( colligo ¬ get collected ) → network.

I love these things.

( Steph's answers )

So, I robbed a bank with Spider-Man.

That's a thing that happened.

I am so never living that one down.

I need Jello. All the Jello.

Did...uh...anyone else wake up and get kicked out of a library? [ There's a slight pause as he avoids getting bumped by someone on the sidewalk. Why? Cos he has no idea what the Hell is going on...or who he is for that matter. ] Also...feeling like your brain got slurped up by a crazy straw because I got that nagging feel I left the stove on and forgot my name. And where I came from...or anything resembling a personal history.

Well the fact that I'm not a drooling vegetable is always a good sign, right?

I think I might be either a) a masked vigilante or b) a masked bandit though.

I'm not even sure that was even a punishment, Asaph. Except maybe the kid. So it seems like I'm back and Isabel isn't here so that means I'm without work. Anyone willing to hire a mildly attractive man who's pretty handy with just about anything he can get his hands on? [ A pause. ] That can be taken anyway you guys want to take it.

[ He chuckles a little. ] But I'm not doing any strip teases.


[ filtered to: stephanie brown ]

Let me take you out for some drinks. [ There's a slight pause. ] Then we can go kick some bad guys asses. I'm pretty sure petty criminals never sleep.

[ There’s a bit of an awkward silence for the longest time since Aaron is just simply sitting up in the bed he woke up in next to the person he woke up, there’s a little shuffling around but mostly it’s just him breathing and sort of dazed. ]

Well, well...this is a pleasant surprise. Steph? Hey, Stephhhhhhh...rise 'n shine.

( There’s some mumbling as Steph shifts in the bed, and a low, displeased noise, before she finally speaks, sounding half-asleep and not especially coherent )

Mrrph...go 'way. Too early for your...sciencing or whatever... ( a pause ) Five...hundred more minutes, 'kay?

[ Aaron laughs a bit and lays down in bed, propping his head on his hand as he watches her for a moment before reaching over and slightly patting her cheek. ]

I’m not the sciencing type, Steph. [ Another pause and she’s still not moving before he reaches over and ruffles her hair a bit. ] Steph, Jesus Christ get up you lazy ass.

( There's a confused noise, then Steph seems to realize that she’s not in bed with Sherlock, and she sits up with a startled sound that turns into a surprised gasp )

You...are so not Sherlock. This is such a step up. You have no idea. ( pause ) Wait...you’re not Clint...you’re not nearly sleeveless enough...but you know me...so...( a pause ) OH MY GOD...did you finally settle your tragic divorce from Barbie, Ken doll?

[ Aaron’s always a step up from Sherlock. (Sorry Sherlock). Aaron nearly rolls off the bed with a loud laugh. ]

Last time I checked I wasn’t Sherlock...might’ve had a cover with the name Sherlock once. But that’s because I was bored. [ He laughs. ] Barbie was a bitch. She took everything, all I got to keep was my clothes. [ A pause. ] So...did you club me over the head and bring me to your bed? You could’ve just asked Steph.

( Steph laughs, clearly more awake now and delighted with the new bed partner. Sorry, Sherlock, but she's really happy not to have to worry about severed heads in the fridge and stuff. Also, Aaron’s prettier. When she speaks, it's with mock indignation )

That bitch. ( a laugh ) Well, she may have gotten the car and the dreamhouse, but at least you got to keep your dignity...and your collection of various pairs of brightly colored boardshorts. ( a pause ) Though...now that I think about it, those might be mutually exclusive... ( another pause ) Actually, Asaph brought you back...you know...because reasons. And you showed up in the middle of a thing that was happening. ( another pause as she holds up her hand to show off the ring ) Congratulations, we're fake married.

[ Aaron is way prettier than Sherlock, thank you very much. He stifles another laugh against the palm of his hand because this way too amusing even for him. ] We don’t talk about the collection of brightly colored boardshorts. I’m not particularly proud of them. They’re...flowery. Most of them are pink I think.

[ A pause. ] I woke up in the middle of a thing that...fake marries people? Are we fake dog owners too? Do we have fake hedges?

( more under cut )

Who the hell has my daughter?!

I actually love these things. They're fun.
( Jo's answers )

Ooo! I love these. Even if this one does feel kind of like the worst consolation prize ever.

"So, the city's kind of wrecked, and some people died, but here! Have some questions."

( Steph's answers )

I never thought I'd say that a Gotham Christmas would be less crazy. We're okay, by the way. Obviously I kept my kid out of that. My mom would roll in her grave if I got my daughter scared of angels. And the cats, too. A lot of cats. Guess who got a new place for Christmas, which happens to include a cat shelter? Just in time, really, since the apartment was getting way too full.

So yeah, if any of you guys happen to be veterinarians or know a good local one, I've got a lot of spaying, neutering, and vaccinating ahead of me. And if I ever want to get any sleep, I could use a hand with taking care of the cats or babysitting Helena. I'll hire you if you need the work and you're good at it.

I don't suppose shouting 'Avengers Assemble' will work here? Thought as much. Now what are Weeping Angels and where do I need to shoot them?

Well that sucked a whole heaping lot.

[Loud hiphop music and people shouting over it can be heard; Raven - the only one whose voice is easily distinguishable - sighs heavily. There's the banging of a door and the rest of the noises become muffled. When Raven speaks, she's clearly muttering to herself.]

Well, that was about as much fun as a trip to the dentist. [a pause; there's the distinct sound of the door banging once more - with the noises from the club becoming loud then muffled once again; Raven doesn't seem to notice]

Okay, maybe a little more fun than the dentist, but still not as [a pause] Uh. Hi there. Something I can help you with? [there's a muffled voice, low and angry-sounding; the words are too garbled to make out but it's obvious from Raven's snort of derision a heartbeat later that she clearly doesn't give a damn what they're saying]

Right. Because it's my fault that your guy noticed m- [there's a loud slap and a clatter as the PDA falls to the ground - Raven's voice becomes a bit distant-sounding]

You slapped me! Who just walks up to someone and slaps them? That's seriously rude! [there's the sound of someone punching someone else; Raven's grunts softly and mutters to herself] Okay, ouch. Note to self. Figure out how to punch someone without use of your- [she trails off at the telltale sound of a gun being cocked]

A gun.

[a pause; her tone is disbelieving]

You're going to shoot me over a guy? A guy that noticed me? Are you actually nuts? We danced. Seriously. I even turned down his number. And you don't just-

[there's a loud bang and a gasp of pain; the thud of a body hitting the ground is coupled with the sound of someone in high heels running away; for a moment, there's nothing else, then a sharp intake of breath that's very wheezy and filled with pain]

Sonofa- [a couple of seconds of coughing follow then another, softer thud; then, there's nothing but silence save for the distant sound of music playing and cars driving past]

I've never been more appreciative for the fact that the labs are soundproofed. Not that it's anything new for me, but I've been in my lab since yesterday, because it's been the only way to control this new ability. Apparently I have developed telepathy and without knowing how to control it I unwittingly read the minds of just about everyone here at the mansion. It was brief and I would never do that if I could control it of course. </s>I'll admit though, this is preferable to having feet like a monkey. Even if I do sort of miss being able to hang upside down.</s> I should have asked sooner, but I was distracted, trying to figure out how to control this on my own, but please let me know if you've suddenly developed....unusually large feet.

[Filtered to Xavier Mansion]
I didn't ask earlier if everyone was alright, considering I accidently read everyone's minds and already knew the answer. It seems that with the exception of Damian and Stephanie, the rest of you are all completely human, correct?

No need to be alarmed, but I sort of just broke the fridge door. Okay, so maybe there is a need to be alarmed. I know I've always been stronger than someone my age, but I've never been strong enough to pull the fridge door off.

I can't be here right now. I need to go back. There are things happening back home. Important things. I need to be there, not here. I need to check on the others and I need to go back home to do that because that's the only way I can check on them since they aren't here. So I need to go back.

Oh! And there's zombies here now. There aren't supposed to be zombies. Or mummies, either. That's unnatural.

Well, that was horribly unsettling. Next time, let it just be a simple invasion. We're better equipped to deal with something like that.

[ Selina ]
How are you and Helena managing?

[ Steph ]
That was not fun. At all. Being that angry and suspicious all the time is exhausting.

[ Charles ]
I have never been more glad to not think like myself before.

So, is everyone back to themselves? Or have we just had a mini-wave of people turning back early?

Hey. Selina. I have a baby I need to return to you. You know, if you want.

I'm bored. And I want to do something. Ideas?

( Aaron )
So, your name is Ken? That's a weird nickname for Aaron.

[ There's some shuffling going around in the background because...well, Aaron just finished avoiding the library guards for a little more than a couple hours before they grabbed a hold of him...the struggling and sound of Aaron hitting the guard statues was enough to turn on his PDA before he was so gracefully brought into the city. ]

Either the Philippines have gotten a new police force that gives out free PDAs or...well, I'm not even sure what's going on at this point. [ Aaron's pretty much talking at himself, he's trying to catalogue the sequence of events that took place before showing up in the library. The dull pain in his leg was a reminder that it wasn't a dream. ] Does anyone know what's going on here or do I have to guess?

Because nothing I'm coming up with makes sense. And I'm pretty sure Hell wouldn't look like this. [ He'd bring up Marta but he'd rather keep her off the radar just in case this was all a ruse to give up her location. An extremely elaborate ruse. ]

[in the background, music can be heard playing softly before suddenly being interrupted by an alarmed shriek from a monkey followed by some shuffling about, a gasp, then a resounding thud coupled with a grunt before a female voice begins speaking]

Ow. That hurt. Stupid gravity.

[sounds of someone standing back up before sucking in a sharp breath]

O-kay. That's... you're a monkey. Why are you a monkey? Why are you in my room?!

[footsteps, muffled against the carpet, are heard going away from the pda, then back toward it]

Right. There's a monkey. In my room. I have a monkey in my room. Someone gave me a monkey and- [everything suddenly goes silent before the girl groans softly]

Charles. What did you do this time? Right. Phone. I need to- [an abrupt pause then, loudly]

WHO STOLE ALL MY RECORDS?!?!?

[ooc: raven xavier, age thirteen, who purposefully makes herself look a bit older because, uh, she's a teenage girl who can. enjoy!]

So, I kind of stole a baby.

Just so everyone's aware.

Well...okay, stole isn't the right word. I procured her, from Selina, who's totally in no shape to deal with a baby right now.

Who wants Jello?

[voice is sleepy, confused]

What the hell? Where the hell is this? Ohh, bastard, did you drug me? I'll flay you... if you're here...

[sounds of rummaging and furniture thumping, someone searching a room]

Robert's gone. Somehow I knew it was too good to actually last. Clearly the Collector really does want me to be some old crazy, cat lady.

I give up on relationships. They hurt too much.

I didn't mean I thought Kitty was trying to stop me. I let it get to me, whatever is happening to everyone, it got to me. I didn't know what I was doing, and she was trying to stop me.

I thought she was someone else. I didn't mean hurt her. I swear, I didn't.

Raven. Steph. Your monkey took my Boostex. I want it back. It's mine. Not his. He needs to come out of the vent and give me back my Boostex because it's mine, not his, and he can't just take it because it's mine.

Molly, and Old Lace, are gone. I went by her room to see if she wanted to go into town with me and found it empty.

Sometimes I really hate this place.

Hello, Colligo. I'm Selina. I take it from my reading and listening that I'll be stuck here awhile, until I'm not. I'm furious, but right now I want information more than I want to lash out at complete strangers who're just as screwed over as I am. Just give me a reason...

I'm supposed to be going to an assigned apartment, but that really isn't my style. At all. I'll find my own way, thanks. I'll take it for now until I find what I want. Can anyone recommend what to check out? I've done some looking around already, but I don't know enough yet about anything's reputation. Tell me about the neighborhoods here, where people aim to go and where they avoid.

My first priority, though-- is there an animal rescue anywhere? Where would someone look for cats in need of homes?

I'm feeling itchy from prolonged seriousness. I'm pretty sure it's an allergic reaction.

And I may or may not be making ALL THE JELLO as a way of apologizing.

Seriously, guys, I'm pretty sure I could make a lifesize statue of the god of abs with this much Jello. Or Steve. If...you know...I was into Jello sculpting.

I've done quite a lot of thinking recently about my attempt to reverse my mutation and I have come to the conclusion that I wasn't the least bit at fault for the ultimate result. I've rewritten the formula that I used and the science was sound, which means there was a miscalculation; otherwise it would have worked perfectly and I would have become normal as opposed to transforming into a great, blue animal.

ATTENTION PEOPLE OF COLLIGO!

It is with great pleasure, and virtually no research on the matter because we are awesome like that, that Steph and I would like to introduce you to our mascot/sidekick/best pet ever.



His name is Abu, he likes baths, and if any of you try to claim he's not adorable I will kick you in the face. Or scowl. Whichever is easier.

( There’s the sound of a door opening and a soft, sort of surprised sound. After a moment, Steve speaks, his voice a little uneasy. Clearly he’s out of his element. Still, he’s speaking loud enough that he’s obviously talking to someone outside the room. )

Hello? Raven? I know you said to just come in but... ( a pause ) Wow...this place is...just...wow. You were kinda underselling it when you said it was just a small place with a few rooms... ( another pause, this one slightly awkward ) This is the right place, right? I’d hate to think I just walked into the wrong house.

(There's a quiet snort of amusement before Raven speaks up, her footsteps sounding over his PDA a few seconds before she actually appears in the room.)

You don't know how tempted I was to pretend to be some old lady who was ticked you were walking into her house just now. (a pause; clearly she's grinning) Fortunately for you, I decided to be nice just this once.

(There's another pause.)

And yes. I'll freely admit I was underselling the place a bit. But honestly. If you've seen one mansion, blah blah blah. You know how it goes. (a pause) Or maybe you don't. I keep forgetting you're even more time displaced than I am, in a lot of ways. Huh. Not used to someone having it worse than me. That's going to take some getting used to.

(Another pause, this time she draws in a big breath before continuing.)

Anyway. So. Welcome and all that fun stuff. I'm Raven. Hi there.

( Steve’s quiet for a long moment, just taking in everything she’s said. When he finally speaks, he sounds more at ease. )

Well...I have to say, I’m really glad you decided against doing that. I’m not exactly sure how I’d have reacted to that. So...it’s good that you were nice. Not...that I thought you wouldn’t be.

( an amused chuckle )

Can’t really say I know how it goes. Mansions are more Tony’s thing. Don’t really have ‘em in Brooklyn. It’s nice though...I guess...if you like big houses with lots of rooms and stuff. ( a pause ) Sorry. Can you tell I’m a little out of my element here?

( another pause, then very earnestly )

It’s nice to meet you, Raven. In person, that is. I’m Steve.

(Raven laughs slightly.)

Yeah, I gathered you were Steve. What with you showing up, asking for me by name, and being (a pause) actually, 'built' really isn't doing you justice. Because really. You are definitely more than built. You're about up there with one of those carved statues of a perfect physique that I had to study when I was forced to take art class in boarding school.

(another pause)

Seriously. Did you know you're about a twenty-five million on a scale of one to ten of physical hotness? Even I can't swear I could make abs that look like yours and that is definitely saying something.

( It’s quiet for a long moment. Steve tries to say something, but mostly just stammers, then clears his throat and tries again. )

I...um...thank you, ma’am. I’m not all that sure I agree with your opinion, but it’s nice of you to say that...even if I’m pretty sure you’re exaggerating. A lot. But I wouldn’t try looking like me if I were you. I mean...you’re really pretty just the way you are.

(Raven's tone is no small amount of amused as she responds.)

First of all, it's Raven. Not ma'am. And I'm not exaggerating. You're really very pretty, for a guy.

(a pause)

And secondly, thanks, for the comment about me. Although... (another pause) This isn't actually the way I am. This is just the way I commonly choose to look.

(There's yet another pause, then the telltale sound of Raven shifting physical forms.)

This is how I naturally look. (For all of the bravado in her tone, there's still a touch of wariness despite her attempt to sound casual.) Not exactly as pretty as the blonde hair, blue eyed look, I know. But still me, just the same.

( Steve sounds slightly less flustered, but not by much. )

All right. Raven. I’ll keep that in mind. I’m still not sure I agree on the pretty thing, but I guess we can agree to disagree on that.

( There’s a pause when Raven shifts into her natural form. When Steve does speak, he sounds absolutely sincere. )

You’re very patriotic. And I can’t imagine a single reason why you wouldn’t want to look like that all the time. I think it’s pretty swell. Whoever got you thinking you weren’t pretty must’ve been a real idiot.

(Raven is silent for a long moment. When she speaks, she's clearly smiling.)

Okay. You, I like. You can stay. In fact, I vote we keep you. And as my vote is the one that counts, (a pause) and Steph's too, since she counts but will still vote my way as well anyway because she's awesome like that, you're staying. Maybe not permanently, of course, because I'm sure you have a life and a roommate and (a pause) and now I'm gushing. The point is, good answer. Let's find you some Jello to try.

(another pause)

Oh! And I made star-shaped red, white, and blue Jello for you. I figured it was fitting. But there's lots of others you can try too. (yet another pause) In fact, I insist you try them all. Mostly because I'm pretty sure my brother will have a stroke if he sees how much Jello I made. And am I talking a lot? Because I do that, sometimes. I'll stop talking now. This way to the kitchen!

(another pause, this time for a half of a second or so)

And you really are pretty for a man, Steve. You should just accept that and move on because I'm not dropping it until you agree with me. I'm a little stubborn that way.

( Steve gets flustered again, stumbling over his words as he tries to respond. )

Stay? I...uh...I mean that’s nice of you, but I do have a place of my own, and I’m pretty sure it’d be rude to just leave without saying anything...not to mention I’m not sure I ought to go moving somewhere new and... ( a pause ) Let’s just start with Jello and work up to you kidnapping me and keeping me locked up here so I can compliment you.

( a pause then a laugh )

That actually sounds pretty good. I guess if it’ll keep you out of trouble with your brother, I can help get rid of the Jello. From what you’ve told me, it sounds pretty good. And, anyway, my metabolism is kind of crazy. ( sounding kind of embarrassed ) I’m actually kind of starving right now.

( another short pause )

Well...thank you. ( a brief pause ) Oh...hey. Would you mind if I...um...drew you some time? ( another pause ) I just mean...I like drawing. And you look so unique...you don’t have to say yes. I just...I thought it could be nice.

(Raven pauses for a moment, as though considering his question. Her tone is a bit dry when she replies.)

You know, that’s the second time in fairly recent memory for me that a guy has asked me for something that’s definitely not ordinary. Though I’m guessing that drawing me won’t involve needles? At least, I hope not. Otherwise, your idea of drawing and my idea of drawing are a whole lot different. (a pause; her tone turns slightly teasing) That’s a yes, by the way. I don’t mind if you draw me sometime. I’m actually a little flattered. (another pause) And also relieved that you have an appetite because seriously. Half the fridge is stocked with Jello right now and I kinda want to avoid a lecture on wasting my free time making tasty, jiggly desserts if I can help it.

(There’s the sound of a door opening.)

And here’s the kitchen. Which is (a pause) surprisingly empty, for once. I swear, all the rooms in this house and most of us seem to spend our free time in here. There’s probably something to be said about that. (a cabinet door swings open)

Oh! Right. Go ahead and have a seat wherever. Personally I prefer the counter but that’s mostly because it makes this little vein stick out on the side of my brother’s head whenever I do it. But yeah. Have a seat and I’ll grab round one of the second largest Jello feast in the school’s history.

( another laugh, this one slightly startled. )

No. No. Definitely no needles. Just some charcoal. Maybe some pastels. It seems a shame to draw you in black and white when your colors are so vivid. ( a pause, then shyly ) I missed it...during the war. I know I'm a soldier...but I was studying art, before the war. Life just...kind of got in the way. A lot of things got in the way. And now it's seventy years later and...I don't know. It would be nice to have something familiar. That doesn't change.

( a pause as he listens to her talking about the kitchen and Jello )

I don't think me sitting on the counter would be a good idea. ( another pause ) Wait...that's the second largest Jello feast?

In summary...you know...before I show my answers, we need a monkey companion.

( monkey monkey monkey )

[ there is the sound of thunder rumbling violently, along with the brief trickle of static moving in and out, the words "brother's" and "doing" teetering within hearing range. ] COWARDS! [ an unintelligible crash and a hasty snarl makes itself known ] YOU WILL RETURN BEFORE ME WITH THE ANSWERS OF WHICH I SEEK!

[ then, strong and defined through the haze of white noise, one word is heard ]

LOKI!

These questions were weird.

( And now I want a monkey. )

I'm gonna kill that son of a bitch and if Asaph brings him back I'll kill him again!!

That was decidedly unpleasant. Dr. Song, I do hope you're back to yourself now.

No, Asaph. No. I don't want to revisit my childhood again, understand? And I'm 99.9% sure that no one else around here wants me to revisit my childhood either. Besides, then the whole me and Steph thing gets weird again.

Hey Jason, so when's confession? Cause I have to confess that the thought of you as a priest made me laugh so hard that my ribs hurt.

You know you've been time traveling when you open your closet and your clothes are a lot smaller than they're supposed to be.

Hello again, 2012.

Any time this place wants to stop with the back and forth already, that would be great. Really. It's starting to make me a little dizzy.

I suppose I should get this over with.

This place certainly is interesting, I'll give it that much. A bit confusing but I'm sure I can muddle through.

So, for the record, I'm Raven. I'm apparently going to be taking over the life of my younger self for a while. I'd apologize for that but I'm the victim, so that isn't going to happen. Instead I'll just say, if you'd rather not associate with me until I'm back as I'm meant to be, I'll understand.

So I was thinking this morning, while making waffles.

And no, before you ask, the waffles didn't burn. Waffles are serious business and I would never burn them.

I've decided that if I could be any color, I'd be blue. Specifically your shade of blue. Because it's a really great shade.

Or purple. Which do you think would go better with blonde?

This is what I think about. Yeah, I don't know either.

So, how are things going with Hank? My offer to kick him in the throat if he upsets you still stands. Best friend prerogative. Plus my ninja skills totally enable throat-kicking.

Also, want to go practice in the Danger Room? Older Erik has this bad habit of making me want to punch things when he says words.

Thank you, and I hope you've enjoyed your daily dose of stream of consciousness from Steph.

Interesting. No illusionist would take the time to craft such an extensive and contradictory environment.

Also, anyone who happens to be in the Xavier School at the moment, I think I might have broken Charles, if you wish to come try and fix him.

STEPH! STEPH! GET OUT OF THE DANGER ROOM RIGHT. NOW. WE NEED TO TALK.

You will not believe who I just saw kissing and being all couple-y. Well, okay, you will believe it since you called it a long time ago, but still. It's finally happened!

And for the record, just because they're finally together does not mean I'm going to start calling Charles 'mom' and Erik 'dad'. You have fun with that but no thanks.

NOW GET OUT OF THE DANGER ROOM ALREADY! THIS CALLS FOR CELEBRATORY JELLO!

[ooc: yes, this is "accidentally" mass!posted to everyone. so, while the entire city will receive this, she's going to totally claim it was meant for stephanie only. mostly because raven is a bratty little sister who lives to embarrass her brother. >.>]

To whoever thought using those poorly constructed bits of scrap metal as a defence system was a good idea, you can pick up what's left of them on the steps of that library where I woke.

Now. Would someone mind telling me where in the kriff I am? The alignment of stars overhead doesn't look even the least bit familiar.

Now, this is much better. No offense meant to either you or your companions, Parker, but I have to say, I'm quite happy to be back where I'm supposed to be.

Steph, you back to normal, too? Raven, Charles, nothing else has gone odd yet, yes?

What- [ prolonged confusion in the tone before that's shock ] What the- Why are you naked? Why am I naked? What the hell? WHY ARE THERE TWO OF YOU?

Charles? Where the hell am I? How much did I drink? WHY DO I SOUND LIKE I HAVE A COLD?

Raven!

Code...we don't even have a code for this! That's how serious this is.

I sparkle, Raven. I freaking sparkle! If I go out in the sun, I look like I've been glitterbombed!

Also I kind of want to eat people. That's bad, right?

Also, I woke up with the guy who looks like Cedric Diggory from the Harry Potter movies. Help.

Me: *walking down the street*
Two (local) Girls: *pass by*
Girl #1: *clearly mid-conversation* So... what's the problem?
Girl #2: I feel like I'm wearing the Justice League.

I've never been so tempted in my life to walk up to a complete stranger and ask for context.

So, I got a pony. Mostly because my best friend is both awesome and possibly insane.

Yes. That's right. A real pony. My BFF > Your BFF.

Her name is Princess Scootaloo Sparklehooves Batpony. No, this is not up for debate. Just accept the awesome of her name.

Raven is the best. That is all.

Since I have been threatened with irritation until I get these up, here they are. Raven. Steph. You can stop bugging me now. Please.

( Erik's answers )

( No preamble, just a bunch of boring stuff )