( colligo ¬ get collected ) → network.

I know they say getting cold feet right before the wedding is normal..

Well, my feet are toasty and warm.

I'm just more worried about tripping over them tomorrow. Thank goodness, they can't tie themselves together like my shoes did a few weeks ago

I know Edward said he'd be there to catch me if I tripped, but I really don't want to be a klutz on my big day.

Of course, that's not the only thing I'm worried about but.. we won't go there

Good evening,

My name is Edward Cullen. I'm a vampire and I have a somewhat strange question for you that I hope you will be able to answer.

My fianacé, Bella, is human and we plan to become intimate once we are married. However, we wish to discuss forms of contraception with you. Bella would like to take the birth control pill if it is available here in Colligo and I would like to use condoms. My concern is that I do not think that condoms will work as they will likely break. I was hoping that you would have an alternate solution or other suggestions.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Edward.

So...

I tried to head to class, but when I opened the door to leave the hallway a huge boulder started chasing after me. Somehow I managed to stumble against the elevator doors just in time... well until they opened and I fell into the shaft. Luckily my foot got tangled in the rope, but now Edward has deemed me a walking hazard and will not allow me to leave my bedroom.

I'm not even allowed to go into the bathroom unless he checks it first. Who knew there would be poisonous darts shooting out of the medicine cabinet when I was just trying to retrieve my toothbrush. And the whirlpool tub... well, let's just say it lives up to its name now.

I'm glad Edward and I made up, but this place is NOT safe for someone as clumsy as me.

What the hell is going on?

My calculus book bit me after I dropped it!

I didn't mean to, but my shoes tripped me when they tied themselves together for fear of being separated. As if I wasn't clumsy enough on my own

And now, my PDA is stalking me. I've tried throwing it away, breaking it, dropping it in water and now it's saying if it can't have me no one else can!

Why do I get all the weird ones?

As if things weren't tense enough between Edward and I because of the whole Jacob thing...

But now this is just ridiculous!

We went to try and find something to eat and the next thing I know, Edward is kissing someone else?!?!

I guess I really shouldn't talk, since I also kissed someone at midnight. But I can't help but wonder if Edward truly has a thing for blondes... since the girl he kissed looks so much like Rosalie and of course, is a vampire.

I know, I know.. I'm such a hypocrit. But I can't help but wonder why Edward would ever want to be with silly, clumsy human me?