PARABOLICAL GRAFFITI

Eh...this doesn't look like Michiru's concert...

Don't tell me I got the wrong bus AGAIN! Maybe Haruka will let me go back stage again if I can get back in time.

Can someone tell me where I ended up? And the fastest route back to Azabu-Juuban.

Well hello LA. It's taken me a long time to get here but I finally made it. I'm looking for someone. He's not to tall speaks with what to most of you would call a 'british accent' and he looks like he's just turned up your door to tell you about Jesus. Only he's much more dangerous and completely insane. He answers to Harry and the Master. Oh dear it sounds like I'm looking for a lost puppy doesn't it? Not much difference sometimes. If you see him let me know.

Harry if you're out there I miss you darling, please come meet me. Oh, and I'm sorry for shooting you. I promise it'll never happen again.

Oi! What the hell is this?

I hate rain. Going to kill Madrox when I get back.

Scooby Doo, where are you?!

I just watched a musical. On the...box. Thing. And I have to say, it makes me feel very depressed. People just randomly bursting into song like it's the thing to do. What in the bloody hell is that all about? Who does that?

You muggles are very odd - what with your musicals and angry rap music. I mean, Merlin, I thought that Death Eaters were bad. But you 'gangster' folk really just know how to top it all, don't you? Very angry, you lot. And for some reason they always get the women. And that is shocking enough since they seem so bloody well terrifying.

What does 'bust a cap' mean, anyhow?

Where the fuck am I?

If someone pulled me here, so help me, I will hurt you.

What the fuck is going on? I'm not supposed to be here, I'm supposed to be in Michiru's dressing room helping her pack up to leave.

This place gives me the goosebumps.

Freddie? Velma? Shaggy? Scooby?

...

ANYONE? I'LL EVEN TAKE A GUY IN A MONSTER MASK RIGHT ABOUT NOW. Well, not really, but I'm just saying I'm sort of freaked out here, and that lady I asked said this is L.A. but I was just in Coolsville which is so not near L.A. Was I kidnapped or something and don't remember it?

What the fuck is this?

Augh, I'm sparking. Figures an alternate L.A. would be the one place I have to worry about water damage.

This is defiantly not Angel Grove anymore...whats going on? One second I was there and now not so much. This has to be some kind of trick, okay guys very funny. Can Pick On Rocky Day be over now? Wherever this is..the monster to human ratio still hasn't changed. Starting to miss the monsters back home at least they never tried to bite me.

This is unbelievable absurd! I refuse to partake in whichever game is being played here.

I need a location, a reason of why I was brought here without my expressed authorisation and a ticket for the next flight to England as soon as possible.

The woman beside me—I believe her name is Fiona— told me that this is called a computer, and that you can speak with people by pushing the buttons with the letters on them. Well, that is very odd, isn’t it? I don’t understand how this works. I asked Fiona if it was magic, but she shook her head at me like I was an escaped lunatic. The pure nerve of her! I am not insane, nor did I fall and hit my head. I’m just very lost, is all.

This place is exceptionally odd, and not to mention that I am not supposed to be in this world at all. There are great machines on wheels and the women appear to be wearing men’s clothing! Will they not be reprimanded for such a scandalous thing? Are they permitted to do that here? If they are, then I wish for pants as well, and I also wish to get rid of this god forsaken corset. I don’t even know why I still bother to wear it.

What do they call this city? I would like to know.

It would appear more and more people that I know are arriving, but at the same time, I don't know them. At all. It's a strange idea, to think there is a different version of me out there, though I guess I always knew it was possible. I think she is very different from me. Has this happened to anyone else?

I can only hope the others are OK without me, and hope to get home soon. Though I don't see that happening any time in the near future.

Oh my God. This isn't.. this is impossible. How can I- Oh my God...

I always suspected people from LA were all crazy, but now I'm certain. What the hell is wrong with this city?

Why isn't Lorcan here, yet? It's scary without Lorcan. And why do people keep trying to run me over? What did I ever do to them?! I was just crossing the road. People here need to be nicer. They need to be in Hufflepuff!

What sort of madness is this? This device... I've never seen nor heard of anything quite like it. How does it function? Furthermore, what are those monstrous beasts which roll upon the paved earth? One very nearly hit me, the nerve!

I demand an explanation. No one abducts Rowena Ravenclaw and gets away with it. Never mind that it simply isn't possible to pluck someone from the safety of Hogwarts in the first place.

Salazar, if this is one of your tricks I am going to be most displeased. The same goes for you, as well, Godric.

Curiouser and curiouser...

Hmm, hmm~. Dreary weather, foreboding atmosphere. It would seem this one has wandered somewhere too distant from the King's Court! It isn't uncommon for such a whimsy jester get lost in the past, but one has outdone humble self this time!

Ladies and gentlemen, children and elderly who bother to read these modest words. Yours truly is at your disposal to scatter cheer and laughter as is a fool's simple obligation; when in need of either or both, call this Mad Hatter as one is known for almost all. You will drop by for a mad tea party sometime, yes?