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Look, guys. I'm super trendy and posting filtered pictures about my dinner.

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Along with the creepy ancient tomb thingy of demonology and vampire slaying, I woke up with a wooden stake underneath my pillow and I think it's name is Mr. Pointy. I'm not sure why I think it even has a name, except that my brain knows that it has a name. Who names a stake? You name teddy bears and cute pets. You don't give names to wooden weapons. You just don't.

I think I have a split personality going on and she's convinced she's a vampire slayer. Unless someone is strategically breaking into my apartment and leaving Halloween props around like it's an Easter Egg hunt.

What did I learn last night? Taking care of three drunk men is pretty much like babysitting toddlers. Which is a challenge when you're not really that sober.

I'm not one to post pictures of my McDonalds meals. This is something that I made and actually think I outdid myself this morning.

( butterscotch sticky buns )

Superheroes - that is to say, female superheroes in particular - have very peculiar and impractical costumes, don't they?

Well, it’s not Rent.com. I figured it was better than finding a roommate off of craigslist. Is anyone looking for a roommate? I’m house trained, I promise.

So...uh...I woke up with the ring I've seen on my dream on my finger...Damon..Stefan...you're not playing a prank on me, are you? I mean we did get pretty drunk last night...

I've recently moved to the area and stumbled upon this place, and it seemed a good idea to join up. My name is Lance du Lac, just moved from London. They say America is the land of opportunity and so I'm here to test my own fortunes. I run my own private security firm. This is really the ideal place for it, I think, with so many parties and rising stars and the like. I'm rather looking forward to my time here.

I've been stuck inside an airplane for the last however many hours. I mean I don't even know how many hours it was, I didn't count, but it felt like I'd aged at least a year before it landed.

And now I'm stuck in a car with three kids and a screaming baby. I. Am. Going. Insane. HOW DO PEOPLE SURVIVE TRAVELING LIKE THIS ALL THE TIME? You can't just squish yourself inside a tin can, I mean... I'm not even the size of a polar bear and I had a hard time. And this lady next to me smelled like a nursing home the entire flight and she kept battling me over the armrest.

Why don't planes have more armrest space? Ugh. Whatever. I'm here in California and it is WAY more busy than I thought it was. Did you see the hours of operation on some of these places? Even the buddhist temple over here is open till like... 10. 10pm. Wow. If you're lucky, where I'm from, you find somewhere open past 8.

... I might have had too much coffee. HI!

So what's everyone's favorite car?

Oh god. Oh my god. She's not in them. She's not there. I've dreamed all the way up to being sixteen and she's not in any of them.

I can't believe I have to take summer classes. This is so lame! Not only that, but I have to have a tutor too. I mean, I didn't do that bad this last semester. I mean, come on, it's the summer! This is not the time I should be in school. This can't be legal.

Where do I sign up to get off these dreams? Pretty sure I just had one that hit way too close to home. I want off this ride now. I left New York to get away from memories of my parents.