welcome to storybrooke ❧ network community

Earlier today a body was found behind Granny's. We're working on figuring out exactly what happened so please bear with us. If you have any information, please contact us at the department.

{filtered to people with law enforcement experience}
If anyone is interested, we will happily talk all the help we can get.

{filtered to Neal}
Guess who won't be coming home anytime soon tonight?

Oh thank goodness. There's been a murder.

Hey Logan!

Get your furry ass over here. I'm introducing you to Oregon Trail. Anyone else who wants to join in, you're welcome to. The rules of the Oregon Trail Drinking Game are as follows:

* Shoot too much food, take a drink.
* Get a disease, take a drink.
* Get an injury, take a drink.
* If you successfully ford a river, take a drink.
* If you fail to ford a river, take a drink.
* Arrive at a monument, salute it by taking a drink.
* Anything happens to the wagon, take three drinks.
* Die? Shotgun a beer.

Good? Good.

Throw your name in the basket and let's go.

ETA: https://archive.org/details/msdos_Oregon_Trail_The_1990

[Filtered against Peeta]

Can someone tell me about this holiday? Valentine's day?

...

Maine, huh?

Well, now Cleveland is beginning to look like it was a better alternative after all.

I was greeted by a fairy dressed as a nun, and then told to talk to people via a tiny computer. I'm not entirely sure this isn't a hell dimension. But hello, then. If it's demons bent on torment reading this, just bring on some hellishly fancy coffee and modern pop music and you'll be amply set to torture properly.

I would bang Mike Rowe in a heartbeat.

And I hate that I'm suddenly quite open about it. I hate love, in fact. The feelings and the hurt and doing the right thing even though you still care. I regret not saying it when I should have. I hate feeling weak.

Bloody hell.

I need to shoot something.

I don't remember there being a Storybrooke in this part of the state.

But then, I don't remember magic portals being a thing. And I do remember how I got here. So this can't be a dream. Whatever remains, however improbable, and all that, right?

Still doesn't make any sense.

Sometimes I want a dog, I mean I know I'm a vet and see animals all day long, but I want my own dog.

Nick, we should get a dog.

I hear people are having trouble with lying.

Does this include lying by omission?



[Filtered to Juliette Silverton]

Want to go on a date with me?

Most of the time, I'm glad they stopped showing all the crap shows and things we're all in here. But it bugs me trying to figure out how that happened, and where the cut off is. There's still commercials for Game of Thrones so that's here, and Stiles subjected me to the new Flowers in the Attic, but most things can't be found even when you make good friends with google. (Which also exists. Who is making the rules? If they're taking things away, why didn't they un-invent Bing and do us a favor for once?)

Mostly though, it means there's a million things I know nothing about, so I feel like my whole life of useless knowledge is actually useless instead of good for arguing with people who are wrong on the internet. I'm going to start making dents in the new pop culture that showed up. I'm starting with the knockoff Storybrooke-approved version of Battlestar. Which is called Warcomet, believe it or not. There is no Starbuck, who looks like Jane, either. Anyone want to watch with me instead of doing anything constructive?

Lydia, your pony-dog really likes the couch. Am I supposed to be telling her she can't be up there? I'm not good with doggy discipline. She has the eyes, so I just give her what she wants.

[Filtered to Stiles]
How are you holding up?

Does anyone want to spar with me?

I'd really just like to hit something or someone.

Whoever invented frozen coffee drinks is a genius.

Just saying.

I need book recommendations, probably something that someone isn't from though, because than I'll just judge them based on who they are in the books, and that's awkward for everyone.

[Filter to Katherine]

Hey, you're working the Valentine's day thing at P3 right?

I have a list of mock-tails I left on the kitchen counter if you want to take a look at them. I thought they might be fun for them.

[End]

I'm really starting to enjoy living here. I didn't actually think I'd say that when I arrived, but it's nice.

Typically, when I am whisked away to a far-off land, it is at a time and to a place of my own choosing.  Thank you to the young man who told me where I was, but knowing that am unable to return to Agrabah is hardly comforting news to hear.  Trapped, again.

I have been told that my husband is here.  Has anyone seen Aladdin?

Hello?

My name's Kimberly.

As much as I love having my own phone. Is there anyway we can contact people outside of this town..maybe not even from the same time?

Seriously, It's still '96 where I'm from, I've gone into the past before, but never the future.

What gives with this town kidnapping people anyway?

This is definitely not Portland.

My name's Nick Burkhardt, and I'm a cop. From Portland. Well... I am sure the last part was obvious.

I guess first things first.

Where's Juliette or Hank or anyone, and where do I get some food?