( colligo ¬ get collected ) → network.

I love these things.

( Steph's answers )

So, I robbed a bank with Spider-Man.

That's a thing that happened.

I am so never living that one down.

I need Jello. All the Jello.

You know when you have one of those weird fucking days where you meet your long-lost-forgotten twin brother. Then you find out you can do parkour in your sleep, but that's not right before you find a fucking murder victim on the side of the goddamn road and then watch the fucker explode when the sun hits the guy.

[ There's a pause. ]

Yeah. Um...So nice weather we're having, right? Or any even more serious question. Anyone else feel like they're missing someone a lot? Something along the lines of 'she needs to be safe' and 'I need to find her'. But don't know who the Hell you're supposed to be looking for or where to start looking for that matter.

I'm not sure how this happened, but apparently I like weapons - like a lot. They are all over this apartment that I woke up in. I guess they are mine. Nobody has come in and told me to get out. I also don't know why the Billy Idol look alike is here, and when I got into that. He is cute, in this older, kind of sexy sort of way. I'm also knocked up. This is not weight gain. Weird. Makes me wonder if Billy Idol did it? I feel like I should be on one of those weird talk shows 'Billy, you are the father!' UGH, so not needed.

Well, I'm not in an air vent. I don't have any prosthetic limbs, and I'm not Russian.

I am however, in a sort of...homeless shelter. But I'm pretty sure I'm not homeless. I guess I work here. With my girlfriend. I've taken to assuming she's my girlfriend. Because she's pretty hot we woke up all over each other.

So...that's a thing.

Also, I'm pretty sure I saw someone who looks just like me here. So...twin guy? If you're out there? Respond.

I don't know who took me, or how you made me forget who I am, but you really messed up when you left this shotgun in here with me because I might not know my name or none of that but I do know how to use a gun I think. So unless you want me to shoot you, stay away from this room and give me back my memories!!!

I woke up in the middle of a grocery store...with absolutely no idea who I am and how I got there in the first place. Which is strange. You think I'd remember at least my name. And how I got there.

Also...to whoever was with me, I apologize for screaming and freaking out the way I did. I really wasn't making things any better.

[ooc: If someone wants to be the person who was in the store with Jules, feel free.]

I'm not even sure that was even a punishment, Asaph. Except maybe the kid. So it seems like I'm back and Isabel isn't here so that means I'm without work. Anyone willing to hire a mildly attractive man who's pretty handy with just about anything he can get his hands on? [ A pause. ] That can be taken anyway you guys want to take it.

[ He chuckles a little. ] But I'm not doing any strip teases.


[ filtered to: stephanie brown ]

Let me take you out for some drinks. [ There's a slight pause. ] Then we can go kick some bad guys asses. I'm pretty sure petty criminals never sleep.

[ There’s a bit of an awkward silence for the longest time since Aaron is just simply sitting up in the bed he woke up in next to the person he woke up, there’s a little shuffling around but mostly it’s just him breathing and sort of dazed. ]

Well, well...this is a pleasant surprise. Steph? Hey, Stephhhhhhh...rise 'n shine.

( There’s some mumbling as Steph shifts in the bed, and a low, displeased noise, before she finally speaks, sounding half-asleep and not especially coherent )

Mrrph...go 'way. Too early for your...sciencing or whatever... ( a pause ) Five...hundred more minutes, 'kay?

[ Aaron laughs a bit and lays down in bed, propping his head on his hand as he watches her for a moment before reaching over and slightly patting her cheek. ]

I’m not the sciencing type, Steph. [ Another pause and she’s still not moving before he reaches over and ruffles her hair a bit. ] Steph, Jesus Christ get up you lazy ass.

( There's a confused noise, then Steph seems to realize that she’s not in bed with Sherlock, and she sits up with a startled sound that turns into a surprised gasp )

You...are so not Sherlock. This is such a step up. You have no idea. ( pause ) Wait...you’re not Clint...you’re not nearly sleeveless enough...but you know me...so...( a pause ) OH MY GOD...did you finally settle your tragic divorce from Barbie, Ken doll?

[ Aaron’s always a step up from Sherlock. (Sorry Sherlock). Aaron nearly rolls off the bed with a loud laugh. ]

Last time I checked I wasn’t Sherlock...might’ve had a cover with the name Sherlock once. But that’s because I was bored. [ He laughs. ] Barbie was a bitch. She took everything, all I got to keep was my clothes. [ A pause. ] So...did you club me over the head and bring me to your bed? You could’ve just asked Steph.

( Steph laughs, clearly more awake now and delighted with the new bed partner. Sorry, Sherlock, but she's really happy not to have to worry about severed heads in the fridge and stuff. Also, Aaron’s prettier. When she speaks, it's with mock indignation )

That bitch. ( a laugh ) Well, she may have gotten the car and the dreamhouse, but at least you got to keep your dignity...and your collection of various pairs of brightly colored boardshorts. ( a pause ) Though...now that I think about it, those might be mutually exclusive... ( another pause ) Actually, Asaph brought you back...you know...because reasons. And you showed up in the middle of a thing that was happening. ( another pause as she holds up her hand to show off the ring ) Congratulations, we're fake married.

[ Aaron is way prettier than Sherlock, thank you very much. He stifles another laugh against the palm of his hand because this way too amusing even for him. ] We don’t talk about the collection of brightly colored boardshorts. I’m not particularly proud of them. They’re...flowery. Most of them are pink I think.

[ A pause. ] I woke up in the middle of a thing that...fake marries people? Are we fake dog owners too? Do we have fake hedges?

( more under cut )

All you adults are stupid. Really really stupid.

You're all bickering and worried about your stupid grown up problems and ignoring everyone else.

And meanwhile someone KILLED MY SISTER. My twin sister. What kind of stupid adult kills a ten year old and no one else notices or says nothing?

So I'm gonna take my baby sister and look after her, cause it's pretty clear nobody else is good at it.

I hate you all and you're all stupid.

So, is everyone back to themselves? Or have we just had a mini-wave of people turning back early?

Hey. Selina. I have a baby I need to return to you. You know, if you want.

I'm bored. And I want to do something. Ideas?

( Aaron )
So, your name is Ken? That's a weird nickname for Aaron.

Well fuck that.

Just fuck it. A lot.

And fuck you, Uncle Asaph.

( OOC: Fear not, children. Gabriel has made it so the curse words appear as something less offensive when kids read it. For purposes of children, the role of the word 'fuck' will be played by the word 'banana'. You're welcome. What? He wasn't going to be obvious and use the word 'fudge'. He likes fudge. It's delicious. )

You know, I honest to God thought they were bullshitting when they said joinin' the army would take you to places you ain't even heard of. Or allowed to talk about. Jesus...fu--is this one of those 'ask too many questions or we'll slice off your balls' sort of thing? Cos if so...just point me in the direction of where you guys want me to shoot some bad guys and we'll be golden.

[ A pause.

Longer than usual pause and then Kenneth coughs a little. ]

Where's Sargent Lyons? Does anyone know where I can report in?

( Voice Post )

Well I'm not against spending a weekend in an exotic location but this is not what I would have in mind.

(annoyed sigh)

Hello? Who else is on this? Buffy?

Well, that was a suitably horrifying experience.

Thor, buddy. Two things.

1) It's just Clint. You seriously don't have to call me 'man with the eyes of a hawk'.

2) New Rule: You're not allowed anything. Ever. If you feel the urge to explain something? Don't.

( Bruce )
Hey, dad.

[ There's some shuffling going around in the background because...well, Aaron just finished avoiding the library guards for a little more than a couple hours before they grabbed a hold of him...the struggling and sound of Aaron hitting the guard statues was enough to turn on his PDA before he was so gracefully brought into the city. ]

Either the Philippines have gotten a new police force that gives out free PDAs or...well, I'm not even sure what's going on at this point. [ Aaron's pretty much talking at himself, he's trying to catalogue the sequence of events that took place before showing up in the library. The dull pain in his leg was a reminder that it wasn't a dream. ] Does anyone know what's going on here or do I have to guess?

Because nothing I'm coming up with makes sense. And I'm pretty sure Hell wouldn't look like this. [ He'd bring up Marta but he'd rather keep her off the radar just in case this was all a ruse to give up her location. An extremely elaborate ruse. ]