( colligo ¬ get collected ) → network.

My current theory is that we've all had our memories blanked as part of some government experiment. Perhaps, by wiping our memories, they're trying to see how we'll survive without them, and if we'll still thrive as a population, or go mad with trying to remember who we are in the process. This seems the most plausible theory, as the idea of alien abduction seems to be rather far-fetched.

I woke up on the couch in a relatively nice home with a rather attractive woman, who I'm assuming is more than likely my girlfriend. Neither of us are wearing rings, so my guess is that we're not married, but are at a point in our relationship we're both committed to it enough to buy a house together. Of course, I suppose there's always the option that she's related to me, but I doubt this is the case, as there are no signs of us being related, and I do think I'd have some natural intuition if she was.

Yes, I'm aware that I'm more than likely over-analyzing the situation. But I think most would agreee with me when I say that in this case, over-analyzing is better than not coming to any assumptions at all.

You should all know that Mycroft was sent back to his own reality.

I will be taking over his duties at City Hall. Hopefully, everything will continue to run smoothly.

I just thought that everyone should be informed, given his role within the city.

When people tell me that I need to "get out and meet more women", this isn't what I had in mind. Not that Isabela isn't a very...lovely person. Like most people, I just prefer to actually be in a relationship with someone for a good amount of time before even considering marriage.

Interesting.

[picked up monologing]

Mrrrowww, even without the flying rodent here for a little cat-and-mouse, this night's really the cat's meow. This tiger's eye tiger sculpture is purrrrfect. [laughter]


[OOC: Holy cheesy puns, Batman!]

I've been thinking. Aside from you dying during that nasty business that was an alien invasion, I actually like it here. It's not the same as back home, but I'm also dead back home. So there's that.

In all seriousness, I am happy for you that you found someone, even if it being another man was a little strange at first. ...Not that I have anything against you and Canton. I like Canton. He's a good man, and that's what you need.

I'm still a little unsure how I feel about Loki, even if he's apparently changed. He killed me, after all. Even though I was taking a stand against him, and wouldn't change anything, I still can't help but just feel...uneasy around him.

This place is very strange. I don't understand how it is I am incapable of remembering it when I am not here, yet am instantly reminded of it upon my return.

It would also appear the city had suffered significant damage since I was last here. Is there currently a threat of which I should be aware or has it been dealt with accordingly?

This wasn't a bad way to pass time. Are these things normal around here?
( Phil's answers )

So...that was a thing that happened.

( River )
Sorry about that.

( Phil )
So...I think maybe I owe you an apology. And a drink.

Also, I hope you know you cockblocked me. I was going to have awesome resurrection sex, and then Canton had to go and make me worried about you.

( Natasha )
Ty v poryadke?

( Bruce )
You were fun company in the boring as fuck death room, Freckles.

( Avengers )
So...I guess I should apologize for River going off on you all.

To clear some things up, no I don't think I'm not really part of the team, no I don't think you guys should have backed me up, and it's nobody's fault that I had a slight case of death. Seriously, you guys couldn't have changed what happened. So, let's just hang out and be awesome.

Well that was something.

[Fail!Filter to Kitty]
Right. So. On a scale of one to ten with how mad you are at me for getting myself killed... think I could get some pants?

[There's the sound of buttons being pressed, and Phil definitely sounds like he's been drinking. His words are a bit slurred, and he doesn't have his usual calm, collected, even tone. It's very clear he's upset.]

...Pepper? Pepper?

[A pause, and a slightly frustrated sigh.]

I know...I know it's late..but I need to talk to someone. Can't talk to anyone else, really. Since my only other friend is dead.

[Another pause.]

Wait. There is Tasha. But she's...well, Tasha.

[He pauses again, and he makes a sound as he clears his throat.]

Clint's dead, Pepper. Clint's dead, and I should've been there. I should've been backing him up. I should've known he'd need my help. But I didn't. And now, my friend is dead.

[He pauses again, and he can be heard shuffling around. A couple of empty bottles fall to the floor, but he doesn't seem to notice.]

I sound so stupid. I just...need a friend. And you're not dead. At least, I hope not.

[OOC: While this is an "accidental" voice post, Phil did not actually intend to voice post. He currently thinks he called Pepper, as he pressed a wrong button. Like I stated, he's been drinking.]

[Filtered to Canton]
We have a bit of a situation. I'm I don't normally apologise, but

I'm sorry, Canton. I really, truly am.

[Filtered to the Avengers - and Phil Coulson]
If you all are quite finished sitting on your bloody hands and not doing a singular damn thing to aid others in this particular battle, I've a bit of news for you.

Not that I think any of you deserve it, mind. Heroes. Honestly. You have the gall to call yourselves such? What have any of you done, since this began?

Well. I'll tell you what your supposed comrade did. Clint Barton joined me in attempting to stop the Daleks from overtaking the bulk of this city and slaughtering everyone they encountered in the process. And now, he's dead.

So I hope you're all bloody well happy with yourselves. A good man is dead while the rest of you continue to sit high in your ridiculous looking tower and aren't doing a damn thing to help anyone else. Heroes indeed. You all are embarrassments, that's what you are.

And so help me, if any of you dare to ask for his remains, I will shoot you where you stand. And don't think this isn't going to affect you either, Captain Rogers. I know precisely how to take you out as well. Don't believe me? Just try me, right now. I bloody well dare you.

[Filtered to the Eleventh Doctor]
There you have it, sweetie. An entire battalion of Daleks have been dealt with, as have several hundred Cybermen and a fair number of Silents as well.

I'm going drinking. Don't wait up.

[ooc: takes place a few hours after this]

All right, everyone!

Do not panic. Or...I suppose you could panic if you want. It's not as if I could stop you. But really, it won't help. Probably. I guess it might. But that's highly unlikely, so I strongly suggest not panicking.

There are several things here that most likely want us all dead, but that's just Christmas for you. Admittedly, Christmas has never been quite this bad, but you lot deal with this sort of thing all the time. I'm sure it will be fine.

A bit of advice.

There are Silents. You won't remember them if you look away, so if you see one, find a way to remind yourself. Tally marks work. Recording notes to yourself. That sort of thing.

The statues are very dangerous. Don't take your eyes off of them. Don't blink. If you blink, you're dead.

The Daleks and the Cybermen are the same if you're looking at them or not, but that doesn't mean they're not just as bad. Be very careful and do not get shot. Or converted. Those are both bad things.

We will get through this. I know we will. Good luck and keep safe. And merry Christmas.

( Filtered to River Song )
And you said I didn't get you anything good for Christmas.

Apparently, dying isn't what it used to be anymore.

That post on the network was really helpful. It makes this whole being brought back to life on another planet experience easier. And I can focus on more important things.

I'll introduce myself. My name is Special Agent Phil Coulson, of SHIELD. I'm apparently going to be staying here awhile, so I might as well find a job. Is there any sort of government office, here?

Was anyone else dead before this?

So, question time.

1) Did anyone else lose limbs in this fun little experiment? Just wondering. Really not sure if this is whoever got us all here, or Stark got a little science happy.

2) What the actual fuck? Maybe that should have come first, but I'm kind of stuck on the I HAVE A FUCKING ROBOT HAND thing.

3) If you see that guy that looks like Snape with a leather fetish, keep away from him. He's crazy and evil and not good.

4) Who else is in the vents? I keep hearing beeping.

5) At least I have my arrows.

That's all.

( the little boy's voice sounds nervous )

Momma? ( hesitantly ) Barney?

( a pause )

Where am I? I'm up high and I don't know how to get down and...and...I don't know how I got here...

( another pause )

Hello? Momma? Barney? ( very hesitantly ) Dad?

Is anyone there?

Drinks at my place.

Tonight.

Come if you want.

And you're old enough to.

Hey. Coulson. You can see this? C'mon. Everyone else can see their room mates again, tell me you can see this..

We should go out for a drink. Maybe bring your friend Clint, invite Tony, or something. Yeah?

Please tell me you can see this, 'cause I really think I'm starting to lose my mind.

I sincerely apologize to all of the people I was forced to kiss this week. There was several of you, and it wasn't my intention to do so at all.

I'm pretty sure Parker's just going to keep poking me with a stick until I fall off these rafters or I fill this thing out.

( Clint's answers )

The those knights obviously don't know me very well, or they'd know that locking me up in prison wasn't a very good idea.

At least, not locking me up in a prison I could break myself out of that easily. I mean, really. There at least should have been some challenge in it. Also...who puts a jail in the basement of a library?

Now that I'm out of library jail, anyone want to tell me what the hell is going on here?

This isn't where I was assigned.