( colligo ¬ get collected ) → network.

I guess Asaph really wants me to fill this thing out. Not sure why.

( Adam's answers. )

It won't leave me alone...while I'm trying to sleep.

( Shut up Adam )

Well that blows.

Seriously, Freeman, why would you even show me that crap? What was the point?

( Filtered to Lucifer )

( Filtered to Ruby )

[ There's a slight bit of static before there's a rush of sound someone screaming before they are silenced. Before the PDA shuts off before turning back on again. ]

How--

Why in the world would...one choose that? [ A pause. Cos Mike's losing his composure a little. ] WHY WOULD YOU CHOOSE THAT?! [ Another pause, there's crying in the background. ] Demon, tell me would you choose that? Choose...humanity? Choose emotions? [ There's just some crying before Michael...smites a bitch. ]

Asaph, Mother, I do not agree to this method of torture.

Well, at least I have a change of clothes this time. Definitely better than the first time I woke up in the morgue. Not that that's saying much. Also, no need to investigate what happened to me, in case anyone was going to do that. Mostly because it's me and no one should be surprised I wound up here when I had no idea who I was.

Dean, baby, come pick me up? I'd really like to come home now and not think you're some sketchy old guy running some religious cult. That would be awesome.

Lucifer, if you'd bring Meri home, I'd appreciate it. And no, I don't care if she wants to live with you. She doesn't get a vote. Thanks!

[ There's the sound of feathers the moment Michael was kicked out of the library, searching for the highest point in the city to overlook just where he was. Eternal torment and pain didn't really match-up to a library after all. And he was not overpowered typically.

Nothing had the power to open that cage. He knew that. ]

If this be one of your games, brother, I will certainly make you suffer. [ A pause. But he did plan on making Lucifer suffer, didn't he? ] Come out and FACE ME! Or I will burn this place to the ground searching for you. [ Clearly he's not so much screaming at the PDA as he is...the emptiness of the sky and waiting to hear or see Lucifer. ]

With how mild this latest "experiment" of Asaph's was, I get the distinct impression something much worse is likely coming soon.

Also, if anyone would like to keep complaining say that being stuck with someone else for a while wasn't very mild, make sure you've taken the time to either reflect on or, in the cases of new arrivals, learn about, the things that have happened in this city over the years. Then get back to me on how awful this most recent situation supposedly happened to be.

Okay, this is dumb. This needs to be over now, Asaph. I want my bed back. And my stuff. And my family. My real family, not these people you've got me staying with.

Seriously. End this already. It's been over a week and it's just stupid, now. Not that it was all that smart at first anyway.

This was only fun when I did it myself, Uncle. It's not now! CHANGE ME BACK!

You know, I'm fairly sure that Gabe fixed up the city the last time I was here. Which means, apparently, Asaph's been at it again. Suppose it's good to know some things never change, at any rate.

I knew this place was too weird to not be real.

Not that I'm complaining. Being dead sucks.

Is Sam still-

So. Who missed me?

Right. So. Hi. I'm Sam, and I have no idea what is going on.

Any chance someone out there could offer up an explanation?

Okay, Freeman. I filled the stupid thing out. Now give me back full use of my PDA already.

( Here. )

I was wondering when one of these was going to show up again.

( Sure, why not? )

Well, glad that's over and done with.

You guys really stepped up. Good on you. Bravo. All that. Gold stars all around.

To be fair, some of your gold stars look like this:



But still. You get a star. So that's fun.

( Parker )
So, about that whole blown up casino thing.

Want me to fix that?

Man, what is with this place and the constant threats? I'm all for a battle as much as the next guy but fuck this is ridiculous. You don't just toss somebody out of the library and into this shit. It's just bad for business, that's just all there is to it.

Now. Someone want to help me out and tell me the easiest way to kill these things or should I just go for mass genocide of the levitating tin cans and robots and call it a day?

Well, that was fun in a way that really, really wasn't. So. What did I miss?

Oh! Doctor. I have something for you. It's a little dusty, after all of this time, but it should still work. Better late than never, right?

There's a bit of a problem.

It would appear Claire is...well...gone.

Hey. Psst. Hey! Guess what!

Tomorrow is mine and Jack's birthday party! We're gonna be eleven whole years old! Well. Not until Tuesday, but we're still celebrating tomorrow, which is the most important part if you ask me.

Now I know my mom already invited friends and stuff over. But that doesn't help me get even more presents so But if other people want to come too and weren't on that list just because my mom forgot to add you or something, you can still come! You just need to tell us so we can make sure to have cake and ice cream and pizza and stuff for you.

Oh! And the party's at four. At the Roadhouse. It's gonna rock!

( Filtered to Lucifer )

I guess Asaph just can't get enough of me, it seems. Might almost be flattered, if something didn't always happen to turn this place on its ear not long after I show back up. Still. This beats the alternative.

Now, who all is still around? Front and center.

Well, it certainly is nice to see so many people in such good spirits. The people really are embracing the true meaning of the Christmas, if the kindness and generosity I've seen so far is anything to go by. It's wonderfully refreshing.

And it is, of course, so nice to be back here again.

If I hear one more caroller attempt to squawk out a rather terrible rendition of the birth of The Son, I am not to be held responsible for my actions. They certainly had it coming.

Furthermore, if another miniature-sized local attempts to toss a snowball at my car, it will not end well for them.

Now. With that out of the way, who is still here and worth mentioning?

Okay, so, quick question. Did someone who looks like me or one of my psycho alternate selves show up and I just somehow missed the memo? Anybody know? Or did locals start looking like us, maybe? Because I'm pretty sure I just saw someone who could pass as my twin, across the street from my store.

Or, you know, I could just be losing my mind. I guess that's also a possibility. 'Tis the season, after all.

So...the devil just texted me. Because apparently this is my life.

Which, okay...weird enough on it's own.

But he texted me because he apparently felt like he needed to tell me Merry Christmas. With a winking emoticon. Which is levels of creepy I can't quite deal with right now.

And...I have a hand now. Well...two of them. So...that's a thing that happened.

Yeah. I don't know either.

[ooc: if your character thinks they might be included in claire's very general filter, they probably are]

Right, so December is a pretty busy month for us, what with all three kids having birthdays as well as Christmas. And considering it's Colligo, we pretty much know the idea of celebrating the holidays on the actual date in question is just plain dumb. It never works out.

So. Here's the plan.

( Click to see the party dates. )

We're going to be having Christmas dinner, and presents, on Christmas Eve. Just in case. If anyone wants to stop by, we can definitely set something up. Or come visit you, if you really want to brave the kids running around your place.

( Filtered to Lucifer )

To the Residents of Building C:

Pay no attention to the fire alarms sounding in the corridors. No one is in any immediate danger. Gabriel simply decided to bring a ridiculous eyesore of a tree into our living room for the remainder of the month. I objected.

The snow is so lovely. It's been ages since I've seen any, and I'd forgotten how wonderful it could be.

Ruby, we should go skating in the park. I just think it would fun. Don't you?

The tree is really quite nice, though I still don't understand exactly what it's for. Still, I like it a lot. The little books decorating it are really rather sweet.

I just wish Rumplestiltskin was here. Then everything would be perfect.

All right, hotshot. That makes us even. You come after me like that again, I'm not playing as nice next time.

Okay. So. Quick question.

Has anyone seen Meg in the last few days? I'm used to at least a text or something if she's going to be busy with something for a long time and MIA because of it, and this time there hasn't been a thing. Nothing. Nada. Not really troubling any other time, but considering our current vulnerability, I would rather not take my chances.

So. Yes? No? Maybe? Any takers?

( a clash as Cas knocks some of the armor around in his haste to get out of the library ) This isn't remotely humorous. Where is Dean Winchester? I don't understand the purpose of this device. I have an urgent matter to ---

( doors slamming shut, Castiel getting shoved out onto the concrete and knocking on the door forcefully for several minutes before giving up the ghost on that one. )


Hello? ( a long pause, as Castiel looks around the city center. )


Dean?

Sam?

So I can be hurt, my daughter keeps falling through the furniture, and my husband is the new, albeit temporary, Satan.

That settles it. I'm getting drunk. Anyone want to join me?

Right, so... I'm human now. Which is a thing that happened, apparently. And that's fine. I can deal. But something tells me, from what I'm seeing on the network, that someone else might not be human right now.

So, if you're female - because we're going to assume Asaph isn't an actual idiot and would do this to a male - and if you're feeling an overwhelming sense of violence and general loathing and distaste toward every man in existence, and can now benchpress a Buick... we should probably talk. Just an idea.

Again? Are you kidding me, Uncle?! How many times are you going to make me human before you realize I GET IT NOW?

[ooc: takes place after this]

( Filtered to Lucifer )

( Filtered to Jack Winchester )

So. That was interesting. I would much rather not do it again. Either of it. The dying or the memory wipe. Hear that, Uncle? Please and thank you.

[ Filtered to Dean & Claire Winchester ]
By which I mean, of course, please, don't kill me. It's not like Uncle is going to let me stay dead, and Mother wasn't very keen on the idea when I suggested it to her. So I would rather not have to play yo-yo limbo.

This isn't real.

I did not just get thrown out of a library by armoured suits.

Where am I?

At least it isn't the cage.

Dean?

[ Currently: Castiel is trying to speak to one of the residents of Colligo with little success and you all seem to be coming in on an already begun one-sided conversation. ]

--that the bus system can move to different planets. Where are Dean and Sam Winchester? [ Awkward pause. ] Why do you not answer me? It is a simple question. Where am I? And where are the Winchesters? [ It doesn't get much straight forward than that in his head, right? ] Speak. [ He can do this for hours sadly. ]

Hi, kiddies! We all sitting pretty out there? Not very comfortable, perhaps, but you get what you pay for, so they say.

Soooo. Just out of curiosity, how many of you have absolutely no idea how you got here? Show of hands? Everyone? I'm assuming everyone. It's not like I can actually see you.

Now, let's go with, who here as some sort of major beef with destiny, fate, the powers that be, what have you? Anyone here just sad, pathetic, and normal? If so, let me know. I'll be happy to put you out of your misery. I'm going to err on the side of not likely, though, because there is some ultimate goal to this. I'm sure of it. I just have to figure out how His twisted mind is working at the moment.

Anyways! Carry on!

This

I don't

I can't

What the fu

Hello?

Well fuck that.

Just fuck it. A lot.

And fuck you, Uncle Asaph.

( OOC: Fear not, children. Gabriel has made it so the curse words appear as something less offensive when kids read it. For purposes of children, the role of the word 'fuck' will be played by the word 'banana'. You're welcome. What? He wasn't going to be obvious and use the word 'fudge'. He likes fudge. It's delicious. )

( Gabriel sounds confused and wary )

Michael? Lucifer? Raphael?

( a pause )

This place is very strange...

Brothers? Is this some game? A trick? I do not understand.

2012, huh? Something tells me it's going to go a little differently for me this time than it did the last time around.

Somebody remind me because it's been a while. Do I still just have the one video store, or have I opened the second one yet?

( Filtered to Dean )

[ooc: this is claire, who gave up her ability a few years down the road in a potential colligo future]

You know, it might be nice to stick to one time for a change.

Just saying.

Still, this is kind of a nice vacation, I guess.

Hello, 2012.

Well. Hello again, 2012. It's been a while.

Hello again, 2012. I didn't think I'd be seeing this time again. I'm guessing you missed me something terrible.

Dad? Mom? Meri, are here somewhere?

Let's see. Empty library. Empty suits of armor. A city this size that I've never seen before, in this day and age. If it weren't for the fact that I have things to do and places to be and a hellspawn to get out of me I'd almost be impressed.

Except I'm not. Instead I'm hungry, I'm tired, and I want to know right damn now.

Where the hell am I?

The hell is wrong with you people, lettin' yourself get pushed around? You've got people here, lookin' at you like playthings, jerkin' you around however they see fit, and you're just gonna sit back and take? Well, I ain't, so I'm gonna say this one, more, time.


I ain't lookin' to drag any of you into anything, but, the way I see it, we're all stuck. Ain't nobody leavin' unless the big man upstairs says so. Fine. Those are the rules that ain't gonna get broken. That don't mean you all gotta just sit back and play nice, sufferin' through whatever game he decides he wants to play and just hope it all gets better. That ain't the way it ought to be for anyone, an it's probably half the reason he does it as often as he does. Nobody say's nuthin'. Nobody does nothin'. Well, I ain't a man who's happy just sittin' around, twiddlin' his thumbs, waitin' for somethin' to happen.

I ain't askin', or lookin' for no help from nobody. I ain't tryin' to convince you I'm right. I ain't even gonna try and tell you to do anything but what you've been doin'. What I'm saying is this..I'm not gonna take this layin' down.

I ain't gonna sit here and see people hurtin', losin' their friends, losin' their whole lives. I'm not gonna sit back and just let him tie me to a string and jerk me around. He wants me to do somethin', well, I ain't exactly gonna make it easy for him, and if you all wanna sit back an avoid me, and the issue? Fine. I ain't fixin' to drag you into a place you don't wanna be. That ain't my intent.

You sick and tired of it though and you want a chance to say so? You show up, and we'll get it done.

Downtown. Tomorrow. This is me, callin' both of you out. You wanna sit up on high and play games? Well, maybe you should take a good, hard, look at jus' what it is you're doin' to people and, if you don't show? Well, everybody's gonna see jus' what kinda Gods you really are.

Oh. Well. It's this again, is it? Or will it be this? Still haven't quite gotten the hang of tenses, it seems. I really must work on that but first - and yes, I'm fairly certain it is first, now - where is my thief? Thieves. Two of them. There are two of him, I can tell, yet I can't find him. Them. Tenses! Honestly!

Oh! Wait. Wait. I have it now! I see. Alternate planes of reality, is it? Clever. Very clever. Not very nice though. There's a word, what I'm feeling about all of this. Cross! Yes. That's it. I'm feeling very cross, you know. This is all very, very wrong.

Boooooooooored! Bored. Bored. Bored. Bored. Bored. Bored. Bored. Bored!

[ rather intense whine, like a petulant child who hasn't gotten his way ] Why'd you have to go and take most of my friends? I've only got so many people that actually like me. [ pause ] Not that fear and abhorrence aren't great in the right situations, but this? This whole place? Not one of those situations.

Got that?! And yes, I'm just going to keep on because I know you can hear me, Uncle, and this has to be much more annoying than people replying to that stupid little post that you sent out. [ starts singing Highway to Hell at the top of his lungs ]

You have to be kidding me. It's one thing to not be able to see my dad, or Peter, or Molly. It's another entirely not to be able to see my children.

( Filtered to Loki )