( colligo ¬ get collected ) → network.

Well, at least I have a change of clothes this time. Definitely better than the first time I woke up in the morgue. Not that that's saying much. Also, no need to investigate what happened to me, in case anyone was going to do that. Mostly because it's me and no one should be surprised I wound up here when I had no idea who I was.

Dean, baby, come pick me up? I'd really like to come home now and not think you're some sketchy old guy running some religious cult. That would be awesome.

Lucifer, if you'd bring Meri home, I'd appreciate it. And no, I don't care if she wants to live with you. She doesn't get a vote. Thanks!

That was certainly... interesting. I can't say I am in any hurry for a repeat performance, however.

Gabe, we have a bit of a situation.

So, I robbed a bank with Spider-Man.

That's a thing that happened.

I am so never living that one down.

I need Jello. All the Jello.

My mom is going to kill me

So, let me make sure I have this all straight.

• I've been kidnapped
• I've been kidnapped to another planet, possibly in another reality
• I can't go home
• All you people apparently just got your memories back because something caused mass amnesia
• My boyfriend robbed a bank during the aforementioned mass-amnesia with a blonde girl

Is that about right?

okay, seriously?

what the FUCK was that? does this happen often here? I mean, can this place REALLY just make us fucking forget who the hell we are???

This is really an interesting place you all have here. Funny how I don't feel as though I had a psychotic break.

If that could never happen again, that would be awesome.

Now, that was a situation that I will remember for a long time to come even if I feel like I'll be paying for it just as long. But every bruise will be a sweet, sweet reminder.

You're welcome to come over whenever you want, Cordelia. I don't mind the post happy ending violence. Prefer it, actually.

I have no idea where I got the name Jordan from. But clearly I need to pick a better name for myself the next time that this happens, though I hope that this doesn't happen for a long time. I want to thank the people that I met for letting me stay with them, I apologize if I forgot your name.

Also, I remember faces, so if you haven't stopped in for your free slice of pie your more than welcome to a slice. And this week, all pies are half off.

Now, I could use a drink or two. Anyone want to join me?

Okay, so many things were wrong with that. SO MANY THINGS.

Cordy, I'm sorry I said you were a hooker with daddy issues. And I'm really sorry you spent two weeks thinking you were Peter's girlfriend.

Peter, let's never talk about that again. Ever. Except the part where you named yourself after Chris Argent. That was hilarious.

Katie, thank you for not showing any interest in me, because if we'd hooked up while we were all amnesia-y, Peter would think he was right. And he's never right.

Danny, I can't believe you called yourself Jackson. Seriously. Nobody wants to be Jackson. I should probably ask about the whole asking me out thing, but I don't really want to get rejected, so I'm going to pretend it never happened.

So. As I lost my memories for the past couple of weeks, I haven't had time to make a very important announcement. Nate and I are now the proud parents of twin terrors, William Garland and Ashley Jeanne Harvelle-Wuornos. They have got to be the most damned adorable babies I've ever seen. And they've both got quite the set of lungs on them. I love my family so much. I couldn't be happier.

I am so thankful that this mess didn't happen during the full moon. I don't think I could have lived with myself I'd wolfed-out and hurt someone while not having my memory.