( colligo ¬ get collected ) → network.

Well. While certainly interesting, this definitely isn't Peru.

Would someone mind explaining to me where it is that I am and how I came to be here? I suppose I could always peruse the entire message board but anything to inform me faster than the time it would take me to do that would be greatly appreciated.

[There's a bit of shuffling about. River's voice is low and furious-sounding.]

You have to be bloody well kidding me. How did he possibly manage to... [she sighs and her tone shifts to more annoyed with a touch of amusement] And the library, to boot. Fitting. Clever, too. Not quite clever enough, of course, but then, well, this one doesn't know me the way I know him.

[the sound of quickly moving footsteps and a door opening]

Right then. Let's see. If I'm in the library, that's a left turn, two rights, another left, and - if I'm very lucky and he hasn't gone about tinkering with the poor dear's programming again - the control room.

[some more footsteps then, in a mutter]

Oh, the things I do for this man. Try to keep him from sacrificing himself and destroying the whole bloody universe in the process, and this is the thanks I get! Honestly, sometimes I wonder why I even bother.

[ooc: introducing river song, mere moments before she strapped herself in for her death in 'forest of the dead'.]

[ a vaguely amused noise ] Well, now. This isn't where I figured I would end up. One would think Rassilon himself would have better temporal aim. Now...where is this?

Son of a Bitch. Ok where the hell am I. This looks like some backwards colony planet. What's going on here?

( Filtered to Scoobies )