PARABOLICAL GRAFFITI

So, uh... what'd I miss?

I have this spell for turning water into various types of alcohol, which I've been dying use again.

So, does anyone want to get completely wasted try it out with me on Sunday night? The more the merrier.

PS I'M A WEREWOLF.

Uh.... I'm back from Vegas. Cordy, your car is fine.  And y'know, I think the arena was in Nevada, fuckin' desert looked fuckin' familiar anyway. Looks like I missed all the interesting shit, I'm sorry I wasn't around to bonk the fuck out of shit for you guys....


and uh if you get hitched out there it don't count right i mean it's not for real it's just vegas right? i mean i'm not saying i did just y'know for uh reference

Alright guys, I got a Pyro needs an ass-kicking and a ride back to LA, so I'm on my way to Vegas. Got my phone and all that shit.

Cordy I will take care of your car like it's my fucking own. Better than my own 'cause mine was kind of a piece'a shit.

If I ain't back in time for baseball then I'm lyin' dead in a puddle'a piss

Good times guys
see you post-asskicking

Fuck fuck cockfuck, this shit is fucking balls.  I ain't been able to get another answer outta that payphone, 702 covers like all of fucking las vegas and surrounding area, it's a pretty big fucking city to go sift through without a fuckin' clue, and she didn't sound too fucking happy what I could hear of 'er when she called back. Not fuckin' getting anyfuckingwhere. Gee, sure would be nice if somebody I knew was a fucking spy, huh?

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF fuck fuck fuck fuck

Who the fuck is calling me from fucking Nevada while I'm fucking playing baseball?  I've got a fucking missed call on my phone.

Called it back
a HOBO answered
it's a fucking
PAYPHONE

Ffffff. Look, has anybody seen a short mouthy English chick around? Short hair, smoker, talks like a fuckin chav? Answers to Allie, Pyro or Bitchtits? Probably seen lightin' random shit on fire somewhere? I mean, I ain't worried or nothing, just wondering. I was gonna drag her to my game but she's not calling me back.

Guess that means I got an extra ticket, who calls it?

ALRIGHT SO

HOT TIP: You better find your bookie & put your bets in for the minors season RIGHT NOW 'cause my first game's next week and they're gonna be refiguring the odds in favor of the LA Tar Pits real fuckin' fast
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I don't think I need to explain to any of you of the dire situation that we are in here. Kata has tasked us with getting Buffy back, and we don't want to let her down. We need our people here, and we need them safe.

Clark & Kara, I know that you two have great powers. I've read the comics, but I can't sit through an episode of Smallville because Lana is a whiny cow. Do you think that you can help with this?

Peter Petrelli the one with the sociopath girlfriend, the younger one, I think that you might be able to help with this, if you can. I don't know what the electric freak Elle can do against a vampire but we might be facing more than that.

Anyone else? Feel free to offer up suggestions. No one is to do anything until we formulate a well planned out scenario. We will be meeting in the lobby to discuss this.

Let me be clear here, NO ONE IS TO GO OUT ON THEIR OWN! We need to stick together here, if we have to lock down the hotel completely to protect people, we will.

Let's get this done.

Your Scout seems stressed.  I pity you all.  I have been in the company of a stressed-out Mickey in the past.

In your time of trouble I honor Blue Team bonds and place myself and resources entirely at your disposal.

Okay...this is going to sound a little weird, but I promise I'm not crazy. Um...did the afterlife get renovated or something? Because otherwise I'm not dead...and I'm kind of sure I was.

INDOOR BATTING CAGE > GET [CHECK]
CONFIRMATION OF AWESOME BATTING AVERAGE > GET [CHECK]
SUN SO WE CAN HAVE A BASEBALL SEASON AND THEY CAN FINALLY SCHEDULE AMATEUR LEAGUE TRYOUTS > GET?

I swear to God I'm gonna get shortstop on the Tar Pits if we ever START...

This is gonna be a pretty crappy St Patrick's Day, huh?


...Shit, thismeans my birthday's coming up, too.Wasn't really expecting to get to turn 23.

OK GUYS HERE'S THE DEAL

Like Cordy said, you don't know what you're doing you oughta stay off the streets.  Shit, I will admit that I am doing less running around than usual just 'cause there ain't a whole lot of bonkin' to be done and I don't like luggin' around the heavy machinery just to go grab a coffee, y'know? 

But I get that you guys ain't used to this.  The whole not-supposed-to-be-goin'-outside thing.  See, I grew up under air raids and blackouts and shit, and you can't go out durin' those, so I'm used to it.

Bit of advice from somebody who been there, then, right?  First off, you oughta have like a month's worth of food and water in your house anyway, but I bet you guys are fuckin' lazy 'cause you don't got a war goin' on so I bet you don't actually do it.  So get some pals together or some shit and go out to the store and stock up and then get home and don't be goin' to frickin' Target six frickin' times a day 'cause you ran outta frickin' Cup Noodle, ok?  Get your ass loaded up with all that happy crap that don't go bad and then get home and get cozy.

And shit, have your friends do the same thing, have them stay over, and have a fuckin' Blackout Party.  You guys got the advantage 'cause you don't gotta worry about your electric gettin' shut off in the middle, even.  You can play - I don't know, whatever video games you got right now, Playstations and shit - or watch movies or something.  Or fuck, play Monopoly.  Actually don't play Monopoly.  Monopoly is fuckin' boring 'less you're playin' it wrong.  But you get the idea.

I know we got at least two, three other guys who grew up in war zones - bitchtits, I'm lookin' at you, London musta been under lockdown more often'n Boston, right? - so maybe we can get some useful ideas goin' in here for the schmucks.

edit: oh fuck you all i'm goin to bed

I'm kinda glad there's not a sun right now.  It'd hurt the fuck out of my eyes if there was.  And my fuckin head hurts enough as it is.

Jesus this is why I don't drink tequila.  Fuckin hangovers.

Fuck me.

Are you supposed to be dead?

For some weird-ass reason livin' out your afterlife in Nutbar LA?

JOIN THE FRIGGIN' CLUB.

No, for serious. We're startin' a club. The Los Angeles Zombie Brigade: Too Stubborn To Just Lie Down Already.

We got t-shirts! And pie!*

( NOW IMPROVED WITH A PICTURE OF WHAT THE SHIRTS LOOK LIKE MORE OR LESS )

I cannot believe I'm actually saying this, but where the hell is Andrew when we need him? Like I have any clue how to handle stopping Darth Vader something like this. Hello, I actually had a social life in high school. I wasn't one of those dweeboids who devoted their entire life to what was supposed to be science fiction.

In other news, if everyone who can't totally kick some demon ass could stay inside where it's safe until the sun comes back, my head would be grateful. I'm about one vision away from becoming Coma Girl. Again.

So, on a scale of 1 to 10 I feel like shit right now. 

Hey, you wanna know something random that I used to totally take for granted?  Besides the sun, I mean, everybody's probably all fuckin' whining about that.  And besides, like, the Thursday night ESPN schedule, and monthly air raid drills, and my inevitable career in the majors. 

Nah, I'm talkin' Dunkin' Donuts.  Their things with the cream filling in 'em?  Fucking delish.  Used to be a treat once in a while t'go have a cream donut and an iced coffee.

Just checked their website and there ain't one in the entire state of California that I can find.  Goddamn. 

What the hell is up with all you people? You're all so fuckin' crazy. Y'know there used to be a time where you'd just go to your parties and get drunk and wake up in the morning and not remember anything. Now you all get drunk and wake up sad.

Why did no one tell me that the guy who played Vernon died? I mean seriously. I never got to pay my respects. He gave me an ass load of detentions.

And there's a Claire around here? That's a fat girl's name.

Petit. Leave your door unlocked.

Interesting weather we're having, non? You Americans never cease to amaze me, even after apparently being pulled out of the Game and dropped into the middle of another version of post-Apocalyptic Los Angeles.

I will admit that even I was a bit.. shocked.. my first day or so.


Hello, Pyros.

Hello, Michel.

dark & dark

Saint ( silly bloodsuckers? )





do N O T touch hyperion

Ok, y'wanna know another reason this whole thing sucks on ice?  I was kinda emailing this guy who's got a little amateur baseball team deal goin' on, and they fuckin' cancelled tryouts 'cause of the sun's gone.  See, now it's personal.  I was really, really lookin' forward to that.  I ain't played real baseball (y'know, the kind with an actual ball and bases and shit instead of somebody's skull and a handful of cap points) in more'n a year.

Oh, you brilliant, brilliant humans!
Although the words 'rift in the fabric of the universe' is rather worrying, I still applaud the effort!

OK yeah I'm bored of this no sun thing now let's have it back ok?  Fuckin annoying and I almost fuckin sprained my ankle doing my morning jog in the dark today.

How does this insane shit happen all the time and not make the newspapers?

I hacked this world's pathetic excuse for a space program's network and got into their satellite systems. There's nothing wrong with this star, the "sun." The star's functioning fine. And there's nothing obstructing the light path from the star to this planet - not another planet, a ship, a moon, or even an asteroid.

Someone care to explain how this is plausible? science has failed me

This is already fuckin' with my head.  I keep having to check my phone to know if it's AM or PM.  Must be what it's like livin' on that Air Force base in Antarctica, only we ain't got penguins and it's a lot warmer.

Well, how the fuck about that.  World's biggest fucking blackout drill.  Guess I'm putting in some goddamn overtime.

Look on the bright side, everybody's gonna save a fortune on sunblock.

(Haha, I fucking said "bright side," I'm a moron.)

No for serious though, I got a Maglite, I fought in the dark before, and it ain't like the goddamn thing can be gone so we just gotta make sure everybody stays calm and shit.

I don’t understand this. This… place can’t be Los Angeles. I can’t really remember Los Angeles back in 2005, but it didn’t look like this. Admittedly, I was only four years old at the time, so my memory could be wrong. What is going on? How did I get here?

The technology is so… different. I don’t like it. I can hardly interface with it. I miss Donald, Huey, Dewey, and Louie.

I LOVE THE WEEKNEND.

AND LASO RUM. YAYYYY.

ATNON! ♥

So yeah that big thumpin noise you mighta heard just now if you live at the Hyperion

that was me finding out I'm waaaaaaaaay too fucked up to dance a goddamn jig right now

hahahahaha

I... am not supposed to be here. I only walked out a door, that was all. I was going to speak with my brother, and then... this. I've never heard of anyone with the ability to send another away, to another place, to another time. I don't belong in this city. Or in this year, to be completely truthful.

And some disgusting creature had the nerve to attack me last night. He’s no longer with us because of his stupidity . He, well… he turned to dust when I squeezed too hard. I do believe I accidently ripped his head off. It served him right, though.

So, like...what do y'all past folk people do for entertainment around here? I'm getting bored. Isn't this city supposed to have an eternal sparkle of glamor with something to do 'round every corner? 'Cause all I've come across is dudes in dire need of plastic surgery thinking it's a good idea to try and attack a Gundam Pilot guy like me. Which isn't.

And speaking of that...what is up with them turning to ash? I mean, killing isn't a new concept to me, but the whole exploding into dust at the end of the whole ordeal is a little strange. Like something out of a classic an Anne Rice novel.

which is retarded, 'cause vampires ain't real

Why hello there beautiful shiny new Los Angeles how are you today

difficult to keep up in 'chatroom'
Scout - copies of memories of kgb esp intelligence unit & FOXHOUND
will give to you.


girl; not real
here?

Jesus Hell, I look like I got hit by a truck. The Pyro's got a goddamn right hook on her.

I'm gonna randomly link ya to a really shit-quality video of one of my favorite songs now, ok?

Dropkick Murphys - The Gauntlet

I'll be over here rockin out if ya need me

When I heard that L.A. was in some dire straights, this wasn't exactly what I had in mind. What in the name of the Goddess herself happened to this place? It looks almost as bad as Sunnydale, except it isn't a giant crater in the ground. Which, I guess, is kinda good since people are still living here and it'd be really not so good if they were all dead because the place imploded.

Had an earthquake. That's what I meant. Because that is so what happened to Sunnydale. Big, giant, honking earthquake. Complete with the aftershocks and everything.

Oh! Introduction! Right. I'm Willow Rosenberg. And, I guess I'm new here. Well, not new new, on account of me having been to L.A. before a few times, but I'm new enough to make an introduction and, well, I guess that's it. It's nice to meet you all! In a completely computer sort of way, of course.

I have the notebook finished for you, Mister Luthor if you wish for me to bring it around at some point.
I would have called you over the telly foam, but the last time I used it some old dame shrieked in my ear. To be brutally frank with you, it gave me quite the fright and I never want to go near one again.

Does anybody know what happens when you get hit by one of those moving tin squares on the roads? I almost got hit by one this morning. I want to know.