Network

It's nice when things stay familiar between dreams and reality. I guess it would have been nicer to have one version of my mother who wasn't the kind to burn bridges... and in this case an actual tapestry.. and disown people who make her mad. Probably would have been nice if one version of my father also didn't enable her like he does. But I guess then I wouldn't be able to recognize anyone, would I?

As much as we have loved the time alone together in the Bahamas, we have missed the girls and our pets so much. We haven't been on the network much while we were on our Honeymoon, since we promised each other we wouldn't. So curious what we're going to be coming back to California to? It's been a while since the OC has decided to ...be the OC and I just want to make sure everything is still standing.

So I guess yesterday was like National Dog Day and I was going to share a picture of Dragon, but I never ended up finding the time. So, it's a day late, but this is Dragon and I'm so grateful to my ex for letting me keep him when we broke up.

( Dragon )

I also signed up for EMT training that starts in October. I'm looking forward to finally having a plan for my life.

I went to pick up my allergy meds from the drugstore today, and while I was waiting in line? All the songs on the muzak were songs that I loved when I was in high school. And then it hit me. I turn 27 next month. These songs are all ten years old now, or more.

Oh my god, I'm old. When did that happen?

I'm trying to get revisions done, so I can have this all finished and sent back to my editor before the wedding and I won't have to worry about it. But it looks like one of our four footed children has other plans. As I'm sitting there on the computer, Apollo comes up meowing at me. I think he's wanting to play or attention, but he keeps ignoring my attempts to throw his mice or pet him. Finally I get up, thinking maybe it's his water or his litter box. I don't speak cat, all I can do is just ...process of elimination.

As soon as I got up, he jumped into my computer chair and curled up to go to sleep. He has other beds. He has Aslan, who is used to being used as a bed.

....I think I'm going to go check on how everyone else is doing. Maybe my chair will be free when I get back.

I really was expecting to be more nervous this close to the wedding but I just keep feeling even more certain that this time is right. The only bit I am nervous about is being away from our girls for so long. I haven’t spent more than a couple nights in a row away from them since getting custody back. I’m probably going to drive Regulus insane with wanting to check on them at my parents. And if by some miracle I don’t end up driving him nuts doing it I will end up driving mum and dad nuts with it.

[Filtered to Magic Guild]
I’ve been told that I’m not allowed to pop back while we’re away. No matter how messy things get here. If we end up facing another mini-apocalypse though...hopefully one of you can get around to making sure our house is still standing. I’m going to redo my wards before I leave so people breaking in isn’t a concern.

Oh fuck no! This might be the most fucking terrifying thing I have ever seen. Why would anyone want to do this?

It's really my fault the microwave blew up, even if I don't know how he blew it up. There's a reason Amycus doesn't cook, he's an absolute disaster in the kitchen.

Everyone's okay, the house is fine. The microwave is very dead, though, and from what I read on the internet, it's going to stay that way. Apparently trying to fix it if you haven't gone to school for it is a sure fire way for something worse to happen.

So anyone have any suggestions on what brand to get? Before, I just got whatever was cheapest.

I keep having the same recurring dreams. Not DREAM dreams, just regular neurotic dreams. I have no idea how the actual "speak now or forever hold your peace" thing goes if someone actually objects to a wedding in real life, but that's the part I keep dreaming about. It's always someone who wasn't invited to the wedding. Sometimes it's my parents, sometimes it's Am's deadbeat ex, and a couple of times it's been the girl I had a play wedding with in kindergarten when 1. I had no idea I was gay yet and 2. I was five, and there's no way that was legally binding.

All of them are uninvited and, so, really, they have no say.

I guess, really, I'm just nervous they're going to show up anyway, and try to make a scene. My parents or his ex, I mean. I just need reassurance there really isn't anything they can do if they try.

I like this bar. I keep being bought fruity drinks. Nobodies judging my fruity drink choices. Never been to a Pride event, and yet here we are. I like it.

No contact means no contact. It doesn’t mean no contact except for when you want money. Or when you hear I got taken to the hospital. It means no contact at all. And if you think I didn’t call and report it the second I saw my parent’s number on my call log, then you don’t know me at all. I really hope she has to spend at least one night in jail for it. Knowing her loss of her own comfort is the only thing that will get it through to her I’m not their personal cash machine anymore. And that I don’t want them in my life.

I finally made my way to the grocery store this morning and I saw something I really wish I hadn't seen. Who brings their pet to the store and then leaves it locked in the car with no windows open?! No living creature deserves that.

I swear it’s like dealing with small children at my office with my assistant out. The temporary one from the Agency we use is utterly worthless. Or just incompetent. I’m not sure which. She doesn’t have even the most basic understanding of what the hell a closed door means. It means no one comes in because I’m busy. I don’t care that there was no one else in my office. It’s called a phone conference. I tend to have several of them a day because sometimes things happen that the client needs dealt with immediately not later when they’ve been able to drive to the office.

I wonder if there isn’t some way I can tell the Agency not to send her again. I’d rather do it myself than deal with her again.

Our new promotion down at the shop comes with one free riding lesson, so anyone that ever wanted to learn to ride a motorcycle come on down.

I usually never answer my cell phone if it's from a number not in my address book. There are people I'd rather not talk to, and plus with all the phone scams these days? I figure it's much safer to just let it go to voicemail. If it was something important, they will leave a message. And if it was about my writing, I live with my PR agent and it would go to his phone, anyway. So I don't have a reason to answer unknown numbers at all, really.

So I don't know why I answered one today. I guess I was just busy getting the groceries out of the car and just wasn't thinking? Apparently my number is a digit off from some salon or something, and the lady on the other end could not grasp that, no, we can't fit you in for a cut and color, I don't know a Tina and if she has an open slot, this is a cell phone and the only thing I can do with hair is a really crooked french braid. When I finally hung up, she called right back and demanded my manager.

Part of me wanted to go ahead and tell her she had whatever appointment she thought she was booking and let her make a fool out of herself when she got there. But the girls were right there, and I don't want to tell them that they can't lie and turn around and lie in front of them, you know?

If she calls again, I'm just giving the phone to Aslan to bark at. She did want my manager, after all.

I just came home from work to discover that this seemingly innocent ball of orange fluff I picked up from a box Friday Night has decided to chew right through my very last pair of Manolo Blahniks. Have you ever wanted to just scream and threaten violence upon something only to look at their faces and realise there's absolutely no way that you can?

Stupid feline. I knew adopting this kitten was a bad idea. Yang, he's your son from now on.

I think I might finally be reaching the end of my Dreams. Or at least I seriously hope that I am. That child that Voldemort couldn't kill? He and his friends are back at the Castle fighting him and his followers. Which technically I'm one of but I was tied up by a group of them in one of the towers so I had to sit it out. My Dreamself seemed pretty disappointed about that because of course he wanted to be there fighting with his Lord. Me? I'm glad that he wasn't able to be down there. Enough blood on his hands already.

Sometimes this place is too crazy even for me, and I'm all 'holy crap what did I get myself into, why did I tell Orange County that I accepted its challenge?!'. And then we've got days like today, where I'm on my way home from work when this girl runs up the street at me.

Naga! Wow, but the cars on the road had like, no idea how to handle that. I wanted to shout something like 'Haven't you ever seen a polar bear dog before!?' but, like - they definitely haven't. So I can't even be mad about all the honking and screaming they were doing.

But hey, Asami? I am definitely going to have to consider moving into a bigger place, now. ALSO does anyone know where I can get bulk fish from?

My biggest issue with Mother's Day, and Father's Day while I'm thinking about it, is that people want to use it to pretend that even the most hellish parents are some type of saint and they get offended when you don't want to play along with their delusion about your parents. You had amazing parents? Great. Lucky you. I'm happy for you honestly. And maybe a little jealous My parents? My mother threw me out of the house the day I turned 18 because my father told her she either threw me out or he'd throw both of us out and fire her from his company after freezing all of her assets. So don't expect me to get all warm and loving about them just because society has decided to give them some damn holidays.

It's funny how different the last month of school is working at the elementary school library vs the college library. Nobody swearing up and down they returned something back in October and we should just cut them a break. No hectic last minute students trying to hoard entire shelves of books to themselves in the back corner while they work on a project they forgot about until just that moment. It's quiet and peaceful in comparison, even though I do have teachers swearing up and down they returned equipment that was never signed back in since March. So I guess that's the trade off there.

[Screened Away From Minors]

I never realized how many quotes, songs, and things are taken completely out of context for weddings until I started looking up things for my own wedding. Today I saw a wine glass with an Oscar Wilde quote. "Love is a sacrament that should be taken kneeling".

I get that they probably were talking about getting on one knee and proposing.

But I'm 110% positive that was not what Oscar was referring to.

Well the next couple of months around my office are going to be an adventure - my assistant called me today to ask about some time off to deal with a family matter. She'd already gotten in touch with the Agency about a temporary assistant for me and arranged for them to come by the office Monday morning to meet with me and discuss their duties and such before leaving. Assuming I feel that the person they send is a good fit. If not she'll call for someone else. I just hope that she can come back sooner than later because I need her efficiency to keep it running smoothly

And we come to that time of year again where Employees are asking to take the day off for a Marvel movie instead of, you know, doing their job. The number of last-minute "oh, by the way, can I have this day off" requests is insane.

So last year for Easter I had to blow up my bar, it was that filled with live peeps. They'd just overrun the entire place, it was actually kind of terrifying.

This year? We get a dragon. I'm not really sure which one I'd have preferred at this point. At least the dragon didn't ruin my bar, but I guess it ruined half of everywhere else, so.

The best way to get people to leave me alone on campus is to listen to something on my phone. I could listen to spotify, but there’s something much more satisfying about the look on people’s faces when I tell them that I’m binging a true crime podcast because I want to learn about the different things people have done to hurt each other. To see what the common denominators would be. If there even are any. Today I was sitting in the cafeteria, eating lunch and doing one of my readings with my headphones on and the episode I was listening to started talking about how this guy got sentenced for beating another man to death while drunk and somehow was making and drinking vodka in his prison cell, but none of the prison officials figured out that he was until it was time for him to be eligible for parole. And I just have to ask - how does a prison not realize that one of their prisoners is drinking? Like what is going on that you don’t realize that the guy has vodka breath all the time?

Last weekend I flew over to London with my brother, Whitley, so that I could place him in the care of my Great Aunt Rosemary. She's another renegade of the family, one that my father only accepted because of her money and connections.

It was nice to get a chance to see her again. The last time we visited I was too young and too sheltered to understand the subtleties of how the rest of my family treated her, or why someone who was Asian wouldn't be welcome in our rich white republican family. Now we get to be outcasts together. She congratulated me on what I've done so far with the company, and told me how brave I was for coming out. I think... she'll be a good ally in all of this. Though I'm mainly just glad that she agreed to be Whitley's guardian. That was a role I was definitely not prepared to take on on my own.

He is definitely going to be a handful for her, but I think that she is also going to be a handful for him. Hopefully he'll learn how not to become our father before it's too late.

No. No. No! I can’t - I hope that - Just when I think I can’t sink any lower in the Dreams, I do. It seems that my return to Hogwarts as an instructor was an even worse idea than I thought it would be here. Not only do I change the course from Defense Against the Dark Arts to the Dark Arts period, I force the students to use spells to torture one another. When I’m not busy using curses on them and torturing them myself of course. What I wouldn’t give for some of that Dreamless Sleep Potion here that we have there.

I know it’s their allowance and they should get to spend it on what they want to, but why why do the girls keep wanting to use them on blind boxes? For what they’re getting, I feel that they’re honestly really expensive. They feel like dollar store grab bags sometimes, just marked up for interesting packaging and being considered a “surprise”. It’s not the money, it’s just that it feels like these toy companies are taking advantage of the kids this way.

I was hired recently by a man who wants me to look into his daughter's personal life, specifically whether or not she's dating the right sort of people, so that he can decide whether or not to keep her in his will. At $150/hour plus all inured expenses paid, it was just too good to pass up.

I'll be following a lead from a very reliable source that she's very interested in volunteering, so I guess I'll have to check out places like Habitat for Humanity and the soup kitchen. Anyone else have any other suggestions?

[Veronica]

This seems like it's going to be a very long, complicated case, and I just don't know if I can't handle it myself. How'd you like to be hired on as a consultant?

Six missed calls, all from the same number. And I have no idea what number it is, I sure as hell am not picking that up. Finally check my messages and it's a divorce attorney??

Do these people even know who I am? Apparently not, or they'd know better.

Divorce Attorney. Balls. The last thing I made a lifelong commitment to went up in flames. No, thank you.

Well I think I just disproved my own theory that if I stayed busy enough I wouldn’t have any dreams this semester at school. I finally found out what the key in my dreams opens up! There was a little curtain off to one side of the hall, and inside is this little tiny door- maybe a foot tall- and the key fits it! I open it up and there’s this really beautiful garden on the other side and I lay there looking at it for a while, wishing that I could get in there but my head won’t even fit through the door.

I finally quit laying on the floor, wishing, and go back to the table I found the key on and now there’s a bottle that has a label that says Drink Me on it! I know it wasn’t there when I first got the key, but it is now and it’s not labeled poison, so I drink it and it tastes pretty good. And after a minute makes me shrink down to the right size to fit through the door but just my dreamluck - I locked the door when I went back to the table and left the key on top of it, and can’t reach it anymore. And no matter how many times I try to climb that table I keep slipping back down to the floor and I finally just give up and start to cry.

And that’s when I woke up here. And found that same bottle on my pillow next to me. A part of me really wants to take a sip and see if it will make me shrink here like it did in the drams but the rest of me is saying “Don’t be stupid Alice. You have no way of reversing the shrinking and can’t take care of Kurt if you’re only ten inches tall! And you definitely can’t go to classes or auditions if you can’t be seen!”

Ah crap, there goes my New Year's Resolution. Who was betting on pet food?

I couldn't help myself. I just had to kill something.

I think this is the closest The Mysterious They who keep track of these things have come to suggesting Millennials are killing off babies.

I wanted some advice. What are peoples' opinions on ... well marrying young. And also the girl asking the boy to marry them.

Thank the Gods that Valentine's day is over. The salon was so utterly jam packed with people they even had me washing hair. Spoiler alert: I'm terrible at it.

Instead of going out, I decided to spend the night with Henry Tilney in Northanger Abbey. Who doesn't love a man with a sharp wit and exceptional taste in muslins?

So who is your favorite Austen hero? Or couple, whatever, and why?

What a magical day today has turned out to be! My broom just came in from the dreams. I can't wait to take this puppy for a spin.

Did anyone else not into football watch the Kitten and Cat bowls today? I look forward to those every year, although now I've got my own tiny fluff to watch and play with. I think he was a little jealous we were watching other cats, though.

I'm so glad the kitten with only one eye got pulled out of the game because he got adopted. Seeing him just tugged at my heartstrings. Laurel and Madison kept wanting every cat they saw, which. Trust me, girls, I understand that. But we've got two dogs, four horses, and a kitten. I don't think we need any more animals right now, and Am does not need me to give him the Look with the two of you.

I hate my dreams, I hate dream me. Seriously, what the fuck. First, I keep staking Scott some kid. Though, I kinda get why he's doing it, to help. But Jesus fuck is he going about it the wrong fucking way...

[Private to Scott McCall]

So, dream me seems to be an extra ass to you, sorry in advance to whatever shit he does. I'm not like that in reality.

Well at least the Dreams, or whatever is behind the gifts we all wake up too from time to time, decided to wait until after my parents went home to drop seven years worth of Hogwarts texts onto my and Regulus’ bed. I should probably just be glad they landed in between the two of us and not on the foot where Aslan was sprawled. That is one conversation with his veterinarian I will happily avoid forever if I can.

[Filter to Magic Guild]
I’m hoping to bring them to the Guild to add to the library so that anyone can look through them. I just don’t have space here for them and I would rather not worry about the girls picking one of them for their bedtime story. Is that alright with everyone?

Finished my second book, and so now it's off to the editor. Which means soon it will be time for everyone's favorite thing again: revisions. Because there's nothing in the world better than rewriting what you already wrote. And yes, I know they're important. Everyone needs to edit their work, and people who think they don't need to anymore... well. That's why I refuse to believe that there are any books in The Vampire Chronicles past The Queen of the Damned. Editors and editing is absolutely a requirement.

It doesn't stop it from being boring as hell, though.

So I'm pretty sure I won't be so lucky in the future with getting Old Lace in and out of our apartment when there's something to fight but I'll worry about that when I have to. She had a great time attacking the zombies but a part of me feels a little bad because those things didn't even stand a chance against her.

As much as Amycus keeps telling me what a bad idea it is and talks me out of doing it, one of these days I will wind up digging a bear filled moat around the house. Why, why do these weird things keep happening?

It's ...

It's everything I ever wanted!

Except 27-pounds seems a little low. I gotta buy two!

I generally don’t say anything about politics because for the most part it’s incredibly boring and why do I want to do anything that I know is just going to bore me? But this government shutdown is something that I just can’t keep quiet about. Because honestly - how do you not comment on an overgrown toddler who’s temper tantrum is affecting an entire country?

For my new year's resolution, I will try to stop killing things.

But can a Millenial change their ways?

I mean, do traditions even matter to Millennials anymore?

Are Millennials feckless? Did I use that word right? I’ve always wanted to use “feckless” in a sentence, but appropriately. If I get it wrong, some octogenarian will probably wave a cane at me.

Just when I think my Dream world decisions can’t get any more questionable they make my Dreamself a teacher at Hogwarts. Teaching Defense Against the Dark Arts, which makes sense because that was one of the subjects I excelled at before I started making all of the wrong decisions with my life there. Of course I can’t just teach that class - I have to change it and teach the kids the Dark Arts. I hate my Dreamself more and more with every Dream I have and just want them over and done with.

I don’t think any of my texts went to the wrong people during our grand annual Halloween tradition of the OC going nuts this year. I sure did get a lot of them, but I don’t think any reached anyone they weren’t supposed to. I’m just glad I didn’t get stuck as my Halloween costume again this year.

One of the texts that got to me was from my mother. I maintain low contact mainly because I’d rather know where she is than be surprised by running into her somewhere I don’t expect her to be. Otherwise I probably would have blocked the number a long time ago. Wasn’t really in the mood to see her political garbage.

So… I’ve just been funneling a lot of emotion into rage cleaning. It’s weirdly productive. Mad about something, just… find an area that needs to be tidied up or scrubbed. Or just resort books or dvds or something. I’ve completely re-alphabetized the girls’ bookshelves, deep cleaned the fridge and freezer, and now that appliances are working again I might clean the oven without fear of it trying to turn itself on during the process. At work, I’ve completely re-organized the library’s back room where the school keeps the copier and die cut machine and all the materials that they both use. To be fair, that last part needed to happen years before I got to it. The library assistant before me must have been one of those “I’m ____ years away from retirement, so I don’t care” kinds.

Funnily enough the main difference between adults and children is adults get creeped out a lot faster and more easily than kids do. Take this whole electronics mess up. Any battery powered toys they have are all talking, singing, walking, dancing, or whatever they are meant to do all on their own, without anyone being anywhere near them. For Amycus and I? This is freaky as hell and seems like the beginning of a horror movie. The twins love it though, it's the greatest thing ever. It's like their toys have come to life to play with them. Again, horrifying concept to an adult. Dream come true to the kids.

...I can't say the four legged kids are that thrilled, though. Apollo has hidden himself under the couch and we've had to stop Aslan from trying to eat a dancing stuffed bear. Chip, I think, is under our bed.

I know it’s been a while since I was a kid, but I… really don’t understand the toys that Madison and Laurel are asking for. Today they both said they wanted a poopsie doll for Christmas. Which is some weird mutant unicorn/human hybrid baby doll. That you feed. And it poops slime. I understand the unicorn part. Every girls go through that stage, I think? I understand the slime part. We’ve made slime together and I buy them slime from the dollar bins at Target all the time. It’s how you get from point A to point B that I really really don’t get?

Do... things just arrive from the dreams? I woke up in the skin-tight blue undersuit for my armor, and my armor was standing there against the wall.