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Great. I stopped a mugger tonight, but he had a knife and managed to snag my cape at one point so now there's a hole in it. In the dreams, we had extra costumes and Bruce had someone who fixed these things. I don't know where I'm supposed to get this fixed here.

Kate, do you have any idea? Anyone else?

I ran into my dad today. I haven't seen him in a couple of months and it was just as frosty as the last time. They blame me cause they had to get actual jobs again after I sued them to get access to my money last year. It makes me so mad that they see all of this as my fault.

Well, now the crazy Wizard of Oz-esque situation is over I'm really not sure what to think of this place. Is this a common occurence? I wasn't really affected at all, but reading up about it on here was kind of crazy.

But since I need to focus on other things I wanted to ask and see if anyone wanted to come to my first official fight this weekend, Friday to be specific, the main event will be broadcast on Spike. I can set aside a handful of tickets and I know a few people on here wanted to go, so please let me know if you're at all interested.

Thank you to all of you who came out to our opening night last night! It was hugely successful.

For those of you not in the know, Loki Odinson and I are both in a run of Midsummer Night's Dream, that will be going on for the next two weeks. It seems like such a short time, but all good things must come to an end, I suppose.

I hope to see all of you there!

Most people would be worried when they read this sort of thing. It just makes me want to get out there and catch more scumbags!

Okay so I go into the bathroom, and one of the cats is on the toilet. Doing his thing. And he looks at me, and I look at him, and then he flushed the fucking toilet and trots out like he's king of the world.

What the actual fuck?

Anyone want a house? Otherwise I'm gonna pay someone to blow it up I'm looking at you Lina Inverse demolish it. Don't have need of the space anymore.

Imagine telling someone who may very well loathe you you're their mother?

So I got into a mood today and took my batcyclemotorcycle out. Got into some street races. Ended up smoking some people, including this hot little femme.

Had a good time.

I never understood how it could be so difficult to pick our paint colors until now. There's so much to decorate and I don't even know where to start. Figured painting my room was a good start, but I have no idea what color. I got a bunch of samples from the hardware store today and it's making it even more difficult.

Superheroes - that is to say, female superheroes in particular - have very peculiar and impractical costumes, don't they?

I woke up this morning to a loud thumping noise and realised that it was the sound of my heart beating. Something it hasn't done in months, and now is finally doing again.

It is... interesting how used to being undead you become, when you finally transition through it all. I forgot about things like breathing, or temperature changes. I think I'll miss the things being a vampire awarded me. Superhuman strength, and speed. I'll have to adjust my fighting style all over again.

But it's worth it to be able to eat real food. Speaking of that, I'm starving. Cass, we should order in a bunch of pizzas tonight!

New dreams apparently means new gifts too.

So, leaving Gotham and giving up being Batgirl was apparently all part of a plan with Bruce from before he died. I kept in contact with Tim and went to Hong Kong. When Bruce returned, Tim visited me and asked me to return to the team and after some consideration, I did, but not as Batgirl. Instead, I became Blackbat.

And of course, when I woke up this morning, I found my Blackbat costume in the closet. I don't even know why I looked in the closet this morning, considering I haven't actually unpacked my clothes yet and there isn't anything else in the closet. But, I like this costume a lot better than the Batgirl one. I might have to take it out for a test run soon.

Trying to find a date as a vampire is totes harder than you'd think. I mean I could mez the person but that's skeevy as fuck, but when he or she sees my eyes it's like they've gone to nopetown. It sucks.

Well you get the occasional person who's way into it but most of the time that's kinda not a long-term thing.

And then there's the baby which is another nopetown kinda thing!

In other news, Barbara Gordon is amazing. And quite possibly the closest to perfection that humanity has has ever come.

Too bad she's only in my dreams. :( Cry forever.

This is the last thing that I need right now.

I'm so exhausted. I haven't even been this exhausted when I was training non stop for the Olympics. I've been out every night looking for some lead on Laura's disappearance and even even with all of the bat gadgets in my utility belt, I haven't found anything. It's times like these that I really wish Oracle was here. Could use her ability to hack into any cameras in the city right about now.

I've had more dreams, finally! It was very thrilling, I have to say. We were all preparing for Thor's coronation, getting dressed in our finest armour and what have you. Everyone was going swimmingly, the entire kingdom was there to celebrate with us.

Then, just as Odin was about to crown Thor king, there was a great disturbance! Frost giants had invaded the castle, and were in the room where all the great relics were kept.

Unfortunately I didn't get to help at all, it was take care of by the guards and a great robotic creature used to protect the room. But exciting none the less!

I got up early to go to a training session with Steve, only to find that I seem to be able to lift quite a bit more than I had in my previous session. Interesting.

Has anyone seen Laura Kinney? I'm her roommate and she went out earlier and was supposed to be back by now to do more packing, but I haven't heard from her and she hasn't answered any of my texts and her phone is going to voice mail. I'm worried and it's making me antsy and when I get antsy, I want to go punch someone.

I'm starting to think that most of my time as a sober companion is going to be solving murders.

I feel like Angela Landsbury. How awesome is that?

Also I have an online date. I mean I signed up for one of those online things and now I have a date. I have no idea how this is going to go. Wish me luck.

My dreams just keep getting weirder and weirder. There's angels and demons, leather and weapons. It's an artists dream really and I'm loving the work I'm creating from them but seriously messed up!

Laura and I are looking into getting a new place and passing our current place on to Jubilee's cousin since this place is completely paid for and it only makes sense. Thing is, neither me or Laura have ever done the house/condo/apartment buying thing before. Anyone have any tips or advice?

A few weeks before the fight and all I want to do is lounge around. This time I'm not so worried. Ah well.

So, I saw that post the other day about stunt work and it got me thinking, maybe I might contact him about an interview or audition or whatever it is that stunt people do. I mean, not only do I have the gymnastics background, but the martial arts from the dreams. What better way to use both of those?

This could either be a good idea or just a crazy, late night idea.

I do not recommend a two story fall.

Holy secret identities, Batman.

Oh my fucking god.

Feel better than I have in awhile. Still not 100% but at least I'm trying.

It's been months since my last dream and all of a sudden I had a bunch of new ones.

Alfred helped me get into ESL classes so I could learn to read and write. Deathstroke found me one night and after injecting me with something, persuaded me to join him. I was a member of the League of Assassins after that then joined his Titan's East. I almost killed Supergirl then broke my father out of jail. I fought Tim and my father while I was under Slade's serum and eventually Tim injected me with an antiserum. Batman felt responsible for what had happened to me and allowed me back into the Batfamily, but Dick wasn't quite as accepting as Batman was. I wanted revenge against my father and Slade and started looking for them secretly. After a confrontation where I almost killed my father, Batman offered to officially adopt me.

It's strange to think that I'm capable of murder. I mean, I obviously have different views on things in real life than in the dreams, but if it came down to it, I could kill someone if I needed to. Does that make me a bad person?

( Cut for image, open to all )

[Image of Wade sitting on an Oliphaunt at a car wash]

BERTHA IS BACK! YES!! SHE'S MY BAAABY.

Really weird dreams And wtf with the costume, and then it's Volcano Doomsday. Can we get a do-over?

Gwen

You okay over there?

Pansy

Stay safe.

Aveline

Might want to call in tonight.

Dun dun da da dun, da da daaaa dun da dun dun duuuuun da duuuun!

Dun da dun daaau dun dun duuun!

do de doo dun dun daa ddaaa!

Hypothetically speaking....Lets say you're going down on your girlfriend and her hypothetical claws pop and she doesn't have her healing factor yet so you panic. Hypothetically. And your a vampire so you turn her so she doesn't like..bleed to death. Hypothetically.

Lets say you need a place to stash a body for a few days.

Hypothetically speaking where would you do that?

And also, hypothetically speaking, is there anyone that wants to hypothetically donate blood, because the hypothetical girlfriend is hypothetically going to be hypothetically really hungry.

Ugh, every idea I come up with of something to do tonight quickly turns into the worst idea ever in my mind. Go to the bars and drink until I drop? Nah, don't do that - it'll be full of gross guys who will hit on you. Go to the gun range? Nah, don't do that - it'll be full of gross guys who will hit on you. Go down to the beach and do some late night surfing/swimming? Nah, don't do that - it'll be fun of gross guys who will hit on you.

It sucks when the guy you like is all zombie-fied So, I'm debating between some wine and netflix or just sucking it up and hitting up some of the Greek parties nearby.

Since my roommates are going out tonight, it looks like it's gonna be just me, a pint of ice cream and Netflix tonight. Not as exciting as last Valentine's Day. Oh and just so no one thinks I've become a complete shit in, I have started going back to the gym. I told my coach I'd had mono back in January, since I couldn't tell him the real reason I wasn't coming to the gym.

So until someone confirms for me that a pregnancy from your dreams won't happen in real life I'm just gonna keep taking a test every four or five hours and ban anything that produces sperm from coming within a hundred feet of me.

I might be paranoid. I'm probably overreacting. But sixteen and pregnant is terrifying, as is being twenty and pregnant. Okay maybe just being pregnant when you're not ready is terrifying.

Robin isn't the father. Don't ask.

Oh yeah, and DAMIAN WAYNE THIS IS EXACTLY THE SORT OF THING I WANTED TO BE WARNED ABOUT!

The first thing you learn is how to be alone. You have to learn it quickly, because you are your only company most of the time. You embrace that lesson easily, so well that you convince yourself you wanted it that way. Disappear into your own head with your own thoughts, until you are alone, even in a crowd. And you don't mind. You don't know how to stop feeling alone anymore. The struggle only comes when you want to embrace the crowd of friends around you.

The second thing you learn is how to wait. When your mind is active but your body has nowhere to go, this is very difficult. You count things. The tiles on the walls around you, above and below you. The footsteps you hear walking past your door in either direction. The number of unique heartbeats you can pick up. You catalogue the smells your enhanced nose can find, even though you already know them all. Go through, again, every piece of knowledge anyone's ever given you. Your mind is the thing that's captive in this place, but you know of nowhere else to let it wander to. When you realise that there may come a time when you will see something new, something that will set your mind free, you know that you have something to wait for. Then you understand. You can only make yourself wait when there's something worth waiting for.

The third thing you learn is how to kill. I don't think I want to know what the fourth lesson is.

So there was an earthquake in Gotham. My boyfriend Dean, who I also dated here weirdly enough, was all like 'peace out' when I said I was going to stick around and help people because he was worried about scratching his dad's car or some other nonsense. Which totally didn't surprise me since he was a massive jack off here too. Anyway, Spoiler springs into action and ends up running into Huntress. Oh my god, the Huntress. She's amazing, should never be allowed near weapons because oh my god does she love to kill people, but amazing.

She wanted to kill my dad though, not so amazing. I know I never really wanted my dad dead, I mean, he may be the biggest jerk in Gotham (Batman has nothing on my dad because Batman obviously has feelings) but he's still my dad. I ended up having to save him from her, but... I don't know if I feel good about it or not. Is there something wrong with me?

I don't think it'll ever not be a little strange when I get sent links on my twitter of gif sets of me at the Olympics and stuff saying Happy Birthday. I mean, I know I have fans and everything who know it's my birthday, but the fact that they spend so much time making these things is just crazy. I think it's because I've just started seeing myself as a regular person and nothing special, that it surprises me when people do that stuff.

Also, I realized that next month will be a year since I took my parents to court.

Batman is such a jerk. First he compliments me on the fact that I was able to sneak up on him, then he starts using my real name and gets at grit teethed and is all 'I told you to shelve your costume and forget all this. SHELVE IT. FORGET IT. TONIGHT.' and swung away. But damn it, Robin and I work really well together and we're doing good work. I pull my own weight, I've even impressed Batman a few times, but no, I have to quit. Maybe he's just possessive over Robin but whatever, I am not going to let him stop me.

Okay, so I guess I'm just gonna handle this here and hope everyone sees this so I won't have to go over any of this again. Yes, I was at the AVNs, yes that was really me and my boyfriend in that interview, yes I know who my boyfriend is. Yeah, I've seen that article about the high school kid that was suspended for doing porn and then had his suspension lifted and all the support he generated, the boyfriend has seen it too. And I've decided to stop answering the 'what's it like with a porn star?' question mainly because I'm running out of insane things to say and it's starting to get really boring.

It's not been all terrible though, yesterday while I was working some guy who wasn't in my section yells to me 'Hey Yoko! You will never love Brandon the way Zevran does! Brevran forever!' Once I got over my shock I had to step into the back and laugh for a good solid five minutes before I got back to work.

Oh random porn lovers of the OC, please never change.

I think I may have a nervous breakdown. Seriously.

Why is there a pregnant lady in my house?

I think I'm ready to up my cosplay game to the next level. I mean, you can only be a guy in a dress so many times before it becomes expected. Unfortunately, my manufacturing skill set is strictly 19th century. I can sew and knit. I'm okay with makeup if it's not more complicated than eyeliner and nail polish. And I'm a fairly decent wig stylist. And honestly, for most cosplay, that's all you need. But I've always wanted to put together something awesome. A mecha. Or actual armor. Or a superhero. Maybe a racebent-genderbent superhero.

So. Open call. There are millions of people in the world. One of you reading this has to know somebody who cosplays or who wants to cosplay or who you can persuade to make costumes. Serendipity. Fate. Destiny. I'm waiting for you.

There is nothing quite like having a new guy in school flirt with you. Nothing like him pestering you until you kiss him.

And then to find out that he's not real at all and just as imaginary as all the other hallucinations you've been having. One minute a hot guy and the next minute all charred up and burned alive.

I just wish I knew why already. This is completely ridiculous.

Ugh! Another dream about stopping dad, and he was even already in prison this time. Oh, and he had me kidnapped. I spent two weeks handcuffed to a bed and being guarded by the Gully Carson gang in hopes that he could use it to manipulate Gully and then Batman. I swear, I can still feel the cuff cutting into my wrist. Anyway, Robin drops in and we escape together, after a kiss and some pretty blunt flirting of course. I think that version of me might be turned on a little by danger, or it could just be she's hot for Robin. Either way, ugh.

Anyway, later we meet up with Batman and he's, you know, all Batman at me. 'This is not appropriate' and 'This is not some kind of club, Ms Spoiler', blah blah blah. And you know what? That me is an awesome badass because not only do I school him on what he should have figured out already (world's greatest detective, my ass) but I also get a cool exit. I said: 'Excuse me if I don't jump when you bark, Batman' and then I swing away.

I later follow that up with nailing Gully in the back of the head with a diamond the size of my fist. Oh yeah, and Ducky (I like Ducky better than duck-boy for him, it matches all his pouting and apparent brooding better) took a pair of bullets for me. His suit has kevlar so it wasn't a big thing. After that I go to visit Dad in prison and the guard lets me kick the shit out of him for the full ten minutes. It felt soooo good!

So yeah, hopefully this will be the last time I have to deal with him in my dreams and the first of many times I kick ass and sass Batman.

So, uh... Yeah, that happened.

So I had a dream that my dad, shithead asshole murdering bastard going under the name of 'Cluemaster' like he's some super villian, is back in town (which is Gotham City, wherever that is, looks like Jersey to me) to kill people and to pull off some heists. Apparently in Gotham the cops are shit (again, just like Jersey) even though they've got this guy called Batman basically running around and doing all their work for them, so I decide to give them a hand. I put on this costume and decide to start collecting info on what 'daddy dearest' is doing and send clues to the cops (I call myself Spoiler, it is actually a kind of awesome name, even Batman thought so). Speaking of Batman though, I run into him and his sidekick (I totally hit Robin in the face with a brick when he pulled my hood off, go Steph!) and after they figure out who I am we team up to stop dad.

So after a bunch of fighting and heroics from Batman, Robin and yours truly, dad grabs me and is about to give me a face full of acid and he only stops when Bats tells him I'm his daughter and he has to pull off my hood to see. I take advantage of this and am about to kill him when Bats stops me. Then the cops swarm in and take dad and his crew away.

Odd enough, sure, but when I got up I had my Spoiler costume and a bunch of gear sitting next to me. I'm really not sure what to think about this.

How could I have been so stupid?

( Sometimes I really don't mind getting back to work! )

Okay so there are names written on the back of this picture I got and I was wondering if anyone in it might be around, maybe we can talk and figure this out. So if you are on this list or know someone who is let me know? I would really appreciate it.

Tim Drake
Cassandra Cain
Bruce Wayne
Damian Wayne
Barbara Gordon
Kara Zor-El
Dick Grayson
Wendy Harris

Um, hello? Not quite sure what to say here, but this man I met yesterday, Chuck, told me that I should look up this network. I guess I should introduce myself and see what happens?

My name is Sarah and I'm the manager over at Orange, Orange frozen yogurt shop in Irvine. I don't hope to keep that job forever, but it's a decent job for the moment. I've recently moved here from New York to spend more time with my mother and a change of scenery. I love gymnastics and martial arts, so if you ever want a trainer in either of those I have some experience in training people and I make a great sparring partner.

And that's about it. I'm just enjoying my declared snow day because only strange people want frozen yogurt when there was a blizzard last night. And I don't want to deal with them.