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So I go from Paris to Maine. Through a magic portal. Meaning I either ate some bad escargot, or I am not yet drunk enough.

Hodgins, please tell me you drugged and kidnapped me for this crazy field trip from our honeymoon?

East Coast. Hmm.

I'd say this was new, but I'm pretty sure I already did the magic portal thing before. I'm guessing no one is going to make me princess in this dimension, but as long as you aren't making me or anyone else a slave I'll try not to complain too much.

Oh yeah. I'm Cordelia Chase.

As far as dimensions go, this one isn't too bad.

You know, I get that I've got a lot of bad karma coming my way, but saving the world doesn't warrant a week off and sleeping in without someone jacking you off to another dimension?

Beats Sunnydale crater though.

Now I'm up and screwed over though, might as well eat. Is somewhere named Granny's really practically the only place to go?

I'm beginning to get real sick and bloody tired of sodding magic bouncing me around from here to there. First that shiny bauble somehow got me to LA from Sunnydale then whatever this was that brought me here. And who names a town Storybrooke? Didn't think there was anything worst than Sunnydale. Anyone know where a guy can get some pig's blood around here?

My name is Mr Giles. I arrived here earlier this afternoon. I'm looking for a young woman by the name of Buffy Summers.

I guess we're not in Kansas anymore.

I've been through stranger things, but damn. Mama always said be careful what you wish for. I've been looking for a way home going on three years now. This ain't home, but it's Earth which is closer than I've gotten before, I guess.

Don't suppose anyone has seen any aliens running around. Little guy who farts helium? Human looking woman in leather who probably looks really pissed off? Psychotic asshole with a scowl and a braid? Maybe a crazy guy with a mask over half his face?

And if someone could point me in the direction of food, I'd be grateful. I've really missed cheeseburgers.

Right then.

My name is Emma Swan, and I'm the Sheriff here in Storybrooke. You've all met the Mayor, and been given your welcome kits, but if you have any questions, please feel free to ask me, or my deputy, David Nolan.

And if you could all fill this out for me, so I get a feel of who's who, that would be great.

<b>NAME:</b> <b>AGE/DOB:</b> <b>PREVIOUS RESIDENCE:</b> <b>PAST OCCUPATION:</b> <b>ANY SPECIAL SKILLS/ABILITIES:</b> <b>ANY SPECIAL NEEDS:</b> <b>ANYTHING ELSE:</b>


[OOC: Characters, can try to lie, but Emma has had the Blue Fairy charm the form with a spell that prevents people from doing so!]

Seriously? A girl can't have a few days for a break, ohhhhh no, well I don't think this qualifies as a sacred duty blah blah blah. I was going to Europe! Unless you show me something as cool as the Eiffel Tower, I'm gonna hit something. Or someone. The day's early.

Right, so I know all about magic, but this has got to be the absolute oddest thing that has ever happened to me. And believe me, when you're related to a Weird Sister, that is really saying something.

Is this really a thing that's happening or did I have a LOT more to drink than I remember?

Well, at least it's not another hell dimension. I think.

...Any chance this town has a butcher shop?