PARABOLICAL GRAFFITI

Not sure I expected heaven or hell but not LA. Friggin Hollywood Sign right up on the hill and some woman that tells me if I'm all lost and confused to log on to the internet to this weird board people keep talking about. I know people say it has all the answers but come on.

So I guess what I'm asking, while very aware how crazy I sound, is, Are there answers?, or is this actually some fucked up kinda limbo. And where is my Mom? Because if I'm here then she...she needs to be here too.

I propose a game to entertain while I wait in an incredibly long line for Starbucks to make me my coffee.

Anyone ever played The Excuses Game? The person to start says something like "I want to go to the movies." and the person who responds makes up some excuse as to why they can't. It can lead to some pretty funny and creative excuses.

So...I want a donut.

There was a slayer thousands of years ago, in Greece, I think. She was called at a young age, 12, maybe 13, and died at around 29. She was active for about sixteen or seventeen years before she died.

In two weeks I'll be twenty-seven, and active for twelve years. Still have a while to go to be the longest activated. But damn, watch out, I'm coming to beat your age record.

Yesterday it was one year since I arrived in Los Angeles. Many of you thought you were children at the time and started calling each other such names as 'stupid head' and trying to steal each others candy. I believe I spent much of my first day encouraging Sam to steal his candy back.

This city is definitely unique.

Still, I would never want to leave it. Not only because going back to my own galaxy would be quite bad for many reasons, but because I have grown to love it here. This place has given me the chance to have a life with my wife, to live free from the burden of leadership and to connect with people again. To feel and love the way I used to.

So, a couple of days early, happy new year, everyone.

Fluffy white wings. Look out, I'm that much more of a badass angel now. I think they even sparkle in some places.

I'm going to wear these things the next time I take down a demon. All fear the fuzzy.

Alright, I am going to follow Angel's example here and make up a list of exactly who is on my team. This is going to...
Put it off for months now.
And now it comes down to...
So Buffy. Where do you even stand?
And a second list of who is interested in joining my team. (either in a primary capacity, or a secondary capacity to Fred's research team- this means you report to her first and then to me if she doesn't need you and I need to make up the numbers.)

For those who don't know, I am Faith and I run the Offensive Team at Angel Investigations. Being on the Offensive Teams is a full time commitment. It's not easy and it's not casual. My team covers every single area of the city every single night without fail. This is regardless of who else is in the city at the time, we at AI make sure we cover the city, every night. We fight demons and vampires and do everything we can to protect the citizens of Los Angeles. Joining my team means three things.
1- Nightly patrols in pairs, on the route I assigned.
2- Training sessions with me, three times a week. This is not optional.
3- Reports after every single patrol. Again, this is not optional. I need to know exactly what was seen in which areas, and take the reports to Fred if more research is needed.

This is the regular routine, in addition there are complications if a new and improved bad guy hits the city. Also, we have the walk in-clients. The files get looked at by the command team and cases get assigned by us according to the relevant skills needed. So, let me know now who you are, so I can make sure this city is as protected as it can be.

Right, Now that we're past the big day and all that I'd like to know what comprises AI right now. Who's on the team, what they do, who wants to be on the team and what they can offer. Who lives in the hotel?

I'm still new at all this with this many people and this seems the best way.

[Spike]

Are you actually ever gonna take this seriously and discuss what we need to do, or do I get to do all the legwork. There might not be conveniant heroic necklaces to wear next time there's a threat

[Filtered; Xander, Anya, Tara, Kendra]
When the insanity of not real people showing up stops, you guys wanna go do something? Catch a movie? Or movie night in? Just anything?
[/Filter]

In two days it will be the twenty-fourth. Future Xander said I'm going to die in two days. I just thought I'd point out that one of the 'end of the world' things is happening in 48 hours, unless I'm getting dates wrong.

[Filtered; Ruby]
Apparently you went missing again. Did those people come back? Are you okay?

Medic. Band-aids. Chocolate.

Apparently things are becoming more solid.

The Factory is hiring. Talk to me if you need a job.

[Buffy]

Nothing is gonna change.

Jack...

Ianto...

Please just tell me the earth did not get stolen again or if its just the lack of sleep talking again?

My name is Gwen Cooper and this is not Cardiff!

Vampire Santa. It's wrong on so many levels. I had to dust a Santa. My inner child is sad. Who turns Santa into a vampire anyway?

Poll #4688 SAM MADE ME DO IT!
Open to: All, results viewable to: All

Who has better breasts?

See what you made me do, Sam?!

[Filtered to the Slayers]

We need some serious bonding time. So I'm proposing a night of kicking demon asses, followed by beer and blowing off steam at a club. You know, girly stuff.

[Filtered to Angel]

I've barely seen you since you turned up here you know. I think this should change.

[Filtered to Spike]

So if I decided to earn myself some more cash at your club, how annoyed would you be that I win every fight?

Wow.. noticed something at Walmart. Walmart is the antichrist.. oh wait, no it isn't But they have a new game system. Playstation 3! Seems it's been available since November 17th. Heard it was number one bestseller in just 24 hours after the release. Going to find out why very soon. Just didn't notice it there during all this hectic stuff taking place recently, since I only went to home and work. Very expensive, though. Like four to five hundred dollars, give or take. There's been violence over it. You know how crime-ridden this city can be. Robberies, thefts, beatings. Probably even deaths. Used to be that people killed over their deities, beliefs, revenge, or a piece of land. Now it's over games. Sucky. Damn, how far man has fallen

I'm planning to go get it from Wallyworld tonight. No way I could have afforded it as a low-paid scrub/orderly for Dr. Petersen. But as a CEO of my own company? Ohhh, Hell yes, I am SO going to get that! I hear it looks really great on a big HD-screen TV set. Maybe I'll get it after having some drinks at a bar. Or before. Whatever comes first. Who knows, maybe I'll even invite some of my friends over to play with it too. I think they'd like that.

Who here thinks that carrying guns to a bank, outside or not, is stupid with a side of crazy?

Please, raise your hand.

[ooc: forward-dated to the 30th]

Ruby are yo I am going to stake that Wolfram and Hart bitch and no one had better try and stop me I just wanted everyone to know if they dare to go and beat Lilah into the ground without me, that there will be hell to pay.

[Buffy]

Thank you. For looking for me.

MARRIED!

BOY!!! HOUSE, WEDDING PHOTOS. MARRIED!!! TO A BOY!!!

Lilah. Your ass is mine. And not in the fun way.

You know, I thought a vampire getting her own reality TV show and people getting all fannish over vampires was insane. Now, I'm pretty sure that almost seems normal.

LA, you are a special, special place.

Kennedy, hon? I'll be home late again tonight. Chief wants me to show some rookies the ropes. I told him it's been happening way to often, and there are other officers in this unit. But he won't have any of it. It's third shift, so I won't see you until mid morning again..unless you think that stuffy watcher of yours will cut the leash short for once and let you join me on my route? What'dya say, feel like sparing my sanity, help me out with the fresh meat? These guys are so green they can't hold a gun without their hands shaking.

Attention Slayers. I want your roll call. Now. Please tell me you're here, and also not acting crazy.

[Xander]
Please tell me you're you, and fine. Please?

[EDIT: Filtered, Xander, Fred, Jacen, Tenel Ka, Cathy]
Apparently we can blame Wolfram and Hart. What else is new.

Cathy if you learn anything new, could you share?

Yes, my wife is, it seems, strange when she's had too much sugar. I still dispute any claims that coffee is evil.

Now, I am slightly confused by This. It's a promo for a show that will air in the spring. I know I'm considered fictional here, but I didn't know there was anyone who really looked like me. But judging from this picture, when I mindtrick George Lucas into making our, frankly more interesting, story into holos, I should have this man cast as me. After I've watched this Tudors show of course and fully judged how much of a resemblance he has.

Faith and I need a wider view on This.

Few things first...

1. Faith is wrong about the tea leaves.
2. My point is logical and plausible. Look where we live.
3. If it happens I claim no responsibility.
4. Anyone else think she should write a song even if I don't think I have 'a stare'
5. Its all Jacen's fault. He let me have something called pixie sticks. They had a funny name and were very brightly colored. So I had six of them.

[ooc: The rest of the convo is still filtered, just consider the link a copy and pasted copy of that bit of the convo]

Soooo just gonna say it.

Tried to leave,  tried to drive back to New York.

Couldn't. Like, at all. Seems like the Powers have a plan to leave New York leaderless.

Freakin City

So AI, got room for one more till we work this out?

I have no toys or stuffed animals to jump at me. Thankfully apparently there are more toys here than I knew about to make up for that fact.

But I was watching Practical Magic and have a sudden craving for Midnight Margaritas.

I had this little tiny horse on a keychain and...well, long story short, my keys walked off. I guess it's not so strange if anyone's seen them walking around anymore?

I realize there's been talk on how to end televisions latest assault on our minds, but if we could do a group pow wow and hammer out plans, that would be great. And if you're secretly already planning something and you haven't told me, you'll be in for it. Cranky me isn't a fun person.

OMG Someone is STALKING ME!!! Like really...I keep getting these WAY creepy letters and that is so...

They're totally gonna want to cut me up like that guy wanted to with Cordy that one time...and make some kind of...eww.

Spikey you have to help me! You owe me!

Who dumps someone off in the middle of MacArthur Park in their PJs? If this is over the last bagel, that's just...wrong. I need to be back in New York so if the responsible person could set it right? I'd really appreciate it.