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Could anyone explain to me why I was just attacked by the fucking wreath in my living room!? There I was minding my own business when it suddenly had teeth and tried to fucking strangle me! I blasted that fucker into a million piney pieces, but now I don’t know if any of our other decorations are going to get the bright idea to attack.

So, got my first ever write up at work.

I don't know if all bakeries are the same, but for ours? Large orders require an ID. That way if anyone wants to change it, we can match it and make sure it's our actual customer trying to change it. Apparently there have been issues in the past. So that is just our policy. No ID, we can't change it. That is just how it is

The Karen I dealt with today didn't like that I wouldn't take her word that she was the bride and wouldn't entirely change the size, flavor, and style of a wedding cake for her without trusting she was who she said she was. She kept saying she didn't have her ID on her. It was in her other purse. She didn't drive here so she didn't need it. That I was invading her privacy and this was awful customer service.

Finally she told me to bite her ass. I informed her I didn't have my rabies shots yet and I was sure she tasted awful anyway. So she complained to the manager.

...Does a write up still count if the person giving it is trying not to crack up at the same time?