PARABOLICAL GRAFFITI

I just wanted you all to know that there's more than one option around here when it comes down to exorcising demons and taking care of monsters. I'm a hunter and it's what I do. If you have a problem, particularly with demons, don't hesitate to come straight to me. It would be a better thing for both yourself and me in the long run because I need to face off as many demons as possible within the next few days before Dean.

My contact informtion is as follows: [insert email and phone number].

Don't know what a demon is? Most people don't. It's hard to tell. But if you see a friend that's suddenly acting completely out of character then that might be your first clue. Your second would be the smoke rising from the demons flesh after you douse it with holy water. I usually don't suggest that you hit them hard with the holy water though, since that generally means that they can't pull their little stunt over you anymore and will probably attempt to murder you right on the spot. So just call me if you have any suspicions. If there's a demon around, I'll figure it out. And if not? It's better to be safe, don't you think?

Alright, I know I can't possibly be the only parent out there.

I could really use some help or advice. I have a nine month old son and well...I am completely awful at being a mother! After what I did to my own! I SHOULD NOT be a mother!! I was never supposed to be a mother.

...some parenting tips would be nice.

So, who wants to explain to me how a werewolf got into the hotel this weekend? I know you all had other issues you had to deal with, but I hope you realized that Aaron - my BABY almost got EATEN! And if wasn't for Kitty he probably would have been!

So much for me thinking you were all so great. I swear if he was eaten I would have never forgiven any of you!

Thanks Kitty. I owe you one.

Really.

This was funny. I was laughin’ up my intestines a few minutes ago.

This real nice lady tells me to sit in front of her laptop just because I wasn’t about to go believin’ her about every insane thing that was spillin’ from her trap. All these nutjob things like its 2005 now and all these new flavors of Doritos are just insane and the ice cream place down the road has pomegranate frozen yogurt now. What the hell. Since when do they have frozen yogurt down there? That’s… not right at all.

So I’m sittin’ here looking at the date and I think I might be sick in the brain or in Hell, the sort that wants to drive me up the wall as a form of torture. I was lookin’ forward to goin’ to a nice meadow when I kicked the bucket, a nice meadow with flowers and a bar with lots of drinks and pretty women. LA 2005? That’s not a good afterlife, yeah? Did I do something wrong? Didn’t I burn up good enough? Wasn’t impressive enough, huh?

You guys aren’t all dead, right? Hey Cordelia? Cordelia? Cordelia? Cordelia? I’d type it again but if you read these things, I don’t wanna annoy you into not answering me. I’d put Angel’s name in there but can he even use a computer?

This lady’s house smells like cat pee.

I’m babbling now. I’ll be quiet and drink my whiskey. I never write this much. Type. I’m typing.