( colligo ¬ get collected ) → network.

( The sound of sheets rustling as Gabriel and Jade shift in bed. It’s quiet for a moment, then Gabriel speaks, sounding tired but relaxed. )

Well, that was awesome. ( a pause and then he continues, now sounding hesitant and slightly anxious. ) So...uh...Jade. You know that awkward habit I have that you keep lecturing me about?

( There’s the sound of rustling sheets as Jade settles down against him. Her voice is soft, her tone wary but still laced with amusement. )

Which one? Because, so help me Gabe, if you gave Adam another harebrained idea that’s going to involve me having to lecture him, again, I swear to you...

( Gabriel laughs, because it’s true that he does have a lot of bad habits that Jade lectures him about. He probably should have been more specific, but he’s worried that will get him slapped. He’s quiet for a moment, then he sort of blurts it out. )

You know how we just...and I told Claire and Ruby...and...pleasedon’thitme! ( Yes, children, there is someone who actually scares Gabriel ) I would have waited, but it’s probably better to tell you sooner rather than later since we’ll be dealing with this sooner rather than later. ( a pause to breathe, after that rushed babbling. ) Congratulations! We just made a nephilim.

(For a moment there's silence as Jade tries to wrap her brain around what he just said.) We... (She pauses and tries again.) What do you mean we just... (Another pause.) But I... (Yet another pause.)

You're joking, right?

( Gabriel gives a sigh of relief at not being immediately smacked. )

Would I joke about this? ( a pause ) Don’t answer that. Just don’t answer it. We both know I would, you don’t need to say it. But I’m not. I’m really not joking. ( a pause ) But this is a good thing? Right? I mean...I like babies. You like babies. Babies are generally positive things. Even half-human, half-angel babies. ( a long pause, then cheerfully ) Can we call it Optimus Prime?

(Jade makes a sound that's some odd mix of a laugh and groan.) Yes, it's a good thing. Just unexpected. I didn't even know that I could have kids and now I find out I'm having one immediately after conception - which, for the record, being given a job by the Almighty once does not mean you are to become a walking, talking EPT, so stop doing that . (A pause as she tries to figure out what she was saying before getting sidetracked by fussing at him.)

But yes, it's a good thing. And no, we are not naming it Optimus Prime, and no amount of pouting is changing my mind on that so don't even try it. (There's the sound of shuffling around as Jade snuggles up beside him; she gets quiet and thoughtful for a moment, then her voice sounds slightly alarmed.)

Wait. You said sooner rather than later. What did you mean by that?

( Gabriel sounds more relaxed, now that he knows his girlfriend isn’t going to murder him. ) I guess I can stop announcing pregnancies at awkward moments. Though you have to admit it was funny with Sam and Ruby. And Claire and Dean just deserved it after their kinky shenanigans. I mean...a priest and a nun? Come on! But I’ll stop being the city’s pregnancy alert.

( You can practically hear Gabe grinning ) Fine. Not Optimus Prime. But we do have to give it a last name. And not something boring, like ‘Smith’ or ‘Jones’ or ‘Winchester’. ( a pause ) Skywalker! Come on! It’ll be awesome. The force is strong with this one! ( He’s mostly babbling to distract Jade from...nope, she noticed )

So...uh...Jade. Ever read Breaking Dawn? Kind of like that. But with less blood drinking and spine breaking and death. And I won’t have to gnaw it out of you. That would just be weird.

(She snorts.) Fine. I can handle Skywalker, I guess. It's- (Jade sucks in a sharp breath then all but shouts.) One month? You're telling me that I'm going to be pregnant for one single month?!? Are you insane? (A pause.) Don't answer that. Just... don't. (She sighs.)

A month. This is ridiculous. I'm going to wake up tomorrow unable to even see my feet. Dammit, Gabe! (Another pause.) Well, that settles it. The next kid we have, you're carrying it and I'm going to name it.

Skywalker’s a great name. It’s - ( You can almost hear Gabe cringing ) Maybe a little more than a month. ( A sigh ) It’s not like I planned this, Jade. You know I didn’t. And yes, yes I am kind of insane. This isn’t news. In fact, I thought that was part of my charm. ( He sighs ) I’m sorry I didn’t warn you about the possibility of a mutant baby.

( He brightens at her suggestion ) We can absolutely do that. We can. Just please don’t hit me or throw things at me or stab me with any angel killing blades. Okay? I will absolutely have the next kid...I could probably even do that. Awesome plan. Go team!

I may have gone overboard with my new origami pets. I'm afraid I don't have much room for the elephant any longer, so if you see a five foot, periwinkle coloured elephant walking around outside, don't be alarmed.

If anyone would like one I do have extra, the penguins are getting a little bit antsy in the freezer and the hedgehogs have taken up all the space in my shoes.

I'm so glad Sam gets to be with his family now, he's such a nice guy. I wish you guys all the best.

This seriously needs to end. Now. Not that Bella isn't the most accident prone person ever in the history of time great and all, but I want to be alone with my husband.

( Filtered to Edward Cullen )

Oh bloody hell, this place is getting to me. I actually missed my classroom. Maybe I'm ill again. hmm.

Ruby, my lovely fake-missus, I'll stay in work as long as I can, alright? Although I will have to bring essays back to mark, I always do. Also, have you seen my glasses? I need them for work.

I wanted to spend my wedding night with my husband. Not some stranger.

Screw this. Morgan Freeman, I hate you.

Yesterday, I married the love of my life.

Today, I have no words. I hate this place.

Ruby, Caden's with me. We should try to get together, so he can see you.

Dear Morgan Freeman,

YOU. SUCK.

No love,
Parker

P.S. Damon, I need you to eat someone for me. Grab your enforced significant other and get over here. STAT.

Well this is fun or you know, not at all. Can we rewind and do last night over? My plans for this morning did not include going home with some random guy.

ugh fuck

I'm getting married. In two days. Holy crap.

I never thought this would be happening to me of all people?

Also? I haven't demonstrated any bridezilla tendencies yet, but if any Gremlins even think of crashing my wedding, I am so not going to be happy.

Apparently, stabbing gremlins through the head, and then sticking them in front of the window to expose them to sunlight works marvels.

Just an FYI.

(There's a sound of a first aid kit opening up and being rooted through)

As a fellow resident previously said, do not go out in the dark! Those Gremlins have a mean bite!

If travel after dark is necessary. Walk in groups and carry a very strong flash light!

[ooc: This is posted a touch early as I'm not sure I'll be around for most of tomorrow until the evening, and this is meant to take place around 10AM or so.]

(For a second or two, there's nothing but the sound of a baby crying. Then Meri can be heard speaking, her tone worried and slightly muffled. In the background, there's a banging sound as though someone is pounding on a door.)

Shh, Gabbi, it'll be okay, you'll see.

(There's a bit of shuffling around, Gabbi's crying becomes a bit less audible and Meri's voice louder as she picks back up the PDA and starts speaking into it.)

Daddy? Daddy, I tried t'call just like you showed me but the phone won't work right and-

(The banging gets louder. Meri raises her voice, both out of fear as well as to be heard over the noise.)

Daddy, mommy sent me and Gabbi and Chomper in here and said t'call and there's these little monsters and they 'lectrotued mommy and the lights all went off and now they're trying to get into the bathroom where me and Chomper and Gabbi are. (She draws in a big breath; there's the sound of wood cracking.)

Daddy, you gots to come home RIGHT NOW cause I only gots four shots and there's least seven of them and-

(The door splinters, there's a clatter as the PDA is dropped followed by an inhuman growl of sorts and a snarl from a baby-sized velociraptor. Then two shots from a shotgun echo over the PDA with Meri's voice, a bit distantly, shouting for something to 'Go on, get OUT of here!')

Why not?

( Stuff you were just dying to know about Ruby. )

Either I'm seeing things or Yukon fucking Cornelius just walked into the casino.

There is a Christmas tree decked out in french fries in our living room. We came back from getting a tree with Caden...and it was there.

So now, we have two trees. Caden's currently wondering if this means Santa will bring him extra presents.

Who the FUCK broke into our house?!

Well, that definitely went quicker than last time. Then again, last time was twins, so it's not too surprising.

As of a little over two and a half hours ago, Jack and Meri officially have a little sister. Samara Gabrielle Winchester. Yes, I know. It's the creepy little girl in the Ring. But that's not why we picked it. And I don't think she's going to be an evil little demon child. She and Claire are perfectly healthy and should be coming home in a day or two.

Just wanted to give folks an update and, since I'm too damn tired to figure out who all I need to filter this to, you all get it.

Hey baby. I was going to text but my phone is being stupid and won't let me use the text option for some reason.

Not to freak out or anything but do you think you could wrap up work at the garage a little early? It's just that I think I might be in labor. Maybe. Possibly. I mean, it could be Braxton Hicks but I'm not sure I want to take that chance.

So, you know, whenever you can get here so we can swing by the clinic, that would be awesome.

Love you!

(edited to the post two minutes later)
Actually? I take it back. I'm pretty sure I'm definitely in labor.

My water just broke.

Is this place heaven? If it is, the Bible definitely has it wrong as this is not what I pictured at all. I was just at home and the next thing I know, I'm in a library and being dragged out by suits of armor that wouldn't answer any of my questions!

.....And I must be hallucinating because I just saw a talking snowman that bears a strong resemblance to the snowman in the Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer Christmas special my son watches.

Can someone please tell me what is going on?

( Filtered to Friends and Family )

( Filtered to John Winchester (yes, he's included in the above filter as well) )

[ooc: as claire and dean know WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE to list separately, if you think your character(s) would be invited/included as friends or family, feel free to have them respond!]

That was fucked up. Screw you Uncle Morgan Freeman. Was that about the porn? It was about the porn, wasn't it? Dick move there. Santa's so giving you coal this year.

Hey, Ruby? Sorry for macking on your fiance. Please don't stab me. Sammy, sorry for macking on you. I don't actually think of you that way. It's not me. It's you. Specifically your dick and my lack of interest in it.

Oh! And congrats on the cambion. Good work there, kids!

Jade, I'm not gay. I'm really not gay. Want me to show you just how not gay I am?

Okay, I don't know what the hell's going on here, or why I woke up in a library surrounded by pushy suits of armor, but I hope there's someone here who can help me gank the bastards who did this like yesterday so that I can get back to work.

Sam and Dean I've been looking for you both for a while now and just flew into town. There's something very important I need to tell you both.

I got hit in the head helping deal with a ghost and it brought back some memories I had forgotten due to amnesia.

John isn't your father.

I am.

Seeing all these weddings just make me even more excited to start planning my wedding.

For some reason storage playing Christmas mustard now seems weird after July when now is when it should be played. Oh well, I suppose I'll get used to it.

Huck, we should totally get a chronology treatment....ok now I know my PDA is definitely wanked....W H A C K E D. What I meant before was Christmas tree..oh good that worked. What do you think?

Also, with the recent marriages, should we be on baby watch? Kidding...or am I?

Sam asked me to marry him.

I said yes.

For the first Thanksgiving I've ever actually celebrated? I'd say this makes it pretty damn amazing.

Um...what's going on?

I said I was sorry.

Oh! Wait! Is this like the one where you got sent to an alternate reality? Because I really have to say, that kind of pushed the suspension of disbelief. I mean...I know it actually happened, but come on. Who would name a kid Jared Padalecki? And if Castiel was an actor, even in an alternate universe, he wouldn't be like that Misha Collins character. He just wouldn't.

Anyone wanting to come by for Thanksgiving supper tomorrow is welcome. Meal will be on the table by four.

The more, the merrier.

I just realised that I missed my birthday.

I'm back to myself, and...I know a lot of people were hurt and affected...and I'm sorry. </s>I remember everything.</s> Words aren't enough.

( Claire )

( Ruby )

Well, that fucking sucked.

Someone needs to tell me where my wife is. Right fucking now.

I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack!

Sammykins, we need to have a little talk.

( Edit ): Apparently I got a kid when I was gone. Good thing I got some practice. Who'd have thought that would come in handy.

Not surprisingly in the slightest, dying is not more fun the second time around. Although the waiting was certainly better this time.

I'm so very pleased to see that the damages to the city have finally been completed. It's looking quite nice.

Oh! The new arcade is also quite impressive, Junior. It's almost as though you know me.

[ooc: Claire was kidnapped by Lucifer, who was trying lure Caden out of the Roadhouse. Claire got in between them, and Ruby's PDA went off when Caden ran back to tell her about Daddy vanishing with his aunt.]

Caden? What's the matter, sweetie?

[There's the sound of Caden's voice, coming through very rushed as he explains to his mother what happened.]

Caden, slow down. You said Daddy grabbed Auntie Claire and left with her?

[There's no sound, as Caden just nods his affirmation. Ruby curses lightly under breath, her tone growing serious.]

Caden, I want you to listen to me very carefully. I want you find Jack and Meri and come straight back to me. You guys can still play, but can only play where I can see you, okay? And no matter what, I don't want you guys going anywhere near the door, okay? I know being stuck inside isn't very much fun, but I promise we'll be able to go home soon, okay?

[Caden's voice comes over again, and Ruby's quiet for a second as she hugs her son.]

It's be okay. Soon we'll be able to go home, and we'll have french fries with Daddy. I promise.

Excuse me? I'd like to speak to the person in charge. I have to solo at a benefit concert tonight. Starving children in Bulgaria are counting on me being there to make all those rich people happy.


((ooc: meet concert violinist hardison! he's rich. and famous! his violin is named lucile--please don't hurt her or alec will have to cut you. ;p))

What. The. Actual. Fuck?!? </s>I picked one hell of a time to have a god-damned flashback.</s>

I'm thinking maybe I should stay with some folks for a bit. I know I've got a flat of my own that's gonna have someone else here, but he's a little dead right now. So, way I see it, I reckon staying with somebody else until he comes back might be smart on account of me only being eleven.

( Filtered to Michael and Lucifer )

( Nate's voice is weak and a little slurred. )

El? You there?

I...Jo is...she's...

( a pause )

I think I could use some help.

( OOC: This is an actually accidental post, not a product of the Glitch Plot. Nate was trying to call Ellen and didn't hit the right buttons. Set shortly after this, once Nate managed to regain consciousness. )

[There's the sound of the PDA, and Ruby's voice can be heard. Her tone is hushed, almost in a whisper, and very weak.]

I don't have much time. He's not here right now, but he's going to come back. I know he's going to come back.

He drained me of so much of my blood...I can barely move right now. I think I'm in the bathtub, but I can't tell. The lights are off, and I can't get up to turn on the light.

[Her voice shakes, and Ruby mutters senselessly for a bit. When she snaps back to her senses, her tone is pleading.]

Please. Someone help me. I don't want to be here with him.

[She continues talking, not even paying attention to the PDA.]

I want Sam back. Give him back.

Peter, if we don't get back to Neverland soon, the boys will be worried about us.

(OOC: As a head's up, Ruby is currently convinced that she's Tinkerbell.)

Halloween, how I loath you. Halloween is supposed to be the one bloody night that the supernatural takes off, but do I think that will happen here? Not bloody likely with this city's track record. So, I'm opting out. If anyone needs me tonight I'll be in my flat, watching It's The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown.

I think there's a chance that I might actually be more excited for Halloween than my son.

The lesson I learned from the events of this past week? Be careful what you ask for. Especially when it's things like "I wish I could get drunk like other people" and "If only I remembered what pain felt like".

( Filtered to future!Dean )

( Filtered to Ruby )

( Filtered to Castiel )

Dear Morgan Freeman,

I like you. I do. I think you're awesome and I stick up for you. I even don't steal too many things from the library because it's your stuff and I don't want to steal from you.

But turning stuff into gold only when I'm touching it? That's just MEAN and now I'm mad at you. And payback is never cheap.

You've been warned. So have your plucky knights.

♥ Parker

It would seem that my normal abilities have been replaced with the ability to communicate telepathically. With bunny rabbits. And only bunny rabbits.
( Sam )
( Jade )

So after looking through more magazines than any one person should ever look through, I finally picked a haircut and went for it. I can do all sorts of different styles, even though it's short, and it'll take a little getting used to but I do like it.

If you hate it, however, blame Elle. She's the one with the scissors. Of course, she's also the one with the temper and the ability to electrocute you so...

Actually, on second thought, blame me. Not Elle. Just to be on the safe side.

Lilith is gone. I don't know how, and I don't really care, but she is.

Good riddance.