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I am a bit embarrassed to be asking this on the valarnet of all places, particularly when there are much larger, more important issues to hand right now, but I can NOT keep myself from doing so anyway. Discovering myself, I will be honest and admit to it being myself, there is no good in pretending otherwise, in love with a good friend, a love that cannot possibly be returned due to sexual orientation of at least one of the two potential parties here, has left me confused as to what I ought to be doing next.

Another of our friends suggests that I come out and say it, and take the chance at happiness, but again, I do not think that this friend is like me, and so would never understand where I am coming from, it would cause unhappiness if we tried, and I am relatively content in our friendship the way it is. I only...

The last few weeks, I have considered whether or not we might become something more and whether it is worth attempting such a thing. I did not even know that I could love until so recently, so I am especially confused to find myself in this position. The thing is that, should there be the slightest chance this becomes more, it would be the most amazing thing that has come into my life.

On the flip side, it is patently unfair to ask someone I care for whether they would deal with ME, particularly when they are doubtlessly of a different mindset and preference set than I am, so of course I should not do it.

I am so used to being decisive in all things that I am not sure what's to be done now, but some advice on either side would be incredibly appreciated.

One of the "perks" of being an unofficial cat rescue is that people seem to drop their injured animals off a lot, or the general public lets me know where injured cats ARE and I get to go play rescue. I never COULD leave one alone if I know it's in trouble somewhere, no matter what. Too compassionate toward the little beasties for my own good? Probably am.

At any rate, today was one of those riding out to play Cat Rescue games. As a result of what went down, I'm voice posting this from the E.R where I'm being given antibiodics and some pain meds through an IV. I get to go home after since they think they caught it, but I also get to take augmentin with me, and given that the bite's on my right finger, something tells me that I'm calling out tomorrow.

This is when you really, really start to think about getting a partner or at least assistant with reasonable clinical qualifications to free me up while this is going on. It won't help for tomorrow and very probably my Wednesday-Thursday surgery days (wait damn it IS Wednesday now, isn't it? I don't know, the drugs are good), and I've already made plans involving The View, Dr. Phil and the soaps in my DVR queue, but IS there anyone on this who knows another vet, perhaps a student who could assist with exams if this comes up again?

And how many sympathy kisses do all of you think I can solicit if I take my story to the pub?

Right! People that are going camping with me this weekend, are you ready? I've gotten the camp ground reserved [ADDRESS/DETAILS]. Now what I need from you is assurance you're going to bring your own camping gear! I mean I have a bit of extra around but I sure can't give all you some stuff. I am also asking you help buy some of the food. We can coordinate that here if you would like or people can bring their own but I think it would be nice to have a big picnic at least the first day since not everyone knows each other.

It will be fun! Promise. Lots of swimming, hiking and games. Just don't mind if my brothers start pranking you especially if we decide to tell ghost stories.

Ugh. Definitely starting to show now. Maternity jeans are not fun in the slightest.

In other news, I get the shop all to myself this weekend. Muahahaha. Have fun on the camping trip, boys! Don't mind if I rearrange the whole shop while you're gone.

Three day weekend and the start of summer! I already have almost my entire Summer spoken for which is kind of crazy. My manager is even talking about getting me a tutor and being home schooled next year instead of going back to High School so I can focus on my swimming career. I don't know if I want to do that though. I'd never get to see any of my friends anymore. I guess we'll see how this Summer goes and take it from there?

Would anyone like to go get drinks with me this evening? and possibly light things on fire?

I want to do some sort of fundraising endeavor for OKC, but I do not know what to do. So many people have things that are obvious - restaurants hold dinners, car washes hold car washes - but I do not exactly have ... a fundraiser oriented skillset.

I could just throw a party. Hmm.

I know I swore offa catnaps, but really that seemed like the best way I coulda spent the entirety of my day so far. Now I'm gonna be up all night, though. Guess I just gotta decide if it's a bar or coffee sorta day.

I'd like to say I'm not proud of that dream but...

( teeny spoiler )

I'm good.

DRACO. ZUKO. PETER.

Mario Kart Memorial Day Marathon.

I won't take no for an answer.

For the record, I had nothing to do with the Spanish Inquisition (but the M25 is a personal stroke of genius).



Oh. And also, Arthur has insisted we take in a child teenager. So there's that. Advice and consolations are more than welcome.