welcome to storybrooke ❧ network community

So I was thinking about Tommy's stupid post and how people kind of liked it. And then I found this post and figured whatever.

Malia Hale has a reputation for a remarkable talent at intimidating people. Additionally, she possesses the power to read the memories of others, however she must speak words of power to do so. Malia Hale is known for her marvelous knack at fighting in the dark and she is able to communicate with sloths in any language. She resists assailants wielding an accurate stinger that also grants a startling combat sense and she developed the talent to make hats appear from nowhere. Lamentably, Malia Hale is infamous for being woefully unskilled at seduction.

Would anyone like to join me at the beach this evening?

I hated this place on principle when I first got here. But after being stuck here for a while, its grown on me, in small ways. There's not much I miss about home, but home wasn't very welcoming for me when I came from. It was mostly made up of a few small rooms and a firmly locked door.

I hadn't expected to actually miss anything from there, but oddly, I do miss my sister. Much to my surprise.

But the best part of this place is the freedom. People say whatever they want. Even when it would probably be smarter not to, they still can say it.

What does everyone else miss most from their home? Or like the best here?

Yes, people from low-food worlds. I know the food is good.

This place kinda grows on you.

...my sister was sent home.

Some days I really miss my old girlfriend. She was always so reliable.

I think it's a good night for a funny movie marathon. All three Exorcist's should do it. Maybe a couple Paranormal Activities.

Oh, so sorry I missed your birthday, Sam. I was busy carnally eviscerating a Norse god. Hope it was lovely.

Never watch your own show. Repeat. NEVER WATCH YOUR OWN SHOW.

QKJ$%tf@RTHERYH3WH6Y7@!!!!!

Screw this place.

Seriously. Screw it like the television version of me got screwed while I'm here.

Filtered to Everyone but Sam:

Suggestions for a surprise party location tonight for Sam please? I know this is totally last minute, but yes, I'm totally serious about it. I need something to do, and I'm good at this. I can handle decorations, but I need help with the music (DJ or band), drinks and possible food (thinking more along the lines of hors d'oeuvres). I also have an idea to set up one of those Selfie Stations with accessories (funny hats, mustaches, feather boas, etc).

Any and all help is appreciated! Thanks!

Filtered to Tommy:

Wanna put your super speed to good use? I'll owe you one. :)

I think it's pretty safe to say this is the quietest birthday I've had in a long time. I don't even remember the last time I realised it was my birthday on the actual day.

Anyone mind telling me what the fuck this is?

[ filtered: magical folks & law enforcement / not his brothers ]

If you've noticed that the gazebo in the park is a little...broken. I'll fix it. I had something get the better of me and I couldn't really get a hold of myself long enough to stop and I kind of got thrown through one of the beams. It's an easy fix though. I have some construction history so we're good.

So yeah...that happened.

I'm going to go out on a limb here and explain a problem I have and ask people with any suggestions they have to fix it. All I want to do get rid of this thing. It makes me dangerous to those I know and those who don't have a clue who I am. I don't want to kill anybody. This thing...obviously referring to a "curse" that was put on me back in my world...universe...thing. It causes me to become more violent than I usually am and might does have roots that date back to the Jesus-walked-the-Earth sort of days.

So this is my SOS since I don't have a nerd angel to call and my brother is being kind of a dick.

[ filtered: adam ]

I'm sorry. Shit went the wrong way. You shouldn't have seen that. How's it going? Get settled at the new place?

[ filtered: sam ]

I asked for help. I don't think it'd do a lot of good though. Hear you got a job teaching people to shoot. I'm still surprised they hired you. I'm still a better shot.

[ public ]

Got a job as a bartender. I still haven't figured out what anyone does for fun in this place. So steer in the right direction because I'm going a tad bit stir crazy.

[Filtered to Malia and Buffy]
I've been meaning to check in ever since...well, my brother was a jackass. Things kinda got away from me for a while there. Anyway, you're both okay right? And Dawn, she's alright?
Sam.
[End filter]

[Filtered to Adam]
So, you might've noticed things are a little....frayed right now between Dean and me. I'm gonna move out for a while. I just wanted you to know you can come with me if you want.
[End filter]

[Filtered to Jo]
Things the way they are with Dean and me right now I don't think it's good for either of us to be under the same roof. I'm gonna move out for a while. I told Adam he can come with me and I think it'd be safer if he did but I'm not gonna force the kid, keep an eye on him for me if he decides to stay?
[End filter]

[Filtered to Dean]
The apartments getting pretty crowded. I think it'd be best I might I'm gonna move out for a while.
[End filter]

So, I should probably get a job. Anyone know if the shooting range is hiring? Probably as close as I'm gonna get to hunting in this place.

Okay.

What fresh Hell is this. A new condo level?

A magical town was not exactly what I had in mind when they said Michael was going to take me away. Celestial city of doom seemed more appropriate.

By any chance, is there a Sam or a Dean here? Or... Castiel? Bobby?

I highly doubt I am the burglar that the Dwarves and Gandalf are convinced I am.

I fear I have been more troublesome than beneficial.

How did I get here? Where's Dean?

Why am I living with a girl? Why are my clothes enormous?

It, uh, turns out that I don't know what to do with free time anymore. Which is crazy, and a little disappointing even to myself.

Should I be getting a job or something?

This is not what I expected. I think.

This is actually kind of lame but So... there's this ball thing coming up and I was wondering if anyone would be interested in going with me. I mean, I could always go alone but if my brothers both have dates I don't want to be the lame one on my own.

Well, that didn't work out like I thought it would.

At least I didn't hit a car. That would not have been fun.

( cut, no filtered )

Huh. The Interest here is.. really interesting. Also, kind of creepy. I guess Coulson wasn't bullshitting when he said we were on tv.

Step up from the usual mindtricks I get.

Fairy tales and storybooks? Where the hell did they get that from?

This isn't how things usually work around here. They don't usually hand out hardware to tap out words on.

[DEAN, JESS, ADAM, JO, ELLEN]

Jane Shepard's invited us over for a little party at her place. I'd like it if you all came and met her, she's a good friend of mine.

Also, I was thinking. Thanksgiving?

People are acting quite strange recently.

...is this normal for Storybrooke?

Anyone else going stir crazy because we can't leave and explore the rest of this world, or is it just me?

Magic. Right. I'm just going to go ahead and call bullshit on this one. It's either the angels screwing with me again or one of their pissed off big brothers.

How'd you Michael to shut up?

Right then.

My name is Emma Swan, and I'm the Sheriff here in Storybrooke. You've all met the Mayor, and been given your welcome kits, but if you have any questions, please feel free to ask me, or my deputy, David Nolan.

And if you could all fill this out for me, so I get a feel of who's who, that would be great.

<b>NAME:</b> <b>AGE/DOB:</b> <b>PREVIOUS RESIDENCE:</b> <b>PAST OCCUPATION:</b> <b>ANY SPECIAL SKILLS/ABILITIES:</b> <b>ANY SPECIAL NEEDS:</b> <b>ANYTHING ELSE:</b>


[OOC: Characters, can try to lie, but Emma has had the Blue Fairy charm the form with a spell that prevents people from doing so!]