( colligo ¬ get collected ) → network.

After many carefully controlled, scientific experiments in which I volunteered myself as the guinea pig, I have come to the conclusion that smoking weed will not, in fact, restore memories. I also do not feel, for reasons I can explain if one wishes to truly know, that smoking weed is the reason I don't currently have memories. Unless all of you are very, very stoned as well, in which case I might have to rethink that particular stance.

I've also discovered, after examining this apartment where I found myself, that I either have a terrible decorating style or this place came furnished. I would, of course, need to see the other apartments in this building to reach a firm decision on that particular quandary, but I'm currently leaning toward it being pre-furnished. I don't really see myself as the kind of guy who would have floral arrangements that match the drapes.

That is all for now. Thank you for your time; it's been greatly appreciated.

Guys. I just had a thought.

Do you think I'm going to be a werewolf now?

Because I got mauled by a werewolf. But I didn't die. And I didn't really think about it until now, but doesn't that mean I'm going to be one too?

I don't want to be a werewolf.

So I'm in a strange city on another planet, because of a god who isn't the god who wanted us sacrificed, and I'm not dead and Marty isn't dead and Jules isn't dead. And okay. That's fine. It's good. Bring Curt and Holden here and it'll be awesome.

But then I woke up this morning with a ring on my finger and a man I don't know and this is not okay. It isn't. It's just not.

I'm sorry I screamed and threw a lamp at you, guy I woke up with. And then locked myself in the bathroom and cried. For three hours. In retrospect, that might have been an overreaction. But I've kind of had a rough few days.

Marty? Jules? Are you guys okay? You're still here, right?

[The PDA turns on, and Jules sounds panicked.]

Where...where am I? What's going on?

A library? Why the hell am in a library? I was...

[Her voice catches.]

I died. Those...those things cut my head off and now I'm in a fucking library?! And I don't even know if Curt's okay...

[A pause]

...I'm also mostly naked. No shirt, no shoes, no shorts, just panties. I couldn't at least be given some goddamn clothes in wherever here is? I'm pretty sure being mostly nude in strange libraries is illegal anywhere...

[She spots the knights, and makes her way towards them.]

Hello? Sorry about the mostly-nudity, but can you help me? I have no idea how I got here.

[Pause, as the knights hand her the pda.]

A phone. Thanks but that doesn't really explain how I got here - hey! Let me go!

[Jules can be heard struggling as the knights carry her out of the library, and the door is heard slamming shut behind her.]

Great. So now I'm mostly naked, in a strange...city, with nothing but a phone and no idea how I got here. And I should be dead.

[A sigh.]

That's not awkward and confusing. Not at all.

( Dana sounds confused, and a little out of it )

Hey...you end the world and get a free trip to a library. That's different. ( a pause ) Are you seeing this, Marty? Did...Is this what pot does? I don't think this is the pot...but maybe it's the pot.

[there’s a slight pause before Marty replies; he somehow manages to sound both extremely wary, somewhat confused, and very, very stoned]

Huh. [another pause] No, it's definitely not that. This is... [another pause] actually, Dana, I don't even fucking know what this is. [a slight pause] Aside from being a library, obviously.

[yet another pause; his tone slowly goes from wary to curious]

Hey. You still have that joint?

Huh. ( a slightly pained laugh ) Hey, Marty? The world's ending. And we're in a library. ( another laugh, a little hysterical ) Our friends are dead and the world's ending and we're in a library. And Jules told me no studying. How is this...how is this even our life?

( a pause )

Yeah. Yeah...here. ( another pause ) Marty? I'm glad I didn't shoot you.

[for a moment, there’s nothing more than the sound of someone clearly inhaling something; when Marty does speak again, he's obviously exhaling heavily as well]

I'm glad you didn’t shoot me too. [another pause] I wish I could have stopped you without having to resort to letting a werewolf mortally wound you through vicious mauling. You deserved better.

[another heavy exhale then he gives a soft half-laugh]

Hey. Dana. I just thought... what if this is it?

It's okay, Marty. ( quietly ) This is what I deserve. It's my fault. I was the one who made those...things come. I'm the reason Jules is dead. And Curt. And Holden. Maybe if it had been something else...maybe...maybe... And I was going to shoot you. Maybe. What kind of person does that? Who even... ( she trails off ) Pass that back, would you?

( a pause, then confused )

What if...like the ancient gods are really big on the reading? Or...like...heaven...or hell...or...whatever...has a lot of books?

[there's a bit of shuffling around as Marty hands the joint back over; he's silent for a moment, considering what she said]

To be totally fair, you were trying to save the world. For what it’s worth. [a quick pause] More or less.

[another pause and he sighs heavily]

You know, Dana, at this point that is entirely possible. If giant, evil gods can live in the core of the planet and are only appeased by human fucking sacrifice, resulting in a massive worldwide conspiracy to murder innocent people in really cliched ways, then why can't the afterlife be a giant library? Sounds about right, come to think of it.

[there's another pause then he shifts about]

Of course, that doesn’t explain why you're still bleeding out. [a slight pause; his tone turns concerned and somewhat small sounding] Anything I can do?

( there’s a pause and a long exhale before Dana speaks, as she clearly takes a hit off the joint )

I was...but you were right. If saving the world means killing my friends...why do I want to save that? The world didn't do anything for us. And they’d just keep doing it. Over and over and over. And more people would die and...no. Time for something new.

( a pause )

I kind of like it. All these books. It's nice, you know? Calm. Peaceful. There are worse places to be. And you're here...so there’s that. ( another pause and a sigh ) Don't worry about me, Marty. I'll be fine. I don't feel a thing.

( another pause and a sharp intake of breath )

Huh... ( yet another pause ) Giant evil gods...I thought they'd be taller.

[another pause, then Marty can’t help but give a humorless bark of laughter]

Definitely taller. Hey guys. 'Sup?

[the telltale sound of the guards moving closer to them can be heard; there's a soft groan as Marty forces himself to his feet and takes a few steps to place himself between Dana and the advancing guards]

Seriously. Nice place you've got here. Very... educational looking. [another pause; Marty starts to sound a bit more on edge]

Right. Big, strong, silent types. I can dig it. [he clears his throat] Hey, Dana. I don't suppose there is any chance you could get up right now and, you know, run for your life. [a pause] Again.

( Dana's quiet while Marty talks to the knights, then remains quiet for a moment )

Get up...right...just...give me a second... ( a pause and the sound of Dana struggling to her feet, slipping in the blood on the floor before righting herself ) Run? Now? Can we get to the running now? I don’t know how much longer I can...ugh...screw this. ( the sound of something being picked up and thrown at the knights, clanging against the metal ) Marty. Running. Now.

[Marty sucks in a sharp breath.]

Right. Running. In a library. From giant, evil gods. Sounds like a- [he trails off then, after a look around, announces] door. To the door. Come on, let’s go. [there's the sound of footsteps, not quite as fast as usual considering Marty is making sure to keep hold of Dana's hand; the guards can be heard following after them, before there's a loud creaking sound and Marty's tone turns slightly hopeful]

Hey, look. It's opening. That's... a little creepy and probably going to end horribly for us, but points for an easy escape this time, yeah?

( Dana starts laughing again )

We're running...in a library. Oh god, we’re not supposed to run in libraries. Freaking zombies and gods and...I'm worried about running in a library. Right. Priorities. ( the sound of running and stumbling before they get to the door ) Open it. Open it. I don't care what's out there...we just need to get out. Well...I care. What do you think is out there? Monsters? Fire? Some kind of horrible...

( a pause, as they get outside )

...city? A...really normal, not horrible city?

( a pause, then the knights toss them the PDAs )

...We're in a city. And the evil gods just gave us phones. What... ( a pause as she sits on the steps ) I still have the joint. I think we need it.