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Putain de merde et crise cardiaque. We don't have no fuckin' earthquakes in Louisiana.

A little bird got into the lab today.

Who is Charles Xavier?

Congratulations, scientists have taught monkeys to move robotic arms with their minds. They're so far behind me it's laughable. Hah hah!

It won't be long before you're all fat.

I'm starting to look like I have mange or something. Maybe it's time to just shave my head. I think I recall a certain Commander telling me she'd join me as a show of solidarity. Anyone else want to go bald with me?

To anyone that cares, the pointy teeth are back.

Shepard will be taking over as owner and primary person in charge. Dani Moonstar will be placed in charge of the horses, cattle and other animals, and all that other naturey...stuff.

Scott Summers' role will be unchanged, and there'll be no one let go.

PM me for any questions.

This old Kroger just needs to retire.

Heh! I assume there are a few out there who would be glad to hear I'd been robbed of my ability to speak. So sorry to disappoint. In quasi-solidarity, I am taking the day off to read. I have several books out of the library and I think I like a day to, well, read them.

Update, shortly thereafter...

Faiza, Anakin dropped off a bag of these. I'll try my best not to eat them all.

Ever do something and then realize something wonderful afterwards, that you hadn't realized you were going to realize?

So, what kind of things are the kids doing these days to keep themselves busy on long car trips and stuff? Lorna, don't say Crocheting, we both know I sucked at that the last time I tried.

I'm going to be stuck in a bed for a few weeks, and I just know I'm going to go insane if I don't keep my hands busy. I was thinking of buying a gameboy or one of those portable playstation things. I'm not much of a gamer outside of angry birds and candy crush, but I'm willing to try anything at this point.

Also, book recommendations?

What do you do when you're not sure if news is good or bad but you really need to tell someone and they might freak out?

I wish I had my bloody license! Can anyone teach me how to fuckin drive? Think you need one to buy a car.

It's okay. Kind of expected that.

I didn't think it was possible to feel this sick and still be alive.

In other news, my therapist picked a hell of a time to skip town. Time to hunt another one down, I guess. I've never really been the therapy type, but I'd have to be an idiot to turn away that kind of help in my current state.

OOC Note: Possible Triggers for Medical Stuff in the comments

Lets play a game.

Biggest regret from your youth.

ETA: Silly regrets! Though serious ones are welcome too!

I forgot how annoying living with cats can be. They keep moving things. I'm going to start taping the things on the mantel down so they don't get knocked off. Bloody beasts will learn to respect my knick knacks!

My dreams took a turn for the horrible. I’m trying to look at this objectively, but my side feels like it’s on fire. There’s this angry wound I woke up with…

I just don’t know how the hell I kept going after that. Getting run through and then crawling through mud and water and rain to escape.

I’m not even going to think about that shrine, or the corpses. Oh god, Steph.

I could really use a jaffa cake.

And rescue from hospital.

House is way too empty now. Going to be glad to get rid of it. Should have months ago, really.

For those who do not know, and those who are curious, I will be wedding the love of my life, one Natasha Romanoff, this Saturday, September the 21st, in a public-ish ceremony at [venue, at time]. Be polite, be respectful, and be welcome on this day of celebration.

The weather will be, I guarantee, quite delightful.




(ooc: Since I am fail as a mun, if your muse knows Thor, they likely got an invitation already, hand written and engraved.)

Well, the cats are back to normal. I'm sure Lara's friend Sam will be sad not to see them flying around on the webcam anymore. I'm kind of sad, too. Watching them terrorize Renji was amusing as hell. Sorry, Renji, but it's true.

Wrex is probably super happy that Doom the squirrel is no longer trying to bench press the Ranch, too.

Unrelated - Does anyone on here knit? I've got a really weird request for a knitter. I'd pay for the yarn and your time, but I'm looking for handsocks. Or something like that. A long piece of knitted tube I can slide over my wrist and arm, and part of my hand?

My skin is really sensitive so it has to be the kind of yarn that was produced by angel feathers or something, but I'm willing to pay really decently for anyone who can do this for me.

So, that was fun. I'm going to do the human equivalent of lick myself and pretend that was intentional, then go home and sleep in my own bed. I'm not even going to Lysol it first.

I just wanted to say thanks to everyone who attended our wedding and the still ongoing reception. Kitty picked out a beautiful place.

So I've been digging around after seeing an interesting vase when I was at the museum the other day. It's Grecian, and depicts a woman with hard edges, and a male figure with light coming from a single eye. Like the mythical cyclops.

When I saw it, it triggered something because I'd remembered seeing it before. It was in one of my father's old books. It's believed to date to the early 5th century B.C.E, but little else is known about it, except where it was found nearly a hundred years ago.

Your archaeological science for the day!

Hospital food sucks and Shepard's one of the worst patients I've ever seen. Thank God for Angry Birds, I guess, or I'd be going completely insane.

I don't even want to think about the mileage I've put on my car traveling back and forth between the ranch and the hospital.

Have you had to deal with three flying cats and a squirrel with laser beams that can bench press a horse? Believe me, you don't want to. This week can be over any time now.

Show of hands - who missed me?

Come. Get your. Squirrel.

He has laser beam eyes and he's flying.

What the hell. Is going on.


Edit: HOW THE FUCK DO YOU LOCK THIS THING

Hey guys? Will everyone please stop thinking so loud?

The best mornings are where you wake up and it takes you a moment to remember where you are. Also, Lara, I'm really, really sorry.

Anyone ever really want to punch someone through a wall? But you can't because it's not really their fault you want to punch them. Or at least they haven't remembered yet.

Asking for a friend.

More dreams...

Leave it to my best mate to sun herself on a research ship.God, that swimsuit Also leave it to Sam to talk her father into funding the expedition. I'm not going to give into the temptation here, either with her money or my own. I'll earn my keep

I've read about the place we're trying to find, too. I mean, in the waking world. It's hard not to when you're biggest interests lay in Asia.

It's like it's starting all over again. I can't even say if it's better or worse, just the dreams are different. They just...

I don't like who I am in those. I believed her too easily...

I've been having the same dreams for so long I forgot what new ones feel like. It's funny, but I totally forgot Sinister was even a big deal in the dreams. Don't even ask me how that happened. I guess I just didn't dream enough about him.

I don't know why he'd want to attack me, but the dream ended on a cliffhanger. Like it's the season finale of my crappy dreams and they want me to tune in.

Attention sexually active members of the Valarnet:

Rugburn is nobody's friend. It is only sexy for the first little while, and the injuries that result can stick around for some time. If you must have sex on the floor, put down a blanket or a sheet first. This will prevent most friction burns.

Your attention, please.

I have just closed on the space for my new burlesque club in Huntington Beach. It will be Japanese themed - I myself am Japanese and wish for it to resemble the hostess clubs back home.

I am looking for liberated women who might be interested in working there. I am also looking for two deejays with experience, and a number of security men to ensure that my ladies are not harassed in any way - the latter is especially important. If a security person fails in a significant way, they will not remain employed for long.

Please reply here, or send a private message to me, Oyama Yuriko, if you are interested. I will pay well.

I'm so glad things are back to normal. I'm excited to start my first week as a full time teacher at the Ranch! I didn't expect my life to go in this direction when I graduated, and it's been a crazy year, but I'm actually pretty happy with how things are. There's only one major downside, but there's nothing I could have done to avoid that.

I still wake up and wonder how I got so lucky. I have a great husband, a crazy eclectic family, and a really fulfilling job.

It seems to be the week to get pets. Meet Tsavo. She's an Ashera, which is actually a fairly new breed. I have to admit, the scientist in me wants to observe her to see how much of her wild cat lineage remains. She's fun to take on walks - that photo is of a little girl who asked for me to take a photo of her with the cat. So far, I'm very pleased.

Thanks to everyone who came yesterday. I told you it would kick ass.

Now, where's the fucking opt out button for these dreams. Dream me is a dick. No more. And then to top it all off, I woke up with a special surprise. First I killed Lexi, then turned Isobel who is Elena's mom, shit's not cool, I blamed my brother, killed Jeremy, I can't even keep all this shit straight. And I have fucking fangs. Fangs and feelings. I'm not even going to go into what happened with Katherine. FUCKFUCKFUCK. Then there is Elena who I do -

Now me and my best friend Jack Daniels are celebrating.

Hello Valarnet. I'm Lara and I'm new to town. It's my understanding this is a great network for making contacts, and that's something I need to do.

I'm actually looking for a room mate. My best friend is still in London, and my family had a house out here that's too big and lonely for one person. It has access to a private beach and a public dock.

The Hotness wishes she was vampy again.

Chopped the braids off today, went back to shorter hair. It felt like a good time to do it.

My head feels so light, now. It's pretty amazing how heavy your hair can get.

The hardest thing about having a new roommate is getting used to wearing clothes all the time. And not having sex anywhere but our bedroom. Surprisingly, the roommate himself has been no trouble, he mostly minds his own business. I think he's trying to be as unobtrusive as possible so we don't kick him out. I guess we'll see how that goes once he settles in and figures out we're not jerks.

It appears that I am your reigning oil wrestling champion, Valarnet.

I accept offerings in the form of good coffee, fruit loops, and milkshakes.

Just nothing with coconuts. I'm already sick of the smell and I'm going to smell like a tropical island for at least another month.

I am terrible with these matters, but I am told it is the proper fashion for one to introduce herself to the neighborhood before the new neighbors come knocking. My name is Dr. Halja Död, but I please feel free to call me Helena. I have recently returned to the United States from abroad and have begun to move into the large Gothic Queen Anne in Lake Forest. I do apologize for any noise this process or my dog may cause you. The movers are late in arriving. I do expect this pandemonium to end within a day or two and to have settled in by that time.

As I am new to the neighborhood and the pantry is bare, could anyone recommend a few good restaurants? Additionally, I am also looking for a trustworthy housemate (this house is far too large for me), a good gym and sports clubs, dog parks, and few charities in need to volunteer my medical services in the area. I appreciate your patience and hospitality.

What marvellous things people come up with nowadays. A couple in Venice Beach wants to open an entirely milk-and-cereal restaurant, with a few extra options. They're running a kickstarter, and I chipped in some money. I think it's inventive.

I predict a flood of stoners there at all hours.

I'm looking forward to being a father again. For real with getting to raise them in a normal god damn life

This is just a reminder to anyone who's interested in coming by my bar. We'll be reopening on Friday, with a catered party starting at 3pm and lasting until all the food's gone. There will be typical game watching food: wings, pizzas, nachos, and milkshakes (though we won't be featuring those on weekdays anymore, sorry folks).

We'll also have a really good happy hour special, and as always emergency service personnel get a discount.

I'm dragging a new friend on a bar crawl at five. We're starting at Joeyrays.

We might as well make this a thing.

I'm having that impending doom feeling again. I hate the impending doom feeling. Especially with the twins coming back.

Well, it seems I've planned my vacation, no, retreat for the perfect week. I do hope things are peaceful again, soon. On all fronts.

[Locked to Faiza]
I'll be in touch. I'm heading north, hoping for some wide-open spaces, to give my mind the room it needs to de-clutter. My heart stays wherever you are.

I'm already over looking for a house. I've been doing it for two days, and it's already pissing me off a lot. I guess the market has changed a lot since I bought my place.

I wonder if I could get a permit to add another story instead? It'll be a hell of a lot easier in the long run, I think. Get a decorator for the part we currently have, so it's more 'us' and less 'me'. Luckily we have similar taste in colors, so that won't be too bad.

Is it weird that I really look forward to having a custom master bathroom? Like, the second story idea appeals to me specifically because it means I can make an enormous bathroom with awesome shit like a fancy tub and two sinks and maybe some kind of self-sanitizing option? I don't know if that last one is a real thing.

Also, I know there's some clothing designers or other people who do stuff like that on here, is anyone willing and able to make custom stuff for a wedding? It's a steam punk themed thing, so no big poofy dresses or stuffy suits.