male stripper.

A bear stripper. An old bear stripper. Unless you're into that kind of thing, which is okay, not judging, but then you get like, an old lady. I don't know, just don't send strippers seriously.

Hey Varric, remember me? I had my birthday at your bar and my band and I played a couple of songs. Well, it's our guitarist's birthday and he wanted me to ask if you'd be willing to do something like that for us again? It's in a week so we can actually advertise this time and hopefully bring more people in to the bar.

I've finished the first draft of my next novel. Its about a ship that crashes on a watery world and the struggles the only survivor goes through as she tries to find a way to get off the planet. Not going to reveal much more than that until it goes to publishing.

Right. Social Media. Soooooooocial media.

Am I doing it right? Whatever. I'm Tony Stark, and now that that's out of the way, let's all get to know each other.

Get to the Hard Rock in an hour. I'm buying all night.