welcome to storybrooke ❧ network community

This place is giving me a headache. All of the temporal inconsistencies. How do you all not tear each other apart?

Maker's breath I must say, this place is fascinating. If rather inconvenient

But then, I suppose life never goes quite how one might wish.

I suppose it was too much to hope life might stay dull for just a little while.

Maker's Breath..

Magic that held everyone here was undone by a child. There will never be a day when I understand the ways of it. Though I felt the barriers go down. It was unpleasant.

[Filtered to Dorian]
The world is open now, did you want to take time to go explore it? It's likely better I not be seen and stay here, but you should go, if you want.

What the hell is this doohickey? How does it work? Is this...?

Hello? Can anyone hear me?

This sure as hell ain't Paris...

I understand everyone's excitement about the town barrier being down, I really do. It's not exactly a way home for many of you, but it must be nice to know you can venture out and explore beyond this town. I'm sorry we don't have more answers about what you will find out there.

Because we don't know so much, I urge you to be careful if you do venture outside of town. Please don't go off alone, take some means of communication with you, such as a cell phone. We don't know how far our network will extend and we want you to be able to call for help if you should need it.

We've managed to get by this far by all sticking together and we need to do that now more than ever. I know we won't get the answers some of you need about what's waiting outside the town line without exploring and I'm not telling anyone not to leave. I just want you all to be careful. We are all Storybrookers, no matter what realms we originally came here from. We're a family and I think it's more important now than ever that we remember that.

Charming

That said, how do you feel about checking out some portals with me?

Driving is more complicated than it appeers. And yet, still less trouble than a horse.

There are too many different kinds of mailboxes, and I'm not sure what the one I ran over looked like before it was unfortunately flat. I was just going to replace it in the middle of the night and hope no one noticed, but I have to actually ask them what kind they had.

If they have no preference I'm putting up one that looks like a tiny house.

The car was already dented, but I am still sorry, Neal.

With Isabela gone again, people ask me for things more often. If I carry the sword to the tavern again will I be intimidating enough again that they'll stop?

Someone tried to ask me for advice on their love life. As if I have any insite. I'm not even sure why they have one at all.

[Filtered to Dorian]
Your Inquisitor does have a point. More of us seem to be gone than is usual. You're not feeling as if you might wander, are you?

I would say that I would tie you down to something, but you would turn it into an entirely different meaning and I would only get flustered.

And now Cullen is missing so I can't even make him uncomfortable by playfully flirting with him. I do believe this place is out to get me.

Hands off Cole. I didn't adopt a spirit to watch his disappear

There are an unecessary amount of holidays in this world that people want to set food on fire for. And people seem to want to talk about it. I have no interest in what meat they're setting on fire. Stop telling me.

The game was unfairly weighted against those who don't use ranged weapons.

Gwen Stefani would have made an excellent bard.

So, one minute I'm kicking ass on a giant demon spider, and the next I'm in...  Maine?  What's a Maine???

Ugh. Magic.

Had enough of that, thanks.

I've found a pirate bar. I think I'll just drink until I stop caring that I've been brought to this place.

The recent celebrations were certainly lively. And entirely inconvenient for those of us attempting to read Even if I still do not understand the point.

Max, my friend, did you enjoy the company fireworks? I'm sure you found them very pretty.

Yesterday at the tavern, someone drunkenly told someone else they reminded them of their favorite right shoe they had when they were seven.

I thought that was very specific for a drunk.

Thank Andraste it's warm again.

[Filtered to Neal]
Do you perhaps have an hour or so tomorrow afternoon? I want to move some things around, but it's odd to ask Bull and if I ask Hawke she'll end up snikering the entire time. Again.
[/Neal]

[Filtered to Dorian]
If I give you a book that someone at the Hanged Man promised was good, will it be all right if I ask you to stay out of the apartment for the afternoon tomorrow?

It is nothing bad. I just have something for you.

This world is quite strange and it has many things about it which I cannot begin to comprehend.

But showers? Showers are amazing.

[Filtered to Thedas people/Honorary Thedosians]

Me and Dorian broke up. Mutual decision.

bull.

I need to talk to you.

fenris.

There is something I wish to discuss with you, amatus.

cullen.

Love is terribly confusing.

Maker's breath, this is more than a bit odd, and that's coming from someone who wandered about the Fade. But hey no one's tried to kill me yet, so there's that. I'm Hawke.

No. I did not steel and then fall off a horse. Peep People can stop asking. I have no use for horses, and was not that drunk recently. I do not even know what French sounds like.

Why does it insist on getting warmer one evning and then cold agan again the next? You never have a chance to grow used to it.

But it is at least not snowing.

And food that makes your fingers change color should have warnings.

But someone should have told me about the pudding in cups earlier. Those are good.

Drunk people in this world keep trying to touch my ears and. I think I may prefer when they are used to elves and just call us knife ears. Or try to take us as slaves so I can kill them.

What is the diference between movies and the things that show in the rooms we live in and why do people pay to go to them and then come to a tavern to pay for drinks and complane about how expensive they are?

[Anders]
It is absurd that I have to talk to you when you don't even like me and I used to imagine what you'd look like beheaded. But I don't anymore and you are too qwiet. Are you well?
[/Anders]

[Dorian]
If you're not busy with your Qunari would you like a drink? After I've just complaned about drinkers. Why would I ask that then.

So, I found Tumblr. And it is positively delightful. Really. I quite like it.

However, the internet certainly does seem to have quite the preoccupation with the idea that the Commander and I are engaged in a torrid affair. And that is simply not so.

While it's true that Cullen is desperately in love with me, and his relationship with the Hero of Ferelden is clearly a means of coping with his inability to be with me, I really do have too much on my plate to be bothered with having feelings for him as well.

I'm sorry, Cullen. Truly. I hope our friendship will be enough to get you through this.

Also, what are hipsters? Apparently, I would make a fantastic one, which makes me very curious.

( trigger warning: discussion of suicide )

Has anyone seen Anders? He didn't come home the other evening, and I didn't think too much of it until but I thought he would make it back some time today, but it's well after midnight, and I still haven't heard anything. Someone please tell me they've heard something. Please. I'd appreciate any information anyone has.

Is this kind of cold how it often is here? The heating inside is nice, but it is not quite the same as a fire to sit beside.

[Dorian]
Are you all right? You did not have to leave so quikly.
[/Dorian]

[Iron Bull]
You hurt one who trusted you not to. You will stay away from him, now. He isn't yours to hurt at will.

I will not ask again.

It is for reesons like these that magic cannot be trusted. It takes without asking and is never truly what you wish it to be.

Isabela left without saying goodbye. Sounds like she sprung a bunch of others out, too. Pirates, eh?

[ Anders ]

You're the only one I can talk to about this, and you forgot me. Figures.

[ Killian ]

Need any help running that tavern of yours? I've got enough coin saved to invest.

This whole vacation thing is starting to chafe on me. Don't get me wrong, I'm enthusiastically fine with none of my friends being hunted down by darkspawn and blood mages, so yeah, thanks for that. Less paper wasted on bad news. It's just—you don't get used to moving every few years without feeling a little bit like this is actually a Fade trick, and oh, surprise! You've been dead this whole time. No Andraste's fiery bosom to rest on, sorry.

Anyway, snapchat. We need this thing in Thedas. Can I bring it back with me?

(  cut not ic & (safe) pics ahead!  )

Bethany! Are we making a bonfire tonight or not? I found puffy melty things to roast.

[Dorian Pavus]
I apologize for the events of the ball. It was not intentional.
[/Dorian]

[Isabela]
I blame you for the ball and am not going anywhere else you atemt to take me.
[/Isabela]

It has been some time since I've been unable to just pick up and leave when it is time to move on. The caged feeling was not missed.

You know, the last time I woke up in the middle of a group of strangers with no idea how I got there, there were much less clothes involved. Maker, that was a good night. Between the pirate and that lay-warden with the griffin tattoo...

So, does anyone want to explain this place?

[ Dragon Age Crew ]

Hi! Hawke here. Seems like a lot of us are showing up from the ass end of Thedas these days, which kind of ruins my big entrance, but fine. I can work with that. Never let it be said the Champion isn't gracious.

Thing is, we're all squashed together in a tiny space right now, and it feels a lot like bringing a Chantry Brother to the Blooming Rose with two smugglers and a very hungry mabari. Awkward, right? Yeah. Thought so. Either we learn how to make friends with each other like not-demons or we end up with lots of yelling and probably red lyrium. Trust me: not worth it.

Still with me? Good, because you're going to help me now. My plan: everyone picks a job they want to work on that can help the rest of us. Make potions, cook meals, sew scarves—I don't care, it's up to you. If we're all forced to work together, we'll be too busy doing nice things to have time for setting things on fire. Unless you're a dragon, then carry on.

If you're opting out of this, I'll need a Maker's balls-sized good reason why or else I'm making you dance in front of everyone wearing an outfit of Isabela's choice. You don't want that.

This won't be at all uncomfortable

It would seem there have been quite a few arrivals from Thedas recently. I haven't exactly been keeping track of how many want me dead, but I imagine it is a fair few

( nate )

Try not to shoot anyone. Even if they say unpleasant things, I probably deserve them.

( hawke )

Bets on who attempts to murder me first? I know you love a good wager.

( fenris )

How are you settling in here? I hope Isabela and Hawke haven't gotten you into too much trouble.

( solas )

Justice is willing to speak with you. You had said that you wished to, before you would agree to help separate us.

( The post is just an upload of a video of Cullen typing something on his phone, then looking horrified and embarrassed and frantically flailing about and swearing while typing more things. You're welcome, Cullen. )

I can make no sents of this place.

They said there are people I know here and that this is how I talk to them?

Even for magic this is nonesense.

Nathaniel, before you say anything, yes, there is in fact a box of kittens in our shared living space.

But, in my defence, it's a box of kittens.

Hate to admit it, but this place is much better than where I'm from.

No one's trying to kill me. Nothing's on fire. No crazed lunatics attempting to take over the city. I could go on, but I've got new things to explore.

Also no more sweating my ass off. Whoever invented this air conditioning thing is a genius.

All right. What the fuck happened to my magic?

What Where What's going on Where is he?

I don't understand.

Oh Maker, what have I done?

Isabela? The woman who met me and gave me this said that you were here? What is happening? Is this the Fade?

I can't say I care about this Hydra thing that seems to be throwing everyone into fits.

It does sound like you're all getting worked up over a great deal of nothing.

But it's no matter. I'll carry on with my drink and shepherding an elf who's moved from brooding to angsting.

Well, it certainly looks like things are getting more interesting around here.

Is everyone going to start bringing their crazy Nazi baggage from back home now? I'd just like a heads up if that's going to be a big thing.

( Papa )

I can't believe I'm asking this, but is there some kind of magic we could use to sort this out? Nothing big, but I know there's minor magic that doesn't have the same costs. It's not like everything goes to hell every time we do a locator spell. Aside from lining them up and asking point blank if they're evil while Emma uses her lie detector power, or waiting and hoping, it definitely seems like the best option.

I just don't like the idea of that kind of threat going around unchecked and unknown when Emma's pregnant. Call me overprotective, but I want to know that my family's safe.

Neria has gone. This world takes people away so freely, and you can't even mourn them because they've just gone back to their home, where they will never know the people they spend time with here.

It's terrible and I hate everything and have no more wine. Isabela? You're not gone, are you? You always have something to drink.

I am not sure how I have been in Storybrooke for this long and have just now discovered the wonderfulness that is bacon on a cheeseburger.

Darcy, I blame you for my lack of knowledge in this department.

And what is the procedure for when a woman gives birth here? I am not exactly sure when Padme is due to have the children, but I would like to know what is done here, when that time comes.

Boredom.

Let's play Fuck/Marry/Kill.

Either just pick someone, anyone for each category or give each other three names and stick them in the categories.

You guys know how to play, right?

I'll start.

Fuck: Raylan Givens. Because of reasons.
Marry: Clark Kent
Kill: Clint, if only because if I put him in the other categories, I might get shanked or something.

Your turn.

The whole of the house smells like something that would be used as poyson poison on an assasin's blade, but my room is no longer the color of cheep leather. It is an improvement.

There are very few fights at the Hanged Man. I feel as if the name should be changed, as it holds nothing in comon with its namesake, save for Isabela's rear being eternally perched before the bar. There are even parts of the floor that are not stained with blood. I didn't know that was possible.

I do not understand how magic can make you want to tell the truth to a device. It's not even a real person. It's maddening. I hate magic.

I don't actually hate Anders all of the time, anymore.

I am getting accustomed to not wearing armor, and then hate how vulnerable we are in this town that never expects demons or darkspawn or blood mages. I like it, and hate liking things. They are too likely to vanish.

I hate that the Ferelden King is here, because he was a friend and fellow hero to Neria, and I cannot compete with a human King. Even if he has strangely shaped eyes. And looks just like another from this town.

I just want her to like me more. I do not see why she would. I have done terrible things, and she is good.

The television still startles me sometimes.

I hate magic.

I am a terrible man and a fool.

And I am sorry.

And I would like to be drunk now.

How's this for a confession...

I'm happier in Storybrooke than I ever was at home.

I suppose elven magic mirrors aren't all their reputation makes them out to be. They said that people would be able to hear me through this ridiculous contraption.

Do people really live in a place such as this? It's abysmal.