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I CANNOT!

I have ceased to be. Whyyyyyyy?????? It's too cute. Someone hold me.

Subject 89P13.

Guess that's what I was called when they did experiments on me. Dream me. Not me me.

And apparently I got a reputation in the universe. Figures.

We got caught, processed, and sent to this place called the Kyln. And I'm pretty sure dream me was already confident that I'd escape out of there.

Still... subject 89P13. I can see why I chose Rocket.

In the latest installment of "Rocket's weird dreams that might be another life", I find myself going after a bounty. That's right, I'm looking at you Pete. But it doesn't go as planned, Gamora is fighting him (was wondering when I'd see you in my dreams in a non-sexy sort of way) so I tackle her and we're scuffling. I gotta say I'm pretty scrappy fighter for a raccoon that's a third of her size. Told Groot to get Pete in the bag while I had her distracted, but the big idiot didn't know his genders and tried to put HER in the bag. Ruined everything. Anyway she throws me into a glass panel on a completely different level (did I mention that this place has got multiple levels of sidewalks?), and I survived. Apparently whatever experiments they did on me makes me extra durable or some shit.

So anyway Pete jumps down to the lower level to get this shitty orb from Gamora, they fight. He does something that sends her flying through the air, and in that moment Groot finally gets Quill in the bag! You'd think that was the end of it right? No - Gamora comes back and starts cutting at Groot with a sword, cutting pieces of him off until he loses an entire limb. She goes after Quill (again) in the bag, but he stuns her this time and takes off running.

Anyway, long story short in the end I shoot Quill right in the back. Don't worry, I don't kill him. I stun him, and he goes down like a log. I gotta say that part was satisfying after how much trouble he gave me and Groot.

I think that was the first time we all met. Wasn't as happy as I thought it would be considering the fact that we're all friends now. Honestly, I don't even know how we all became friends because right now I'm not sure I like any of them.

So I'm just gonna put this here cuz I just can't keep it to myself anymore. I can't wait for some people to quit thinkin' it's just the water.

I know the right people are gonna know what this means, if they've dreamed that far.

All right, here goes:

I am Groot!

Okay. So...because I haven't been gushing about it...

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I CANNOT! Stefan is keeping her because the Professor gets all serious face about pets, BUT LOOK AT HERRRRRR! I'm crying!!!!!!! WHY IS SHE SO CUTE? I WILL NEVER RECOVER!

Now we're talking with these dreams. I'm a raccoon, that much is a given, and you know what? I've come to accept that somehow my psyche thought a raccoon was the best way for me to work through this PTSD shit. But whatever. Last night was a doozy. Me and the talking tree, whose name is Groot, by the way, become bounty hunters.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Can you believe that shit? And guess what?? We're in fucking space! And there are jails in space, and we got a spaceship, and like the badass that I am in real life I break us out of jails whenever we get caught.

It's great. Keep this up, OC water. These dreams are almost as good as going to the movies.

I keep seeing people mentioning dreams all up on this network. Like it's some trendy thing to do or whatever. Did anyone stop to think that maybe they're putting something in our water, huh, to make us have these fucked up dreams. Like, ain't it weird? I think it's weird. Please tell me I'm not the only one that thinks this shit is for the birds.

So last night, as long as we're all in a sharing mood, I had a dream that wasn't as fucked as my first one, but still... whatever. I don't even know where my brain is coming up with this stuff. I met a tree. A living tree. Now before you get all smart with me and say "all trees are alive", this tree could walk and it had arms. And it could talk. Well, it wasn't that good with talking because all it kept saying was "I am Groot." But like, I understood it? He said those three words over and over, but it translated as long ass sentences in my head.

I'm supposed to go to work in a few, but all I can think about is this damned talking tree. All I gotta say is there better not be any bomb threats today otherwise we're all up shit creek because my headspace ain't in it.

Who else has those moments in their dreams where they just want to grab themselves by the collar and shake themselves really, really hard? You'd think if I was going to obsess over someone, it would be someone I actually like.

Yeah dream self, let's totally go to the abandoned hospital and follow a large trail of blood into a surgical room. That sounds just sounds like the best idea ever. God, I'm glad my alarm clock woke me up before it got any further. I really don't want to know what's beyond that door where the blood trail ends.

You know what? My dreams can go screw themselves. Dream!Tyler is now an orphan, I guess. I almost wish Klaus lived here just so I could rip him apart myself.

But I'm not an orphan here, so I guess the annual Lockwood masquerade party didn't stop after I went away to college. Because there's literally no other way I'd like to spend my Halloween than hanging around with a bunch of politicians and Dad's donors.

[Blossom]

Though it wouldn't be so bad if you came with me. Want to be my date?

You know those old cartoons where the coyote has a boulder or an anvil land on him?

I think I know how that poor bastard feels.

Six stitches, some sore ribs and a few hello kitty band-aids (thanks Bubbles). Three rounds total and I finally got the win. Honestly I was starting to think I wasn't going to. I'd love to fight her again.

Our first football game is on Friday and I've been made a starter! At least there's some benefit to this whole werewolf thing. I expect to see a lot of familiar faces at UCI's first football game of the year.

I don't really know where all my money went this month. Maybe it was the shoes. But I think I'm going to need to get a roommate pretty soon. Anyone need a place to live?

I can't believe my baby girl is one year old today.

Oh my Gosh, the beach was like, a giant Pokemon Party all day today! I got so much sun, though! I definitely should have put on more sunblock! It was bizarre seeing all those people playing on their phones, though. Bizarre and good! I kept hearing people joking and laughing with one another, making up cheers for their team colors and whatnot. The rivalry between Blue and Yellow and Red is hilarious!

So, what team is Valarnet on?

Still tryna catch a plant type for Ivy but I've been busy! Caught a Jigglypuff at a strip club!
( images! )

Why is it when the worst thing I could imagine happens in the dreams, it carries over right away, but when something actually goes right I don't get shit?

It's that time of year again. The time of year that comes a very close second to Christmas.

That's right ladies and gentlemen...

Shark Week is upon us.

So apparently I rescued this cat that was super adorable, but ended up being evil and tried to brainwash the Professor. In my dreams, I mean. And then Fuzzy Lumpkins - who is basically a really furry ...I don't even know, actually. He has antennae and ummm...well, he's just odd - became Mayor? I guess he wasn't actually any more competent than the actual mayor. I was not a fan of having to see the mayor in a wrestling outfit. It was probably mentally scarring. They were wrestling for the mayor's hat.

PRIVATE TO BLOSSOM & BUTTERCUP

What do you two say to coming with me to Stefan's Memorial Day thing?

Dream me is a five year old superhero who fights a talking monkey and a crazy bitch monster.

This can only get more interesting

It might be a long shot, but does anyone on this Network know where a guy might get his hands on some wolfsbane?

Okay Valarnet, on the heels of the super fun weekend I spent in a blonde (Hey Sharon, how's Viv, can I please come babysit soon?) I got a serious question for you guys out there that wake up with nifty new skills.

How likely is it that, one day, I will wake up shooting lasers from my eyes? (Please be aware, I can do this in my dreams, it's not just a random thing I cooked up.) And is there a way I can sort of save my dad the stress and worry of having to rebuild to roof of the house? (Especially since it stands to reason he might need to do it three times.)

Up until now, I never actually worried about it. But now, with the body changing and werewolves being a thing I now accept as normal everything, it's best to get a jump start on this.

So... What's there to do around here?

Our theme song is stuck in my head.

It's worse than when Buttercup gets the Piña Colada song stuck in my head.

On the plus side, it's catchy.

Dream me needs a little bit of chill. I mean, screaming that I can be hardcore is a little much, but then I sort of get it. Someone - well, multiple someones - said I couldn't fight things as scary and difficult as they could. I'm really, really bad at be underestimated.

Someone implemented an anonymous feedback system at Stark Tower. So far so good. We've gotten some constructive criticisms, and I appreciate that.

One note asked if he/she/it could put a garden up on the roof. Sounds great, right? Though, I have no idea to whom to give the go-ahead. Maybe just posting a note here saying "Go for it" is good enough?

Is there a way to introduce yourself on this thing without sounding like a dating profile or some kind of addicts support group? Probably not.

I'm Buttercup. I think my sisters Blossom and Bubbles are on this thing too. And I guess now I am too so you all get the complete set!

Also I do not like piña coladas. Or getting caught in the rain.

Ugh, finals week. I really need to spend more time studying.

On the bright side once it's over I'm on spring break! But no road trip like I originally planned instead I'll be spending the week packing my things... I have too much crap.

Soooo if anyone wants to hang out these next two weeks you'll have to either help me study or pack. (Please help with both :D) Thanks!

If it's my autobiography and I choose to omit certain things, does that mean I'm not being objective enough? I have this feeling I'm going to get hate mail telling me what a liar I am due to the fact I don't want to share absolutely everything with the entire world.

Well I haven't done much of the social media thing since I was in college, but I figured I'd give it a try.

I just moved here from Seattle, the sunshine is a nice change of pace. Wow talking about the weather, lame. Now I just need to find some decent coffee if anyone has recommendations.

Oh right also, my name's Olivia but please call me Liv.

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I just found this and it is actually one of the cutest things I've EVER SEEN!

[Private to Blossom]

I think I had one of those weird dreams people keep talking about.

For sure, these dreams only get odder. And so do their side effects. In the dreams I had red eyes, and now, I do here, too. Not really sure how to feel about this.

What does one do when suddenly one needs sunglasses or contacts to walk outside?

Did anyone watch the puppy bowl? Eeeee! That was my favorite part of the night!