( colligo ¬ get collected ) → network.

( Danny's answers )

Okay, so many things were wrong with that. SO MANY THINGS.

Cordy, I'm sorry I said you were a hooker with daddy issues. And I'm really sorry you spent two weeks thinking you were Peter's girlfriend.

Peter, let's never talk about that again. Ever. Except the part where you named yourself after Chris Argent. That was hilarious.

Katie, thank you for not showing any interest in me, because if we'd hooked up while we were all amnesia-y, Peter would think he was right. And he's never right.

Danny, I can't believe you called yourself Jackson. Seriously. Nobody wants to be Jackson. I should probably ask about the whole asking me out thing, but I don't really want to get rejected, so I'm going to pretend it never happened.

After many carefully controlled, scientific experiments in which I volunteered myself as the guinea pig, I have come to the conclusion that smoking weed will not, in fact, restore memories. I also do not feel, for reasons I can explain if one wishes to truly know, that smoking weed is the reason I don't currently have memories. Unless all of you are very, very stoned as well, in which case I might have to rethink that particular stance.

I've also discovered, after examining this apartment where I found myself, that I either have a terrible decorating style or this place came furnished. I would, of course, need to see the other apartments in this building to reach a firm decision on that particular quandary, but I'm currently leaning toward it being pre-furnished. I don't really see myself as the kind of guy who would have floral arrangements that match the drapes.

That is all for now. Thank you for your time; it's been greatly appreciated.

So I'm in this apartment and I'm not sure what's going on, except I apparently have weird amnesia, like everyone else around here. Oh, and my dad's here. I'd think maybe I just had a thing for really older guys, but he has a trampy girlfriend. Who's way too young to replace my mom. I have serious problems with this. I don't remember anything, but I'm pretty sure I have problems with this. Her name's probably something stupid like Brandi with an I or Tiffani also with an I or something trashy

Does anyone need help with anything? Because I could probably help with stuff if anyone needs it. And I really want to get out of here.

( Edit: Added later, filtered against "Chris" and "Angela", and all adults...but especially those two )
So my dad and his skanky girlfriend are going out. Who wants to come over? I'm thinking party. Who's up for it? We all have amnesia. May as well have some fun.

Because this isn't awkward at all or anything. Not that my "wife" isn't a nice person or anything. Charlie's actually really cool.

What the -

No. No, no, no. This is so wrong. This is wrong on all levels.

I have girl parts. That is not okay!

Abort. Abort.

Someone needs to fix this now.

Or kill me.

Killing me works too.

Oh god...is this on? Fuck. Fucking fuck.

Someone want to tell me where the hell I am? Those knights or whatever they are weren't very helpful.

</s>Definitely not Beacon Hills. Or California. Unless someone drugged me and dragged me to some crack-out version of Disneyland. And if it is, I'm blaming Jackson, just because weird shit seems to follow him everywhere lately.</s>