PARABOLICAL GRAFFITI

There are days where I know, just know, that the human race eliminating itself by a half or more would be the best thing ever because humanity as a whole pretty well sucks. But then I drown myself in scotch, wake up, and realize that's crazy talk. As much as I might hate the world, there are still occasionally some things that make it worth making an effort to save lives. Not many, but there are a few.

God help me, though, this is getting a little old, kids. We get it. You're badass. You want us all to know so we give your tantrums some attention. And I'm just enough of a masochist to give that to you for a moment, because you have finally roused me from extreme apathy and made me care. This is by no means a small feat but you did it! Take a bow.

Did you take it? Yes, take it, we're all waiting. Okay, taken now? Good!

Now shut the hell up. If I'm going to be stuck here in Wonderland on drugs, I'm going to have it involve less of these gosh darn freaky pleas for attention.

[OOC- Skins people, feel free to confuse the hell out of Hunter.]

I am still looking for people to work at my shop, Practical Magick. It is well under way but Morgan and I don't really want to have to be there every day of the week. If anyone is looking for a good source of income, I'll be more than happy to give you a job. There's only one thing, though. I'm afraid you have to be affliated with magick in some way. Can you use it? Have you used it? I don't really care what form it is, but it's better to have people who know what they're doing.

That's about it, really.

Quite a strange turn of events me being here.

( New Security Measures - READ THIS )

I don't think I need to explain to any of you of the dire situation that we are in here. Kata has tasked us with getting Buffy back, and we don't want to let her down. We need our people here, and we need them safe.

Clark & Kara, I know that you two have great powers. I've read the comics, but I can't sit through an episode of Smallville because Lana is a whiny cow. Do you think that you can help with this?

Peter Petrelli the one with the sociopath girlfriend, the younger one, I think that you might be able to help with this, if you can. I don't know what the electric freak Elle can do against a vampire but we might be facing more than that.

Anyone else? Feel free to offer up suggestions. No one is to do anything until we formulate a well planned out scenario. We will be meeting in the lobby to discuss this.

Let me be clear here, NO ONE IS TO GO OUT ON THEIR OWN! We need to stick together here, if we have to lock down the hotel completely to protect people, we will.

Let's get this done.

This place is going to make my head explode. It was so much easier back at home when everyone was just like 'Kill the Charmed Ones!' and that was it. That seems so much easier now, than stuff here. Isn't there any demon out there who just wants to rule the world, and then can be stopped after a few good battles, failed attempts, and then finally some good ass kicking? These things just keep coming. Or anyone who's main goal it is to just kill witches? A handy dandy 'how to kill it' guide for this world would be wonderful.

This places makes the the Halliwell manor look normal.

Hey Christy, still hell bent on being on the wrong side?

Okay, something strange is going on. The woods don't turn into a city in the blink of an eye, and Forks hasn't had this much sunshine ever.

Could someone please tell me where I am? Possibly even how I got here? Anything at all would be helpful. Maybe I've hit my head and this is all some sort of hallucination...

Edward, if you're out there somewhere, come find me. Please?

Anyone who has information on the whereabouts of Cordelia Chase needs to come forward now.

I have to get her back.

Oh, I was beginning to like the darkness.

Gtreetings, peasants!

I'm looking for a girl, the fairest maiden in the world. Her name is Giselle, and she has hair the colour of the sun at dusk, and the sweetest smile you ever saw. We were to be wed, but I fear something dreadful happened to her, but I've come to find her! Has anybody seen her? I'm certain a reward of some sort could be arranged, once we are reunited.

Paige, Piper, Phoebe, I need to talk to you guys. Like, now, as soon as possible. You've noticed Christy is back, right, Paige? She's...well she's evil, and my guess is she still wants nothing more than to kill all three of you. I don't want her to use me again.

My Mandrake root supply is officially gone. Exciting adventure to find some more? Yes, I think so.

Also need to pick up some more vials, I used my last two last night. Really, this whole demons and vampires being able to attack you all the time? It's getting old.

On the plus side of the giant storm that randomly hit, there were ducks swimming outside my apartment. It was kind of cute. No idea why they would want to be here.

Leo?

...

Phoebe? Paige?

Where is everyone?! And for that matter, where the hell am I?

This place is really starting to get depressing. And every time I try to leave I can't. It's like a curse gone all wrong and I just want to find a bloody Portkey or a fireplace attached to the Floo network so I can leave already. I'd even fly all the way back to London if I could get a proper broom on my hands. How am I supposed to help destroy horcruxes from here? How am I supposed to prove to Harry and Hermione that I didn't run off and leave them alone again? Some Gryffindor I was then. They could've gotten killed and I'd have been off hiding away at Bill's the entire time like the pansy that I am. They probably think that I'm doing it again. And Hermione, how am I going to right myself with her again if I can't go back and prove that I'm better than stupid Krum and what if they're all dead and I can't possibly find out because the only people here that are attached to the wizarding world are either Death Eaters, from some other kind of magic, or Lavender, and not one of them would be able to get me an issue of the Daily Prophet where I might be able to find out of Harry or Mum or Dad or Ginny or Fre


The food here is rubbish. All grease and no taste. Just like everything else.

This might or might not be an odd question...but does anyone here know how to lift curses or reverse spells? It's really important.

... what in the name of crushing black holes is Star Wars?

Better yet, how does anyone from this planet know a thing about my family's history?

After failing at my attempts to find an efficient magick shop, I have decided to set one up myself. I have sources for items and everything that is essential to magick making and circles and after some careful work I will have it all ready and open for business. If anyone needs a job, let me know. I don't currently have a lot of money but once everything's working out on the profit side of things - you'll get a lovely pay check.

I want to set up a Coven. Even if you're not magick inclined, we would love to see you at one of the Circles.

Don't you people get it yet?

It's not wise to piss this girl off.

HELLO? AM I USING THIS COMPLOOTER PROPERLY?

Pety little humanoids with your pety little games, but some of you are not human, are you? Oh no, no, no. So much more, so much brighter. Some of you have chaos that follows you around like puppies, lost on their way. Pretty pretty energies.

Mmm..who should I thank for the chaos?

Pretty pretty little sounds...pretty pretty little creatures. Pity, it's such a pity that you're all so weak.

Mmm..chaos. Must love it. Embrace it, love love, love. Give me more.


((OOC note: -facepalm-I apologize ahead of time for Wanda's insanity. She manifests herself in several ways inside of my head...her..insanity is one of the big ones. And I love it. It's like she's got a double personality..))

Some idiot just trashed my hotel room. My bets are, whoever it was busted through the door in hopes of getting their grimy hands on some important information. Well, guess what? I don’t keep my info locked in the vault sitting in the closet you dumbass. That was a folder filled with old pictures and approximately 20 dollars and sixty two cents. So congratulations, you now have a few family photos uploaded to a CD and enough money to get yourself a nice pair of pants at Wal-Mart. Tsk tsk, it looks like somebody is going to be in trouble when the boss sees what you got. I hope he strangles you, moron.

But anyway, I heard from some bird that a bunch of leeches are going to be holding an all you can eat buffet at the Grand Avenue Night Club, tonight at around ten-ish. So if anyone wants to come and kill things with me show up with a piece of wood, or you know, whatever you want to dust things with.

I need money. The Magic Box isn't going to re-open itself, you know. Angel. Cordelia. Whatever good-deeds you do that bring you money, I need money. I am more than willing to exchange goods or services for it.

Los Angeles is kinda gay, like the Willow kinda gay, not as an expression. Although maybe it is that too, I haven't seen much outside the hotel.

God, please please please let this just be some horrible nightmare. I'm going to wake up next to Lily any second. Wake up...

...where the hell am I?

OK, this is strange. Doors just don't randomly take you to LA. And since when did LA look this bad? And I didn't bring myself here, so this doesn't make sense.

And better yet, what's with this message boards? All this talk of vampires, demons, witches and robots. Since when do so many people know about these things? It's like a giant cult, and kind of weird. And with this being on the internet...so much for keeping secrets.

I still don't know how I got here. I doubt this is some kind of test from the Sisters, that doesn't add up. One minute I was in Magic School, and then I'm here.

I hope San Francisco doesn't look as bad as this place. So what's the background story on the weird and creepy going on around here?

I really can't handle this right now