( colligo ¬ get collected ) → network.

So, I have this enormous skyscraper, and I keep almost packing up and moving all my stuff into it, but every time I do it's just so quiet that it kind of freaks me out. And since I don't yet have the cash to hire people to hang out with me, I was thinking about something Steve suggested earlier.

You should all pack up and move in here.

We've got an archery range. Fully outfitted science labs with holographic lab environments.. A couple of gyms. Still working on the holodeck, but it's just a matter of time. Several fully stocked wet bars. A DJ stand in the living room because I don't feel like moving it. A truly ridiculous number of guest rooms. Fully automated everything. JARVIS. A fireplace you turn on by clapping. AND all the electricity you could possibly want.

And Avengers, before you say know, this should be interpreted as a team-building mandate from Captain America, which might make it an act of treason to disagree. (You can also bring friends, but these friends will be evaluated on a case by case basis, and can't be given the codes to our super secret moon base without my prior written approval.)

---

_{* Maria and Howard added later as the result of emotional blackmail.^**
** Fucking Steve.}

[ The resounding clang of metal on metal drowns out the beginning of a dialogue, and even as the voices grow louder, a storm of swords can still be heard loudly in the background, punctuated by shouts of manly, English-accented rage. ] YOU! THE MAN WHO WEARS THE ARMOR OF A WARRIOR! WHO DARES TO CHALLENGE THE MIGHTY THOR, YET MAKES A MOCKERY OF ASGARDIAN BATTLE PROCEEDINGS? VERILY THOUGH DIDST NOT RECKON WITH THE MIGHT OF THOR, KNAVE!

[ A large object (a hammer?) smashes through something wooden, sending books to the ground in a clatter and temporarily immobilizing one fo the guards, but lo! It impedes him little! ] UNHAND ME, VILLAINS! I WOULD TAKE MY LEAVE OF THIS LAND AND RETURN TO MY RIGHTFUL HOME!

YOU FLEE, COWARDS? RETURN THIS INSTANT, AND GIVE ME THE ANSWERS I SEEK OR I SHALL BRING ABOUT A STORM THE LIKES OF WHICH YOU HAVE NEVER SEEN. YOU WILL ANSWER FOR THE TRICKERY YOU WROUGHT AGAINST THE SON OF ODIN, YOU MEN OF METAL! DESPITE YOUR MANNER OF DRESS, YOU ARE SURELY NOT THE COHORTS OF MY FRIEND, THE MAN OF IRON.

[ a long pause, as Thor bangs against the door hard enough to rattle them on their hinges, but receives no answer. ]


WHAT CRUEL DECEIT HAS BROUGHT ME HERE? BROTHER? IF THESE ARE MORE OF YOUR GAMES --- [ A shout of indignation, and the sound of thunder and lightning cracks through the silence like a gunshot. It's likely that people actually heard this happening before they heard it on the post.]